You Can’t Do That in Church: 7 Deadly Sins That Could Get You Kicked out of the Pews
Church is a special place and following the rules is part of the game
For some, attending church is a rite of passage. For others, it’s a chance to commune with holy forces. For still others, that weekly excursion is all about being social, catching up with family and friends before going on about the busy day.
No matter how you view church, there are some things you should never, ever, do there. These seven deadly church sins just might get you banned from the pews, so do yourself, and your soul, a favor by avoiding them at all costs.
Watch the big game
It’s a sad irony that church and football happen on the same day, but that’s just the way it is. Watching the big game on your phone while the priest prattles on may seem like a good idea, at least until you get caught.
Recruit for your MLM
If you’re a member of a multilevel marketing organization, the church pews can feel like the perfect hunting ground. Even so, recruiting in the Lord’s house breaks at least a few commandments, so leave that captive audience alone.
Read a book, other than the good one
Reading the Bible in church is encouraged, but reading the latest potboiler or romance novel is clearly not. There will be plenty of time to catch up on your favorite novel later, so leave it at home for now.
Gossip with your friends
There will be plenty of time to catch up with your friends after church is over. Gossiping in church is just bad form, so listen to the guy or gal up front and chat later.
Dress in a funny outfit
No joke; a parishioner once showed up to church in full clown makeup, and with oversized shoes and a rainbow colored wig. No need to say that worshipper was soon asked to leave, as his crazy getup was scaring others in the pews. You may not need a suit and tie to attend church anymore, but leave the clown outfit at home.
Fight for the good seats
This is the Lord’s house, not a Rolling Stones concert. All the seats are equally good, so grab a pew and start praying.
Arguing over a parking space
This isn’t the mall at Christmas, and fighting over a parking space is bad form (and probably a sin). If you need to walk a few extra steps so be it — just consider it the price of eternal salvation.
It could be argued that church is exactly the wrong place to show off your sinful nature. After all, this is the one place you always know God is watching.
If you want the big guy to be pleased with what He sees, why not start by treating church with the seriousness it deserves?
The seven transgressions outlined above may not be sins in the Biblical sense, but they will surely result in a well-earned frown from those around you.