You Can’t Be Everything to Everyone

Maybe it was unintentional, but growing up, my parents tried to always be adaptable people to everyone, specially my mom. My parents always made sure that every person I encounter would make of me a great person. To some level I understand their intentions, they just want their kid to be well liked and respected. Maybe they grew up looking at their parents trying to please everyone. That is when this habit started to have the snowball effect, because now, pleasing everyone and being that person, people trust and rely on is bigger than ever. I see how their attitude changes when they hear others talk well about someone else, they get a twinkle in their eye.

I didn’t know who I was in my teens. I always took up other’s interest and took on “successful” people’s careers as inspiration to pursue on my own. That habit became part of my high school career. I was not happy, it took a lot of time to realize what I was doing was that I was forcing myself in being everything to everyone. I was the future lawyer, doctor, accountant, Harvard alumni… Every person I met I made an impressive impression. Little did I know that it was emotionally exhausting. This pushed me into a hard time in my life. I didn’t know what to do for my future, I was so good at everything that doing what I love was not enough to give me a “successful life,” so I I went to business school without listening to my heart. Guess how that went? No bueno.

The moment I decided to only be myself and pay no attention to those who weren’t align with my views, that was the moment when everything became simpler. Slowly I started to recognize that the relationships I had with true friends and true acquaintances were more significant than people not liking me because I didn’t think like them. When I developed this healthy habit of paying attention to those who matter, my love for myself increased. I am not talking about loving me in a narcissistic way, but in a way of showing myself respect. Automatically I became more open to love, and naturally became more kind, so I have been told.

I have meet people who try to be that impressive person to everyone, and boy! They seem exhausted, and I have seen some sadness. I can’t believe I was doing that for years, living through the eyes of others. I am happy that I finally see now that being your kind self is very powerful and rewarding, because you only take in positivity and you give positivity back.

So next time you meet someone and you feel like you need to be different person, simply know that that encounter might not be for you, and that is ok.