You Cannot Hit My Child. But If You Do I Will Fuck You Up.
My son will be two in February 2024.
He is a lot more tenacious and rambunctious than anyone I’ve ever met can handle. Yesterday, while visiting a friend’s family, my son was himself, touching and picking up things and wondering into places.
He was leaping and jumping from place to place, no matter how many times I, or someone else told them to stop. I was there for 10 minutes when someone threatened to “thump him” in the head. This person was meeting my child for the first time…and felt comfortable saying that out loud as if I would be silent about it.
My son is spinning, singing, smiling, dancing, crab crawling, pulling on the blinds, touching the floor robot, and anything else that made him curious. Everyone I met, or who wants to hang out, I tell them that my son is super energetic and curious. He will touch things, put things that are glass, hazardous or imoirtant away, or don’t invite him over for playdates. Every time I think I’ve toddler proofed my home enough. I haven’t.
The other day, he had his legs up on our headboard and chewing on something clear. What was it? An electrical outlet cover we had put in less than 4 hours ago. When I checked the other outlets, one or both were on the floor. He has removed a safety knob on our gas stove and we only found out because I smelled the gas. We have three baby proof gates between the upstairs and downstairs. He has even shut off the toilet water? He twisted the valve off. He gets into any, everything and a lot more than most children, which is why we do whatever we can through programs, reading, brain games, long walks and even a 3.2 mile hike to help burn up his energy. He’s in programs like Tinkergarten, which is play in nature. He goes to playgroups twice a week. He chases our three dogs. We have a huge backyard, filled with so much waterplay items.
We have been at this since he was 8 months old. And while we’ve grown extremely frustrated and exploded when screaming words like STOP!!! LEAVE IT ALONE!!! GET DOWN AND OTHERS, we have never hit our child to be in your presence for 10 minutes, touches three things and you feel the need to threaten him in front of his mother, THIS MOTHER, you’ve lost your fucking mind. And then to have the audacity to say stupid shit, “well, he not gone stop.” You’re right, and you know why? because he’s a fucking toddler still learning and testing. And it’s our job as parents to help him pass the test. So maybe he doesn’t stop after the 3rd, 8th, or 11th time, but by the 12th time he has. I would rather say anything 100 hundreds times than to physically harm my child in any manner. Lots of parents/people are cool with it. I’m not. I do the emotional work to keep trying. To keep giving him grace. He is learning. And there’s nothing in this world should make anyone’s first teaching reaction to be harm, it shouldn’t be on the table. No one wants to get hit, but a lot of people sure like doing the hitting. I don’t believe in violence, but I do believe in going to war over my child being hit. Don’t fucking touch my child.