You Can Be Proud Coming In Second

Sometimes that’s a win in itself

My UNC Tar Heels lost to the Kansas Jayhawks in the NCAA Men’s basketball finals last night. I am beside myself with pride.

• Only three number eight seeds have made it to the finals in past. They’re (we’re) now the 4th.
• Coach Hubert Davis became one of the most successful first year coaches of all time by getting to the finals.
• The game stayed exciting. Kansas came out swinging, and then UNC went to the half with a huge lead. Kansas had to cut the highest lead ever at the half to win the game.
• It wasn’t a pretty game for either team. Lots of turnovers, but great defense. It was an exciting game to the end.
• UNC made incredible memories. Not only did they get to the NCAA finals, UNC topped rival Duke and handed Coach Mike Kryzewski a final loss for his retirement in the Final Four. (No disrespect to Coach K. He is a great coach.)

Most had low expectations of our team. The Tar Heels kept plugging along anyway. They knew they could win this thing, and let’s face it — they stayed in until the bitter end. How can you ask for more?

Kansas is an incredible team and they are certainly worthy champions. But my Tar Heels would have been also. Kansas had that extra push, and won. This year.

We often look at the odds, thinking they define our destiny. In this case the Jayhawks were destined to win, and did. But it could have easily gone the other way.

We define our destiny. UNC’s team experienced something few get to experience. How many of us could withstand the scrutiny of all the armchair “quarterbacks” taking note of our every mistake? How many of us make it to the national finals of anything?

Now my UNC team gets to go forward and come in second with grace. Sometimes that is the best gift to build your life’s character.

During the Old Days

In North Carolina, where I live, basketball is a big deal. What a sad life if basketball is your only deal, though.

When I went to Carolina, Dean Smith was our coach. One of the things I loved about him was he would lose a game to stand up for doing the right thing.

I was in the student section when Coach Smith grabbed the microphone and dressed down students for waving their hands behind the basket, hoping to distract the player making free throws. He told us (even though most other schools did it) we did not do that at Carolina. We listened. Oh, we listened. There was silence. I expect I am not the only one who learned a life lesson that day.

The best players would be pulled from the game for unsportsmanlike conduct. Even at clutch moments. He wasn’t coaching basketball players. He was helping raise men. And he was coaching student athletes. They were expected to graduate from college, even if they left early for the draft. Yep, Michael Jordan has his degree. Over 95% of the players do.

In college Coach Smith played for the Kansas Jayhawks. I know he would have pulled for the Tar Heels in this game, nevertheless. But he wouldn’t have let the team stay in mourning for a loss. There is too much more of life to enjoy, and players will both win and lose as they live this life.

This New Era

When the news of our coach was announced, I wondered how Hubert Davis would do as UNC’s coach. I loved watching him as a player, but a great player is not always a great coach. I’m sure he wondered a bit himself. Coming into a successful legacy and trying to appear worthy is a stressful position to find yourself in.

After this season I see him as a coach after Dean Smith’s own heart. I hope he continues his former coach’s traditions of building character while still winning games.

Coming in second brings no shame. Shame goes to those who never try to live their dreams. Shame goes to those who limit the boundaries of their life and box themselves in. Shame goes to those who won’t get back up after they get knocked down.

We played ball. We came in second. It was a good night.

“If you make every game a life and death proposition, you’re going to have problems. For one thing, you’ll be dead a lot.” — Dean Smith

Kim McKinney has been a UNC fan since she decided she wanted to go to college there and had to switch her loyalty from her beloved NC State (aka David Thompson years). Her father raised her to be a basketball fan. To his amusement and pride she slept on concrete during the coldest nights of the year to get good seats to basketball games during her time at UNC. She is still very competitive, but has learned to be a good loser. When the game is over.