You are responsible for your own happiness (and those around you)
Shine bright and impact people
I’ve been debating this topic for ages, in many shapes and forms.
The topic always arises through some form of generational comparison as to why one is better than the other or the confusion as to why it seems that in the day and age where we are thriving on all cylinders, the overall life satisfaction and mental health of the populations are steadily dropping. Now, why is that?
Now, from the get-go, I know the title seems like a bit of a stretch since there is so much we simply don’t have control over, but, try to follow along and if you’re still not convinced, reach out and let me know!
Change is constantly surrounding us
Economic disaster and strife, social distrust, heart-wrenching news, and not to mention, a worldwide global pandemic.
It seems like everywhere you look, our world is utterly doomed, and news are simply a reminder of the reality of it. Alongside those disastrous and awful events that have been bestowed upon us, the latest news never fails to include the novel technologies, remedies, and researches that are promising better futures.
Now, which the hell is it?
There’s been such a wide discrepancy in the recent present. In the time span of 10 minutes, any news anchor is trying to convince you of the harsh reality we live in, just to jump onto more hopeful and upbeat news about the fact that we could be landing in Mars soon, or that this new fad or technology has been scientifically approved and guarantees that your problems will vanish out of thin air.
In such times, it’s so easy to get overwhelmed and want to put a dent in your TV at the thought of all of this occurring in the world at once.
You first think that there’s gotta be something wrong with the opposite side, then the news themselves, then people watching the news, to finally embody the anger and give up your faith in anyone and everyone, and even go as far as think that there’s something inherently wrong about you, or the human species that populate this earth.
The Prisoner That unjustly got served 3 lifetimes sentences
Meet Rubin Carter. Mr. Carter was at the peak height of his athletic career and the fame and success that comes along with it. A then young and ferocious boxer, one that couldn’t be fazed by any hurdle that comes his way.
That all came to a halt on a fateful night in 1966, when Carter was at the wrong place at the wrong time. Carter and his friend were falsely accused of a triple homicide that happened in the dine-in right where Carter and his friend were parked in their car. He ended up getting served 3 lifetime sentences. Totally inequitable.
Upon arriving at the maximum level prison, he immediately made sure that the warden knew that he committed no such crime and that he was not to be treated as a prisoner. Carter refused to wear regular prisoner apparel. He refused to succumb and let them bully him into obedience.
He knew something that helped him make the most out of his time in prison, and leave a better person he came in as:
They can take away everything from you, even your physical freedom, but they can never take away your attitude and demeanor.
Carter went on to publish his autobiography as well as read and learn extensively during his time in prison.
“Nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so,” as Shakespeare put it.
Now, I tell you this story as well as remind myself the fact that you, and you alone, are responsible for the way you show up to the tragedies and hardships in your life. You have in your power, to either decide to be influenced negatively and let people rob you of your inherent power, or face them head on and turn everything you touch into gold. The choice is yours.
Complete Ownership
It all comes down to rejecting victimhood. Realizing that it all starts and ends within yourself, the skill and ability to formulate life to a perception you desire, that gives me personally a boost. It’s a tough pill to swallow, but just like medicine, will make you better in the longer term.
Got fired at work? Cool, broaden your skill set and connections, as well as redefine success.
Partner broke up with you? Sucks, either means that you have areas to improve or that you need to find someone that fits your values.
Disheartening news every night? Stop watching the news, rearrange your priorities, and in turn your life, and make any small incremental changes in the world where you see fit.
Admit the suck, own it, and let it transform you.
Projecting your hardships onto something or someone negates your chances at making change, since essentially, what you’re admitting to is that you are incapable of doing anything about it, and that you’ll always be a victim to it.
But what if you can’t change the outcome immediately? Alright, change your mindset around it.
Be a light in the darkness
Starting within, you have the chance to reject the negative, and welcome the positive in your life.
You are a walking-magnet.
Never underestimate the power of beliefs and convictions. Be ready to assume full responsibility for your happiness and the daily struggles life throws at you, because if you can keep your head above water, people in turn will be inspired by you and that creates a domino effect.
Be a light in the darkness, and slowly you’ll meet with other dots of light along the journey, amplifying it to become a full-lit room.
When you feel a lack of love and empathy in the world, start loving yourself and being empathetic to yourself. Build yourself from the ground up, challenge beliefs, keep improving, integrate values that make a society stable, and slowly branch out to others when you’re ready.
“Happiness is an inside job. Don’t assign anyone else that much power over your life.” — Mandy Hale.