Why You Shouldn’t Blindly Follow Advice From Gurus
What worked for Seth Godin, what will work for you, and what generally works for people — are three different things.
Seth Godin says:
“Real artists ship.”
Having deadlines is important in writing.
But then I read Haruki Murakami’s take:
“Art shouldn’t be given any time constraints, it should flow and develop freely.”
“What’s the right approach to writing then?”
It’s the obvious question to ask. It’s natural to wonder, who — among these world-class authors — is right.
But it’s also the wrong question to ask. There’s an alternative.
I Spent Years Collecting Wisdom From Other People
All my life, I had people to learn from.
When I dropped out of college in 2017, I started a project called “Ten Mentors.” I brought together the top-10 most successful people in Russia and asked them questions about business and success for my YouTube channel (and later, a book).
The questions themselves were naive, but this intellectual journey (which lasted 14 months) was invaluable.
This year, I brought together all of the lessons I learned from my “heroes” — people I have never met but learned from through content. One hundred lessons from 10 different people are all neatly organized in a self-published book on Amazon.
I learned a great deal from both my ‘heroes’ and ‘mentors’ — and received some of the best advice.
Like most young people, I blindly followed most of it.
What Happens When You Don’t Know Which Advice To Follow
YouTube and Medium are filled with advice from gurus, bloggers, and self-help authors.
Do this. Watch that. Here are seven habits of highly successful habits. Here are ten more habits. Here’s the ‘only’ app you need this year. Here’s the book you can’t miss out on.
Most of this advice contradicts each other. You can’t have ten different and, at the same time, ‘only’ apps you need this year.
The obvious question to ask is, ‘Who is right?’ and ‘Who is wrong?’.
It makes sense to spend just a little more time researching when you don’t understand what you need to do.
Why Advice Is a Terrible Tool For Self-Development
One of my “mentors” was my dad. In our interview, I asked him to give advice to his 20-year-old self. My YouTube audience loved that question, and I was interested in the answer myself.
But instead of giving advice, he said:
“Advice is a terrible tool for self-development…the problem with advice is that the person who gives it doesn’t have skin in the game.”
Everyone is looking for advice from authority figures, celebrities, and the successful ones. Most people don’t need it. Most people know what they need to be doing; they are just looking for permission to start. (By the way, you have permission, so start!)
But advice itself is a bad tool for growth because the person who gives it has no downside if that advice is flawed.
More than that:
What worked for Seth Godin, what will work for you, and what generally works for people — are three different things.
The Right Question To Ask Yourself
So — instead of researching and trying to understand which ‘app’ is the only one you need this year, I propose we go in a different direction.
We change our relationship with advice and gurus in general.
If Steve Jobs says, “Eat cabbage,” and Oprah says, “Eat tomatoes” — you don’t spend time researching for whether you need cabbage or tomatoes.
You ask yourself, “Do I actually like cabbage? Do I feel good after eating tomatoes?” — and listen to the answer.
Instead of blindly following advice, or trying to understand which guru is right, how about taking authority back?
What if we listened to ourselves more than gurus?
What Do You Think?
Writers on Medium like to quote famous people. (I do this all the time, too)
But every time I read other people quoting Steve Jobs, I want to ask the writer, “Yeah, that’s great…but what do you think?”
After all, if you’re the one writing a piece, it makes sense to say what you think.
The same with advice: when you see an interesting thought, idea, or hear somebody telling how you should live your life, ask:
Yup, that’s interesting. I like that. But what do I think? What’s my take on this?
After accumulating so much advice from different people, and writing a few books on the subject, I realized that any statement or advice should be challenged, no matter who it’s given from.
Even this piece. Challenge it. What do you think?
Seth Godin vs. Haruki Murakami
I had a dilemma.
Seth Godin said that shipping art is key. Deadlines are important for a writer’s success because they help tame the creative mind.
Haruki Murakami (whom I also love and respect as a person and author) believes that art shouldn’t be given any constraints, and given plenty of room to develop.
I respect both of these authors’ opinions. What’s the correct way of writing, then? But that’s not the correct question to ask.
Instead, I ask: “What fits my personality?”
And I see that:
- I believe in discipline. And I like writing under deadlines because they help me focus my brain.
- But I also believe in quality. I want to never compromise quality and view time as a tool — not as a master.
Hence, for me, the answer is somewhere in between: write under flexible deadlines, and prioritize quality. Never tell myself that “If I had more time, I’d written a better piece/book/article.”
Suddenly, there’s no dilemma. There’s no contradiction.
There’s originality. And that’s what’s important — for writing and life in general.
