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Summary

The article discusses the reasons behind extreme reactions from women when they learn their ex-partner has moved on, and provides strategies for protection against such behavior.

Abstract

The article delves into the phenomenon of women exhibiting intense and sometimes dangerous behavior upon discovering that their ex-partner has entered a new relationship. It uses a personal anecdote of a friend's experience with an ex who began harassing him after he got married. The author explores the psychological underpinnings of such behavior, attributing it to unresolved anger, jealousy, and potential mental health issues. The article suggests that these actions stem from the ex's unhappiness with their own life and a desire to maintain control over their former partner. To protect oneself from such "crazy" exes, the author recommends blocking them and their associates on social media, ignoring their attempts at communication, informing friends and family of the situation, guarding one's emotional state, and considering legal action if necessary. The piece concludes by emphasizing the importance of personal development and maintaining a calm, ex-free life.

Opinions

  • The author believes that an ex's extreme behavior is often rooted in their own unhappiness and unresolved issues.
  • It is suggested that the ex's actions, such as spreading rumors, leaving threatening letters, and stalking, are attempts to regain control or sabotage the former partner's happiness.
  • The article posits that focusing on personal growth can deter an ex's disruptive behavior by showing that you have moved on.
  • Jealousy is seen as a significant motivator for an ex's interference in a new relationship, stemming from insecurity or dissatisfaction with their own life.
  • The author advises that it is crucial not to engage with an ex who is displaying obsessive or harmful behavior, as any attention can fuel their actions.
  • Mental health issues are acknowledged as a potential factor in an ex's extreme reactions, and professional help is recommended for such individuals.
  • The article emphasizes the importance of setting clear boundaries and involving friends, family, and law enforcement if an ex's behavior escalates to stalking or harassment.

Why Women Get Crazy When They Learn That Their Ex Has Moved On

Learn to protect yourself from the crazies.

Photo by Tom Roberts on Unsplash

It’s an ancient story among ex-couples: you ended the relationship, but your former partner’s unresolved feelings over the breakup prevent you from living your new life in peace. Even after multiple phone calls to the police, your furious ex finds a way to continue the drama and threaten your safety.

News headlines are full of tragic stories like this.

I never minded these stories until my good friend confided in me with an issue. His ex is continuously trying to re-enter his life, even though they have been separated for over five years now, and not to mention that their relationship was never serious. It was more of a hookup.

At first, it was just spreading rumours about his wife, leaving anonymous threatening letters, contacting him with requests to meet up or reaching out to his wider family. But just last week, the camera has caught her snooping around the house in the middle of the night.

My friend and his wife are feeling threatened. I used to make jokes about the whole situation, but now it’s not funny anymore. My friend is now filling a restraining order.

How did this all happen?

After all, my friend didn’t have any issue with the ex for the last five years. It all started when he changed his status on Facebook to “married”. Did that trigger the ex?

Now, looking back, he remembers issues there while he was in a “relationship” with the ex. There were red flags all along, but he ignored them. Now he can’t anymore.

I started researching what could make these women go into a crazy mode and become the “dangerous ex”. Were they always like this, or did something make them “snap”?

So, upon my research, I found the main reasons why women go nuts when they find out that the ex has moved on and what you can do to protect yourself from them.

What drives the Crazies?

It Can Be the Unresolved Anger

Some women just become furious when they find out their ex has a new girlfriend. Not just furious, crazy furious. Enraged furious!

They do all sorts of crazy stuff because they see that their ex is happier than they are. They have unresolved issues, and they are quite often miserable with their own lives, so they try even harder to cling to their ex, and this makes their ex want to get even further away, and they end up feeling even more upset.

Especially once you begin focusing on improvements to your own life, the ex will notice. This is when they will try to reestablish contact with you or destroy your happiness.

The absolute best thing to do is to focus on your own personal development to become the best version of yourself. Even if your ex is angry at you, the more attention you give them, the easier it will be for them to try and maintain control over you. Please don’t give them that.

Once you make a shift and begin prioritizing your own well being, becoming the new and improved version of yourself will spark your ex’s attention. They’ll want to know more, so they will gravitate back towards you.

Crazy right?

When They Are So Jealous

Your ex hating your new girlfriend or wife? A prevalent scenario, unfortunately. And it all spans from impeccable jealousy.

Other reasons would be, of course, the ex being very insecure, still having some secret feelings for you, or perhaps their own relationship currently sucks, and they are hoping that one day you would come back to them. There can be many unreasonable excuses why the ex-partner is very jealous of your new life.

The ex could feel like:

· They have lost some control over you that they thought they had

· They can be angry because you are happier without them

· They can be angry because you are in a relationship with someone prettier, smarter, sexier than they are

Misery or Mental Health?

It can be just plain misery. Perhaps your ex hasn’t moved on yet even though they act as they did. They can have serious behaviour problems and are obsessed with you, and are living in the past.

Things get serious if the ex has genuine mental health issues and threatens to hurt themselves. Perhaps they have done that in the past? Just after you have left them?

They could have threatened suicide in the form of gaining control in a situation, which may be used as a tool to keep you from leaving them. This person needs professional help, and you need to get out of the way fast and swift.

What can you do to protect yourself?

Block Them and Their Spies

Contacting an ex will get their hopes up and make them believe you are thinking about them. Every time you like their photos or answer a text, you give the crazies chance to create havoc. Block them, their families and friends from looking at your social media.

Very often, crazies ex has of helpers who are helping them stalk you.

Ignore All the Text, Phone Calls and Emails

The obsessive and crazy won’t stop texting or phoning you. In such cases, the best way to deal is to be determined and ignore all the texts, phone calls, emails. Just don’t engage!

Tell Your Friends And Family What’s Going On

If you have mutual friends with your ex, let them know that you’re trying to keep your distance from them. Don’t say anything negative about her; make sure your friends understand that you shouldn’t be around her. Tell your family what is going on; if the situation escalates, it's always good to make other people aware of the ex who is harassing you.

Guard yourself

Your ex may try to extort you emotionally. Don’t let them control your internal state. Remind yourself that their emotions are not your responsibility. Refuse to acknowledge their attempts to guilt you into doing something you don’t want to.

They want to control your actions with their crazy emotions, so stay strong!

And if things become serious…

If your ex takes things too far, and you would describe the situation as stalking or harassment, you may be in danger. Stalking is also a form of control, as boundaries no longer exist. Then go to the police immediately.

However, hopefully, things won’t escalate to this level!

So whatever way you choose to cope with the situation, remain calm and firm in your decision. In your decision to lead a happy, calm and ex-free life!

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Life Lessons
Life
Relationships
Advice
Women
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