Why Winnie The Pooh Scares Me

Spoiler: He chased me through the mall on my 16th birthday.

What fears do you have? Every person has at least one phobia, an extreme fear, of something, whether it is of spiders or needles or heights. For some fear motivates them, while others become paralyzed with the thought of coming into contact with the dreaded object or concept. What happens when the fear that a person has is of a cartoon character that many people love and is one of the most popular and heavily marketed characters for a global company like the Walt Disney Corporation? The character in question is Winnie the Pooh. This is a story of friendship, chases, laughs, and fear.

It was January 16, 1999, and the weather mild. Some snow coated the roads, but none fell from the sky. There was a chill in the wind, forcing one to huddle under their coats. It was one of those days where breathing heavily into the air makes it appear as if a person is smoking. The sun is high in the blue sky, giving the illusion of a nice day, a day that would soon be shattered by a yellow bear in a red shirt.

A Call To The Mall

A phone call breaks the silence in a house that had seemed to be lifeless just minutes before, though there was a family inside of it. “Get ready we’re going to the mall.” When I answered the phone it was my best friend, Krystal Smith. Excitement had coursed through me, it was the day I was going to celebrate his 18th birthday, and a trip to the mall was the perfect way to start the celebration. Quickly I changed from my standard pajamas of plaid sleep pants and an oversized t-shirt to my usual winter outfit of jeans and a sweatshirt.

In what seemed no time, but was probably 15 minutes, Krystal pulled her white station wagon pulled into the driveway. My younger sister, Sarah, had begged to go to the mall as well; reluctantly I agreed that she could tag along. Krystal had brought her younger sister, Melissa, along as well, so it seemed to make sense to have Sarah there. When everyone was in the car, Krystal pulled out of the driveway. She pointed the car in the direction of the mall and began the journey. On the ride to the mall, laughs pervaded the car, nothing was off-limits. Jokes, anecdotes about grandparents and other friends made the ride seem as if it were next door, instead of nearly 10 miles away. Little did Krystal and I know that in just a short amount of time, a childhood character would become public enemy #1 to us.

Enter The Pooh

Once the car was parked, we entered Kohl’s Department Store at Macomb Mall. It was still early in the day on a Saturday, so there was no one in the store. It was so quiet that the employees of the store looked as if death by boredom would be welcomed. The gang took advantage of the quiet and made more jokes out of everything that crossed their paths, including me dressing up in clothing for women. A yellow colored sundress was held up to me but was quickly decided not to be my color. Our faces were red from laughing, and soon the employees had joined in our laughter as well. Of course, this only encouraged us to broaden our humor and make more people laugh. Soon though that became boring, so we exited the department store and decided to check out what was going on in the rest of the mall. If Krystal and I had known that upon our return, a certain honey-loving Disney character would chase us through the store, we may have done things differently.

Before that happened, we decided to spend some time at the music and entertainment store; “For Your Entertainment”, also known as F.Y.E. In the store we decided to all go in different directions. I went to the new release section and picked up a copy of the debut album from Britney Spears, titled ….Baby One More Time. I had been seriously considering buying it but Krystal objected and held firm when I tried to sway her that it was a necessity. At the moment I had no idea that she had already bought the CD for me for my birthday, which was why she had been so insistent on me not buying it. Her stubbornness when it came to me purchasing that CD, gave me pause and made me suspect that something was going on later in the day. Tossing a frustrated look at my friend, I put the CD back, uttering some foul words under my breath. Krystal, Sarah, and Melissa all shared a look with one another, when they thought I was not watching, little did they know that I actually saw it. Soon thoughts of the exchange in the store would be lost to something far darker, a fear that will last a lifetime.

Chase Through Retail

After a few hours of palling around the mall, we decided to make the trek back to Kohl’s to exit the mall near the car. Krystal and I were tired of walking in circles, while our younger siblings wanted to get home and see what their other friends were doing. Thoughts of what else was going on that day made them quiet and distracted. So it was a surprise to us when we walked into Kohl’s and they were having a promotion with the popular Disney character Winnie the Pooh. Sarah and Melissa, both big fans, wanted to hug and talk to the big yellow bear. While Krystal and I went out of our way to avoid him, at that point it was not that we hated him, rather we were teenagers and too cool to get excited over something so childish. Of course, Sarah and Melissa did not see things this way and were upset by the lack of excitement. They were entranced by that blasted evil bear and did not understand the lack of enthusiasm that we had for him. Krystal and I brushed past that newly formed group, hoping against hope that we would be able to get away from our sisters and Winnie the Pooh.

“Get them!” Our sisters yelled at the character, Krystal and I froze in our places and silently prayed that he would recognize that we just did not want to deal with him. However, Winnie had other ideas, as he looked our way, sizing up the distance that was between us. Clearly being driven by an evil force he began the journey to close the space that separated the three of us. As soon as he began coming towards us, we took off in a sprint. We had no idea where we were going, only that we wanted to put as much space between us and the promotional bear as possible. We ran through the household and shoe sections, hoping that we could find somewhere to hide, something to hide behind. Every time we paused to take a breath and to check to see where Winnie the Pooh was, we realized that he was closing the gap between us.

No Way To Escape

Finally, we saw the ready to wear section; there were plenty of places to hide in that department of the store. We ducked under a rack that was full of long coats that were made of faux fur. Moving one of the coats to the side, just enough to see if the coast was clear, we came out of our hiding place only for Melissa and Sarah to scream “We found them, their over by the coats!” Thinking fast we found another rack, this one full of dresses that were on clearance, and hid behind them. “I could wear one of these dresses until we get out of here,” I volunteered gallantly. Of course, my statement earned an eye roll from Krystal, and we stealthily moved between the racks until we reached the end of the department.

We looked around and did not see our siblings or the dreaded bear, so we took a deep breath and came out of hiding. Krystal and I embraced, grateful that this adventure was over. However, we spoke too soon because once again we were found by the bear and he came running at us in full force, our eyes met but this time we did not move. It was as if someone had put cement in our shoes, he was getting closer and closer to us. We were done for, we were about to deal with the dreaded marketing tool.

Winnie was just about 10 feet from us, our fate was sealed. Out of nowhere, a squeal would save us, “Wiiiinnnniiiiieee!” A precocious child, no older than five years old, jumped out at him and demanded a hug. Krystal and I took advantage of this, making our way past him, looking for our sisters. When we finally found the young ones, we grabbed them and trooped them out to the car, none of us speaking.

A trip to the mall filled with laughs ultimately turned into a nightmare. Being chased through a department store by Winnie the Pooh is not a story that many people get to tell. Another thing that many people do not get to say is that they are afraid of said character. It is one that I tell with great apprehension as 13 years later; the fear is still prevalent in me. When I am shopping I avoid the toy aisle and any Disney display that may contain that dreadful character. Even to this day, when I have to go into Kohl’s department store there is some trepidation, for fear that the wicked Pooh will be there, looking for me. My friends look at me with disbelief and laughter in their eyes when they see how anxious I get around Winnie The Pooh, even if it is a stuffed animal. In less than three hours, a trip to the mall changed the outlook on a character that most children and adults adore.