Why We Should Cringe Away from Being ‘Normal’

Do you want to be just like everyone else?

It happens almost daily. You read a news story about how we can make it back to a state of normality.

Since the entire world shifted priorities and what our lives may mean back in March 2020, it seems that the first thing people are trying to do is get back to ‘normal.’ To what’s generally considered safe.

Whatever that means to them.

The issue I have now and have always had with that term and idea is this -

What is normal anyway?

I’ve thought about this idea since I was a teen — just a little while ago. (In my dreams).

Does my usual look to you like it looks to me? What do you consider normal?

Isn’t normal just a perception of how we live out our lives day in and day out?

As I’ve walked along my path in life, I have heard many people say that something I think or believe isn’t normal. Well, I suppose that if you look at the subject of societal norms, then no. My life is unexpected, and I like it. However, our culture is rules-based, and I choose not to always adhere to them.

See, I live life on my terms. And like all of us, we have our own moral and conscience compass that guides us on our journey. Mine is my own, as is yours. Our experiences shape how we look at the world and our place in it.

Self-awareness is Key.

For instance, I’ve noticed that when I tell people that I have quit three jobs in my life without any idea where I would land, I get shocked stares and the awful, sad shake of the head. Like there was something fundamentally wrong with knowing it was time to leave instead of living the slow, painful death of my hope, energy, and dreams. Each one was left for different reasons — though what it boiled down to was that I was bored. I would find something about the company or my job that made it harder to stay than to go.

I just realized I got that from my dad. He would buy houses in the suburb I grew up in, move our family, fix up the house, and move. Four times in ten years. Wow. He’d get bored with the house and move on to find something that would pique his interest. I learned from my mom that dad bought/sold 14 cars in the first seven years of their marriage.

Did your parents do that? Maybe go through cars quickly? Buy the newest tech gadget out there? Move the furniture around the house to make it look different?

When I look back, I can see the signs that my job shifts weren’t that out of line.

If you are dissatisfied, lean into it. Hug it, get to know it. Decide why you feel the need for change. Most people don’t make a change to do it. Instead, there is an underlying reason for the movement.

Are you happy, content, dissatisfied? Or are you depressed? Why do you want to change something in your world? It’s a common question.

And it has a somewhat uncommon answer.

A friend kept buying cars because something about her current one made it feel broken or dirty. She would get a scratch, hit a curb, and need it fixed, ding it on a pole, etc. And then decide that it wasn’t perfect any longer. When she was sideswiped in her little sports car and sold it the next week, I finally realized the issue. She just wanted new things. Simple. I couldn’t believe that she traded in her dream car instead of getting it fixed and keeping it. But we all have quirks, yes?

So, Normal.

How can you move into your comfortable space? The place that helps you feel settled. We all have different ways of looking at it.

As a teen, I would change my room around every season. Partly as it caused me to clear things out, but mostly because I liked looking at the walls and ceiling from different vantage points. It felt normal to me to move items around.

Each of us finds the way that resonates within our souls. Finding your routine is a journey: one that can be short, but more likely, a lifelong endeavor.

Take stock of your world. What is your normal? Are you happy there?

If so, great! If not, revel in your dissatisfaction. Find your new path.