Summary

The article humorously suggests that tall people are more likely to be successful, wealthy, and have children, based on the author's observations and anecdotal evidence.

Abstract

The author of the article, who works as a CMO in an Estonian startup, shares a humorous and anecdotal exploration of the correlation between height and success. The piece, which is not meant to be taken as scientific fact, details the author's observations of tall individuals consistently being at the top of hierarchical structures, having children, and excelling in various aspects of life. The author notes that in their professional and social interactions, the taller individuals tend to be more successful, wealthy, and influential. This pattern is observed across different settings, including business meetings, social events, and even in the realm of dating. The article cites a study by the American Psychological Association to support the claim that taller individuals earn more over their careers and have dating advantages. While the author acknowledges that the observations are not universally true, they propose that tall people may have certain advantages such as being smarter, happier, and more willing to take risks, which could contribute to their perceived success. The article concludes by suggesting that the author has adopted a strategy of collaborating with taller individuals as a means to increase their own chances of success.

Opinions

The author believes that tall people are disproportionately represented among successful individuals, based on personal experiences and observations.
The author humorously attributes the success of tall people to factors such as intelligence, happiness, and a propensity to take risks.
The article implies that height can influence professional and social success, suggesting that tall individuals may have inherent advantages in life.
The author facetiously recommends seeking out collaborations with tall people as a strategy for personal success, despite recognizing the absurdity of such a strategy.
The piece playfully challenges the reader to consider societal biases towards height, while also acknowledging that life's unfairness is an intractable issue.
The author uses hyperbole and humor to downplay the scientific validity of their observations, emphasizing that the article is meant to be thought-provoking rather than a serious academic treatise.

Why Tall People Always Succeed

Meditation on height.

I was never obsessed with my height (172 cm) until I noticed a repetitive pattern that mixed tall people, kids, money, success, and dating.

It all started in September 2020 when I met a tall Dutch girl (185cm+) while vacationing in Warsaw.

We came to speak about heights so I explained to her my theory of why Dutch people are the tallest in the world. Namely:

They live in a flat country
They drink cow milk
They buy their kids adult bikes that are too big for them so the kids must grow very fast to reach the pedals.

She laughed, but she didn’t understand I wasn’t entirely joking.

For a few years, I had been noticing a pattern about tall people.

It’s not that I could predict what tall people did for a living, but if you told me where they were in the hierarchy, then I could accurately predict their height.

Here’s everything else I have observed about tall people.

1. Tall People Are at the Top of the Hierarchy

I work as a CMO for a small Estonian startup and part of my job is meeting with people that invested in the company to keep them informed of the latest developments.

These people come from everywhere (Estonia, Germany, France, Canada), study different things, have different backgrounds, and are from both genders.

I would say, in fact, that they have nothing in common…except for the fact that they’re all freaking tall, rich, and successful.

Every. Single. One of them.

And so my obsession began.

Sometime later, I joined a private party with a bunch of founders and entrepreneurs organized after a pitching event.

Even though I was having a lot of fun, I left early because my neck hurt from talking to the people that were there.

I noticed that only when they sat on the barstool could we have a discussion that didn’t involve me screaming.

Some weeks later, I attended yet another event with a bunch of founders and investors from the Baltics.

I calculated that the average height at the event must have been 185cm. And the people who came to speak at the event were taller than the people that came to listen.

When my company sent me to a fair to meet bloggers to get them to blog about the business, I was confused because there was no way to know who was a blogger, and who was a visitor.

So I talked to the tallest people in the “blogger lounge” and hit the jackpot every single time.

In fact, the tallest guy there had the biggest blog.

And this has been the repeating pattern everywhere I have been going since forever.

The fancier the event, the taller the people.

The taller the people, the more successful.

2. Tall People Have Kids and People That Have Kids Are Tall People

Before I have kids on my own (if I ever do), I wanted to understand why people in the Western world were no longer having any, and who was having them.

So I went to primary schools at 15h30, in the park on the weekend, and in the kids clothing section to observe the families there* (that kinda sounds creepy now that I see it written.)

While the parents were all tall, I decided to push the investigation further.

Whenever I’d meet a tall person, I’d ask them if they had kids.

And the result of this absolutely-not-scientific experiment was that not only over 90% of people I asked (older than 25) had kids, but the short people I also asked were much more likely not to have any, even when they were in a relationship.

3. Tall People Are Always Successful at Something

When I meet a tall person, I am excited because I know I am about to learn something about success.

I don’t know yet in which realm, but I know that because they’re tall, they are successful at something.

If it’s not apparent at first, then they’re likely to be at the top of their organization.

And when it’s not the case (rare), they’re dating someone that is extremely hot — or they’re hot themselves.

Ok, let’s pause.

Is all of this true?

Well, not all of it is (as you probably understood), but the main idea of this article is true.

Science has actually backed this up. According to the American Psychological Association:

Someone who is 6 feet tall earns, on average, nearly $166,000 more during a 30-year career than someone who is 5 feet 5 inches — even when controlling for gender, age and weight.

And let’s not even speak about dating, where tall people have the upper hand over everyone else (and when they don't date shorter, they date each other).

Why Are Tall People Successful?

Officially, we don’t know.

However, over the years I have spent talking to tall people and observing them, I have noticed three features they have in common.

1. They’re smarter

It’s undeniable, that tall people are smarter.

They get it before others do, and they’re always one step ahead.

You know that feeling when the math teacher asked the class “and so, what does this imply?” after explaining something complicated?

Tall people always know what this implies. They can always go further and deeper.

They understand the implications and consequences of things.

2. They are happier

Because they’re much taller than everybody else, they have the mental advantage of not being physically threatened by other people.

As a result, life is more enjoyable and relaxing because their physical integrity is rarely threatened by all the thugs and weird people that hang out in the street.

And since they’re happier, they are more successful.

3. They take more risks

Because they feel safer, they can afford to take more risk in life, which increases their chances for success.

How so? Their height gives them a feeling of power that short people, constantly surrounded by people taller than them, can’t experience.

This is also why tall people are less likely to suffer from psychological problems like impostor syndrome, bad self-esteem, or phobias.

And this is why they rarely go to therapy. All of my friends that went to therapy are short, and all of my former therapist’s patients were also short.

Coincidence?

In Conclusion

Life is unfair.

This isn’t new, and despite the number of people that have tried (and failed), this isn’t something we can fix.

Instead of moaning about the fact that I am short and that I have to work harder to date and succeed, I decided to turn the tables: I piggyback tall people.

Whenever I contact a journalist, interview somebody, have to choose a supplier, a co-founder, a helper, or whenever I invest in a startup or a company, I make sure the person is tall.

In fact, I always choose the tallest person among the people I buy from or cooperate with.

This is the best way I have found to increase my chances for success.

Time will tell if it works, but I am fairly confident in my strategy.

This article’s purpose is to present an idea in a humorous and thought-provoking way. It shouldn’t be taken at face value.

*I didn’t really do that.

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