Why Spirituality Won’t Make You Happy.

Spirituality won’t fix all your problems.

What were your thoughts upon hearing the phrase “spirituality” for the first time?

Did you have high hopes upon entering the realm of mantras, manifestation, and affirmations… only to discover that spiritual awakening is a rocky and excruciatingly challenging journey?

When I stumbled upon my path of awakening, I was convinced I had found the remedy to all pains. No more grey clouds above my head. No more low-energy mornings.

“I have finally found my armour made of steel”, I thought.

Little did I know that with the beginning of self-discovery, my ups and downs really kicked in.

I expected the spiritual awakening to award me with some kind of superpower. Instead, I uncovered my deepest fears and my eyes were brimming with tears. The clash was unbearable.

Where did I go wrong?

Because I identified spirituality as a state of perfection, I was never satisfied with where I was.

I got used to a constant struggle, putting myself “out there” into the world, chasing various jobs and interviews.

One minute felt like I was on top of my game, and the next thing I knew, it didn’t feel enough. I wanted more. I demanded to do things faster. The result? I was never fully satisfied with where I was at that time.

Still, after all those years of chasing the perfect career and the perfect boyfriend, I did not allow myself to slow down. When I entered the world of meditation and mindfulness, the awakening was my next goal. The hustle culture was still paving the way.

One day, my destructive thoughts took a toll on me.

I felt myself sinking back into my old patterns of limiting beliefs. I felt as if all the effort and my inner work were futile.

In the act of surrender, I sat down in nature, and the one thought found me.

Let it be enough.

The mantra opened my eyes that spirituality is not a quick fix. It is not a fix at all. It is an attitude protecting us from the egoistic mind.

We look for somebody else to tell us we have done a good job. We wait for that perfect profession, the car, the dream house so that we can feel the enoughness running through our veins.

We wait. We chase. We cling to the narrative that Once we …, we will finally be happy. Yet, we fail to realize that as long as we stick to that narrative, we live in anxiety, desperation, and lack.

You cannot become fulfilled thinking about the next stop, the next task off your to-do list.

Chasing for perfection is surrendering your power. And your power lies in enjoying the present moment, being all in.

Spirituality is about accepting the present moment.

It requires humility, compassion, and understanding that whatever arises is perfect.

That every situation carries a meaning.

That we are not all-mighty and we shouldn’t question the greater order. We allow everything to just be.

When you are content with where you are, there is no chase. You are satisfied with being enough and having enough. When such harmonious happiness resides, creativity flows. When you thrive, you can be of service to others.

But first, we need to give ourselves permission to be enough. We need to convince our minds that where we are right now, whether it is a crappy apartment, the middle of a divorce, or an ungrateful career path, we give it permission to be enough. For now.

When you thrive, you can be of service to others.

Your journey has its unique pace. You are heading somewhere purposeful, but right now, it is enough to be where you are.

You are climbing that ladder. Hell, you can jump off the crazy carousel with no explanation necessary. It is also enough.

The key is to allow yourself to be in the process of becoming. The situation may not be ideal, but it is what it is.

Now, you have two options. Rack your brains into stress and frustration about the current situation and create a problem that does not exist. Or, you can choose to soothe yourself with this mantra:

I allow it to be enough.

The phrase helps you to take the focus off the circumstances. You bring the focus back to yourself, to your breathing and your calm state.

It opens the gate to creativity, inspiration, hope, who knows, maybe even gratitude. And gratitude is the ultimate state of the receivership.

Happiness should not feel like a constant struggle.

Stress seems to be the main theme of everyone’s life. We are always on the go. We chase the next project. We are in a rush for the next meeting.

Once we read one book, we are eager to jump onto the next. We buy the dream shoes and immediately need the matching dress.

The promise of reaching that top is an illusion. When you cannot admire the path you are climbing, the view from the top will not suffice either. The thought of the next journey will be looming in the background.

How about if we relax? Simply, let everything be. No stress response in the body. No nervous system shattered.

When you cannot admire the path you are climbing, the view from the top will not suffice either.

Life is meant to be enjoyable. A string of constant battles cannot account for winning the war, as there is none. You are fighting the enemy and your biggest ally in one: your mind.

But, you know, grey clouds are okay. There are still beautiful blue skies above them. It is a gift we can recognize the darkness, observe it and let it pass.

Oh, and I don’t need steel armour. I am human. I am vulnerable, and I accept that.

I allow my life to be enough. I allow my interests to be enough. I allow my pace to be enough.

I can let go of worries. I give myself permission to let go of resistance. I let go of overthinking.

Do you know what I gain by letting go? Peace of mind. Isn’t it a wonderful payoff?

There is nothing outrageous about wanting more as long as you know that where you are is enough, you are enough, and everything you have to offer is enough, for now.

Life will always present you with chances, and open doors to walk through. There will always be more. You are on a journey, and there is no final destination.

There will be cloudless days and ones filled with fears and doubts. Spirituality is about accepting whatever arises.

So, yeah. I was right. Spirituality gave me the superpower of not taking my thoughts seriously. Now, I watch them as they come and go.

Whenever I doubt myself, I know those shitty days will pass.

Whenever I question my worth, I realize the false seduction of social media and the fragility of human nature. I embrace it fully, knowing that this messy image of how my life should be is just a story I can believe or write a better one — the one that will serve me, not break my spirit.

This is spirituality at its best.

Spirituality is the measure of how willing we are to allow Grace — some power greater than ourselves — to enter our lives and guide us along our way.

— Mastin Kipp, author of Daily Love: Growing with Grace,

Thank you for being here, — Kate