Why People Don’t Say “Good Morning” Anymore
It’s early in the morning, I meditated, took a quick shower, and afterward, I basically ran as fast as I could to university. As I sped to class, I could feel my backpack moving from side to side, scratching my back. My face became all moisty from my quick little run, and warmth radiated through my body.
I am 10 minutes late to my university class already, and I still need to get into the elevator, “Hoolddd ittt!” I shout as a kind young woman grabs the elevator door for me. “Hey, good morning,” I say, trying to sound polite. But for some reason, NO ONE in the elevator responds. Everyone seems to be too busy looking at their screens to notice the sweaty 21-year old that barely made it. I just feel a bit awkward and head straight towards my class when the elevator door opens.
Have you ever wondered why things like these happen?
I never gave it much thought. But it seems that the older generation is particularly bothered by this phenomenon.
“People don’t even say hi anymore,” my grandma would say as she stared into the abyss looking completely puzzled. It almost seems like technological advancements have allowed people to sink into another world whenever they please.
After speaking to Nir Eyal in The Rebound Talks Podcast, I realize that the root cause of this WHOLE phenomenon might just be DISCOMFORT.
Whenever people are uncomfortable, they turn into something that will make them forget what is going on in the world around them. Going back to the elevator story, no one said hello because it was a lot more UNCOMFORTABLE and “awkward” to say hello than to just keep looking at their phones. I am sure a lot of us have used our phones to escape a situation where we don’t know anyone around us and fell “uncomfortable.” Some people turn to alcohol, booze, Snapchat, Twitter, Reddit, Instagram, Facebook, fidget spinners (YOU NAME IT).
Nir describes that
“time management is pain management”
One has to learn how to control your “discomfort” so that it doesn’t control you. Discomfort is like a muscle. The more you put yourself in uncomfortable situations and rise to them, the less painful they eventually become. Just think of a time when it might have been unthinkable for you to speak in public or present in class. But, after a couple of presentations, it becomes a walk in the park.
“Seek Discomfort”
This is not only the slogan of a famous Youtube channel. It’s also one of life’s ultimate truths, ANYTHING that you want to achieve you are going to have to put yourself in an uncomfortable situation to do so. I am the Host of The Rebound Talks podcast, and honestly, the first couple of interviews I was shitting my pants. Now, after having conducted over 14 interviews, I have learned to enjoy the process and actually look forward to interviewing people.
Think of all the people that you admire. Let’s talk about Martin Luther King, just imagine having to speak in the Lincoln Memorial in front of hundreds of thousands of people. If given the opportunity, I am sure I wouldn’t even talk in front of 100 of my closest friends. And I am sure Mr. King had a point in his life where he wouldn’t either. NO ONE is born being comfortable doing these things.
I am going to tell you the only thing that you need to be un-fuckable with. To give you a clue, it isn’t money, it isn’t family, and it isn’t becoming a drug lord. It is TYING YOURSELF TO A HIGHER PURPOSE. I am sure Mr. King was able to get up there and give the “I have a dream speech” not because he wasn’t scared, not because he was a great orator, not because he was told to. But, because he had a dream
“That one day, this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men a created equal.”
By tying himself to such a worthy cause, is the way that he and ALL the greats have accomplished feats that might have previously seemed UNIMAGINABLE.
Nir also describes that “Humans are hard-wired to constantly feel discomfort.” If our species had always been comfortable, what would have given us the drive to do something that wasn’t fish and sit by the sand all day? You might be thinking, “I wish I could just do that my whole life.” Or you might fall in love with the idea of retirement and just sitting back and relaxing. But the truth is that you wouldn’t stand more than 6 months in a beach doing the same thing over and over again YOU WOULD GO CRAZY.
Discomfort is what gives us the drive to go out there and conquer the world. So discomfort itself is not bad. It’s your relationship with it, that is. By having a purpose, you are going to be MORE afraid of not pursuing it than doing anything else. This is the ONE SECRET that people have used to talk in front of millions of people, win 10 gold medals, go to the moon, or do anything that might be considered GREAT.
Now, what are you waiting for? Go live out your purpose.
Thank you for your valuable time! If you enjoyed this story you are going to love The Rebound Talks podcast. Hit that follow for weekly blog posts! All the love. All the power.