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Abstract

ople have shared the process in which they have committed fraud. It’s almost as if anything goes when it comes to social media and growing with it makes it hard to understand the value and importance of privacy.After the pandemic I stopped sharing every single thing I was doing and thinking.And although it’s something I’m still trying to figure out, I came to the conclusion that, it’s not a science. You cannot rationalize, overanalyse and calculate your way through life. You are going to mess up. You are going to be embarrassing and you are going to say a little too much or a little too little.And that’s fine.Moreover, I realized that I had already learned how to step away from chronic oversharing. And that was mainly through introspection and getting to know myself. We all have interesting and messy life stories but information about yourself can be valued or used against you in some way.<figure id="dc95"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/1*NzCXPcYpy9_lEHAKKbpvxg.jpeg"><figcaption>Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/es/@anniespratt?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">Annie Spratt</a> in <a href="https://unsplash.com/es/fotos/un-gran-grupo-de-personas-en-una-playa-cMS6wNA7q_I?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">Unsplash</a></figcaption></figure>That’s why I learned to always ask myself, why am I sharing this with this person? I would normally share things about my story to establish a stronger and better friendship. Still, I found myself oversharing in moments of loneliness and confusion, in order to gain a “quick” friend, aka trauma bonding and I wasn’t aware of it.I also learned to ask myself, would I care if this in

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formation was shared with someone else? The answer to this is always very important. Because of course, you never want your business to be aired out but there’s things that would hurt you more if other people knew than others.Then I asked myself, how can I make sure I don’t overstep the boundaries I’ve set with myself around what I share and what I don’t? I know that there’s things that I would never share with anyone at all, not even family so that part was easy. Despite this, I saw that most things lay in a very gray area, especially when it came to meeting new people. Also, you can tell the same story with different levels of depth and detail. So I mastered the art of adapting the same story to different ears.You can say something was complicated without the storytelling, you can learn the skill of avoiding whatever is sensitive to share.On top of that, I decided to make a list! I don’t think most people need to reach this extent but it actually really helped me to have a clear idea of what to actually consider private or sensitive information about my life within those grey areas.I’m honestly still learning about this but the main takeaway is that you need to become mindful about what you share.<blockquote id="cac7">Privacy will help you preserve your energy and you never truly know what intentions do people have, so view not oversharing as an act of self love and protection.</blockquote>And if you feel like you’ve overshared in the past. Don’t feel overly bad about it! Chances are some of the people you have overshared with don’t even remember it like you. Everyone is more focused on themselves than anything else. Simply try to share less in the future.Thank you so much for reading till the end.</article></body>

Why Oversharing is Ruining Your Life

Oversharing has always been a tricky topic for me. And it still is.

As long as I can I remember I have loved sharing stories about myself and asking others about themselves as well. Of course, I always knew what was appropriate for others to know and what wasn’t, but did I?

I was recently listening to Emma Chamberlain’s podcast episode on oversharing and I found myself really relating to what she was saying.

We both think our intention is never to overshare, rather start an interesting and vulnerable conversation. However, we aren’t sure if we are actually doing so. I really went on an overthinking spiral about this, analysing everything I’ve shared about my life and if I’m actually comfortable with it now.

Social media also plays a very important role in this. I got my first instagram account at the age of 12 and looking back at what I used to post I cringe and think why would I ever share that. Universal experience.

Social media really altered the way, at least Gen Z views privacy.

If you open TikTok or reels right now, you’ll find within seconds someone sharing lots of details about their love lives or lack thereof (even sexual ones, yes). Heck, I’ve even seen how people have shared the process in which they have committed fraud. It’s almost as if anything goes when it comes to social media and growing with it makes it hard to understand the value and importance of privacy.

After the pandemic I stopped sharing every single thing I was doing and thinking.

And although it’s something I’m still trying to figure out, I came to the conclusion that, it’s not a science. You cannot rationalize, overanalyse and calculate your way through life. You are going to mess up. You are going to be embarrassing and you are going to say a little too much or a little too little.

And that’s fine.

Moreover, I realized that I had already learned how to step away from chronic oversharing. And that was mainly through introspection and getting to know myself. We all have interesting and messy life stories but information about yourself can be valued or used against you in some way.

That’s why I learned to always ask myself, why am I sharing this with this person? I would normally share things about my story to establish a stronger and better friendship. Still, I found myself oversharing in moments of loneliness and confusion, in order to gain a “quick” friend, aka trauma bonding and I wasn’t aware of it.

I also learned to ask myself, would I care if this information was shared with someone else? The answer to this is always very important. Because of course, you never want your business to be aired out but there’s things that would hurt you more if other people knew than others.

Then I asked myself, how can I make sure I don’t overstep the boundaries I’ve set with myself around what I share and what I don’t? I know that there’s things that I would never share with anyone at all, not even family so that part was easy. Despite this, I saw that most things lay in a very gray area, especially when it came to meeting new people. Also, you can tell the same story with different levels of depth and detail. So I mastered the art of adapting the same story to different ears.

You can say something was complicated without the storytelling, you can learn the skill of avoiding whatever is sensitive to share.

On top of that, I decided to make a list! I don’t think most people need to reach this extent but it actually really helped me to have a clear idea of what to actually consider private or sensitive information about my life within those grey areas.

I’m honestly still learning about this but the main takeaway is that you need to become mindful about what you share.

Privacy will help you preserve your energy and you never truly know what intentions do people have, so view not oversharing as an act of self love and protection.

And if you feel like you’ve overshared in the past. Don’t feel overly bad about it! Chances are some of the people you have overshared with don’t even remember it like you. Everyone is more focused on themselves than anything else. Simply try to share less in the future.

Thank you so much for reading till the end.