Summary

The author reflects on the disparities in opportunities and lifestyle between themselves, living in Nigeria, and their American and European cousins, who enjoy greater freedom and career prospects due to their passports and the societies they live in.

Abstract

The author, a Nigerian, contrasts their life with that of their cousins living in America and Europe, emphasizing the limitations they face in Nigeria, such as restricted travel and fewer career options. The cousins, benefiting from more privileged passports and societies, have the freedom to pursue diverse paths, from ballet to bartending, and can easily travel and live abroad. The author acknowledges the influence of environment on personal development, as stated by Bruce Lipton, and points out that despite facing challenges like racism and gun violence, their cousins have access to a more open market that allows them to monetize their passions, including unconventional careers like being drag queens. The author, while proud of their family's global reach and achievements, grapples with the reality of their own limited opportunities in Nigeria.

Opinions

The author believes that environment plays a crucial role in shaping one's opportunities and career paths, as much as, if not more than, genetics.
There is an underlying sentiment of pride in the family's diverse achievements and global presence, despite the geographical and societal barriers.
The author suggests that systemic issues in Nigeria, such as a lack of support for the arts and limited passport privileges, significantly hinder personal growth and professional success.
The author admires the freedom and options available to their cousins in the West, recognizing the stark contrast with their own reality in Nigeria.
Despite the challenges faced by their American cousins, including racism and gun violence, the author perceives their opportunities as far superior due to the openness of the society they live in.
The author hints at a sense of frustration or resignation about the statistical odds being against them as a Nigerian in Nigeria, questioning what steps to take next.

Why My American Cousins Have A Better Chance At Life Than I

They can be anything they want. Even drag queens. And make money doing what they love

This Photo by Monstera from Pexels describes our family tree right now

The last time my cousins and I were under the same roof was in December 2017. It was such a beautiful event — the one that neither my cousins nor I would ever forget.

One of my aunts, Wanda, lives in America, and I have four American cousins from her. My other aunt, Obi, lives in Germany, and I have a cousin from her and her American husband. And my aunt, Ife, lives in Germany, and I have three cousins from her and her Irish husband.

From the foregoing, you can tell that our family tree has grown into a forest. Metamorphosed beyond the boundaries of continent and race; blurred the lines of white and black.

We are cousins to one another. Family.

As I sat with my cousins in our grandfather’s living room that cold December, I listened to them talking about the things that mattered to them. As a Nigerian living in Nigeria, I could not relate to most.

Eli, my 10-year-old German-Irish-Nigerian cousin, is already a talented ballet dancer and hopes to be a prima ballerina. She takes it seriously. It is her career path.

Oma, my 6-year-old American-Nigerian cousin, is our future Olympic gymnast. Her colorful leotards came with her for the holidays. She even taught me how to do a handstand. Which I still cannot do unsupported.

Jay, my 19-year-old American-Nigerian cousin, had recently moved away from home. To Canada, to be a bartender. To figure things out for himself.

Like Bruce Lipton, Ph.D., rightly said, “Genes load the gun, but the environment pulls the trigger.”

My cousins and I have a connection via genes. However, our triggers run in different directions.

We are a go-getter family. However, this trait will manifest in different ways across continents, from figuring things out on our terms like Jay to working in HR like me.

In all of my “go-getterness,” my Nigerian passport can only get me into a handful of countries, mostly African. My cousins’ passports give them the leverage to move to Canada. To figure life out. Then, move to Paris to see the Eiffel tower.

Being Nigerian in Nigeria is having limited options as a career path. Olympics gymnastics is more a pipe dream than anything.

The Nigerian Ballet audience is a handful. Our theatre is not a valid source of income like Broadway. They don’t care too much for starving artists.

My cousins are the citizens of “the land of the free.” They have access to free Wi-Fi while I have to buy data to run my YouTube channel. Their passports allow them to wake up in Milan today and Sydney tomorrow.

They are exempt from providing proof of English proficiency when applying to international colleges. I am not. But yes, my cousins still have to deal with racism. Colorism. Immense gun violence. Mass shootings.

Michael Thompson was spot on when he said, don’t underestimate the importance of “where.” My cousins exist in an open market, where they can be anything they want. Even drag queens. And make money doing what they love.

Statistics say I have a lower chance. What to do now?

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