Why It’s Okay to Run Away from Our Reality for Sometime

In response to March prompt for CT ‘Life’ column.

“What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or any other resistance, is understanding fear; that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it. We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it.”

— Jiddu Krishnamurti

Right now, as I type these words, a plane just went by, there is construction taking place at the building next to mine, the fan is at full speed, I can feel Mumbai picking up its heat and wondering what to munch in a few hours.

This is what is running through my head and since being conscious also means being aware of the things happening around us, there are also some things going on within.

When I think of the word conscious, I, by default, think of the word alert. Like I can feel my mind alert my body and my heart picking up pace. No, it’s not that I am panicking. It’s just that I think that I must stop and take a breather.

Falling Dominoes

Life is unpredictable. One moment you catch yourself saying, ‘(sigh), my life is getting monotonous. I have my weekend planned, nothing special, just me and my to-do list’ and bam! Your whole life shifts. It’s then when I think to myself, how many things should I be aware of? How many items can I hold on to, and how many things can I complete while navigating through the change.

You may have faced this too when you’re finally settling into a routine you made for yourself, and with one stroke of the wind, all your planning comes tumbling down like dominoes, and you observe telling yourself, ‘What the hell????’.

How does one then sit and take a breather? When you sit to take one, you are overwhelmed with emotions, and so you consciously choose to focus on something else and do something unproductive (like binge-watching or binge-reading when all the while your to-do list haunts you).

Therefore, being not conscious is an escape from reality as you don’t want to be aware of your surrounding fact.

The Never-Ending Pile of Priorities

Okay, maybe I am making sense, or it’s utter nonsense. But think about the time when you want to escape your self-aware state of being because you feel as if you will drown if you choose to tackle it.

However, we know that the way through is by going through what is troubling you the most, so guess who I chose to befriend rather than run away from — consciousness.

As much as my mind and heart refused to deal with what was in front of me, I chose to dive into it headfirst. I decided to sit with the discomfort and figure out a way through, and the first realization that hit me –

It’s okay if I don’t get everything done or I miss something out in the process.

You see, in life, we want to make time for everything. We want to be available for things that matter to us. But other sets of things pile up on top of those things, and you are forced to prioritize those things you assumed you could leave to the last minute.

Let me tell you that you don’t have to feel guilty about doing so. You can change your priorities based on what matters at that moment and do hell with those people and things that assume the worst of you because you chose yourself and what keeps you sane.

Accept the Situation As It Is

Being aware also means tackling those things that keep you afloat amidst a storm. Therefore, in the process, you will lose out on some things that will hurt, but you have no choice but to let go and accept the situation for what it is.

Being aware also means shifting your perspective. Because of the recent changes in my life, my plans just tanked, which got me pissed, and I wanted to scream. But then I told myself (after five deep breaths and some essential advice from my dear friends) that if it didn’t work out as you planned, something better was in store.

Being aware also means you give yourself the pep talk, and your friends give you a pep talk that no matter what the change, YOU WILL FIGURE IT OUT!!!! That’s how their loud yet loving tone calmed me down and made me aware of all the life battles I successfully navigated earlier, and I can do it yet again if I remember that yes, indeed, I will figure it out.

Okay, this just turned out to be a vent session, but the prompt helped me write and get all the troubling thoughts out. I also realized that it’s okay to feel overwhelmed when you finally thought you were settling and then rattled again. It’s okay if you wish to run away from your reality.

Take your time, breathe, and when you are ready, you will accept that the only way through is to face your reality head-on, even though you may lose a few people and things in the process. But remember, it’s only when we shed our (self-doubt, overwhelming, will I ever figure this out) cocoon, will we emerge into an evolved butterfly.

This article is in response to the prompt ‘Have You Experienced a Consciousness Shift Recently?’ in the column ‘Life’ of Coffee Times.

Thank you, Yana Bostongirl and Carmellita, for this thought-provoking prompt. It helped me vent and gain clarity on the things I am running from and to face head-on.

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Thanks so much for your time!