Why Is It Hard To Love Your Twin Flame Unconditionally?
There is a long list of expectations acting as conditions to love them.
Often, when we hear the word unconditional, we think of absolute allowance, removing any possible requirements for someone to be loved by us. This is part of the whole, but something must be considered:
We can only practice unconditional love once we have accepted ourselves entirely and given us the kind of love we aim to provide.
Otherwise, trying to love someone else becomes a battle and, possibly, an instrument for self-sabotage. We might become dangerously permissive or demanding in our endeavors to love without conditions, slowing down our progress and cultivating resentment.
I think unconditional love becomes tricky when we try to remove all conditions as fast as possible to achieve Union instead of loving ourselves unconditionally first.
The reason we experience pain and negativity in this journey has nothing to do with loving our twins deeply — love is never the problem — but trying to give something we don’t have. This is like pretending to relieve two thirsty travelers with an empty cup.
The name of love is then misused to describe an attempted transaction: “I’m giving you something I barely have, and I expect you to do the same.”
Unconditional Love Begins Within
Only when we already have something can we stop seeking it desperately.
Since we can only attract what we are, lack of self-love translates to our twins having difficulty accepting themselves and their feelings. And again, how do you provide something you don’t have?
Ego uses this failed transaction to build up mountains of deception:
Why is this person not giving you back the same way? You have been nothing but “unconditional.”
Ego can be surprisingly versed and resourceful.
Even though every journey is different, there are similarities that explain why physical separation takes place and how it relates to lack of self-love:
One side is desperate to start a fire, while the other is terrified because they have never seen a burning flame before.
The interesting part is that when you go to the home of the one holding the fire, it is dark. They still don’t know how to turn on the lights. Since they can’t be self-reliant, it is impossible to love unconditionally, for they will always expect someone else to lighten up their own temple.
This energetic persecution only stops when we decide to feed our own fire and learn how to use it. Then, you will see that a temple so brightly illuminated can’t be ignored and will guide others to it effortlessly.
Self-love Will Free You From Expectations
If there is something that can become torture, it is waiting every day for our twins to behave how we expect them to. From texting us to expressing verbally how much they love us to declaring they want to spend the rest of their lives with us… There is a long list of expectations acting as conditions to love them.
The thing is, all twin flames love their counterpart madly and want to spend the rest of their lives with them. It is not like you have a choice; the twin soul connection is a beautiful representation of electromagnetic force: no matter what you do, both will be pulled over and over again until you surrender.
It is our twin’s fears and doubts that prevent them from saying or showing their love, as much as our fears and doubts prevent us from believing they do love us. Again, it’s a perfect mirror game that can only be turned around by focusing on self-love first.
Loving ourselves redirects our energy inward. This way, we can build our reality inside out instead of expecting others to shape our world. This self-sufficiency comes with the capacity to provide without conditions, not because we want to be loved back but because we already have what we need.
Practicing self-love will clear your mind and heart so that you can see your own beauty, light, and potential. You will see yourself as your twin sees you.
Dear Soul, I write to spread the energy of Unconditional Love and help you remember the Divine being you are. If you want to dive deeper into these topics, you can find my books here.
We can also connect on a Soul-to-Soul Reading for personalized advice on any of the areas I write about.
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