Why Impulse Shopping Is The Silent Killer To Your Goals
And how I have learned to spend consciously.
I’m a shopaholic. Not the type you see in the movies though — a woman carrying loads of bags after a day out in the mall. That hasn’t happened in years.
Rather, I love to shop online. I like to research good developmental and educational toys I could potentially buy for my son, and I love looking at the different products and comparing them. I don’t spend much at a time and thus, I don’t even consider it real shopping.
My husband rolls his eyes every time a package arrives. What has Sylvia bought now?
If only he knew how many orders I don’t make — but we’ll get to that later.
My purchases are mostly small. But I spent nearly £150 on Amazon goods just in March. And I have virtually nothing to show for it because all the purchases are tiny — a Kindle download, a new phone case, a summer hat for my son, etc.
But what does this have to do with my goals?
Well, firstly, one of my goals is to gain financial freedom and create a passive income through investing in stocks, and eventually property. It’s a long-term goal that, like every goal, is made up of very small steps. That £150 could’ve been invested.
I could’ve saved towards something that made an actual difference in my life, such as a bigger car to accommodate for our growing family (did I mention I’m pregnant? Yay!)
But I often fall victim to a wider issue that I feel is not addressed enough, and that’s impulsive shopping.
Impulse Shopping — The Accepted Addiction
Not to be confused with compulsive shopping — which is when you have an urge to buy something, not for its usefulness or value, but to temporarily relieve a negative tension or feeling, or to change your self-image. Compulsive shopping is destructive and tied to shopping addiction.
When you’re an impulsive shopper, it means you had a sudden urge to buy something you had not previously planned to. For example, seeing an item on offer at the supermarket and buying it even though it wasn’t on your shopping list is an impulse buy.
Impulse shopping is relied upon by most companies. After all, 88.6% of Americans alone have spent a whopping $17.78 billion per year (or $5400 per individual) on impulse buys. That’s a hell of a lot of unplanned purchases.
According to Mario Sano, in his article, “How to increase impulse buying as consumers use in-store shopping as retail therapy to ease anxiety”, impulse buying increased during the pandemic for 21% of supermarket shoppers, to ease off stress and to feel like they were taking back some form of control.
I know I definitely help make up this particular statistic — while I have been unable to spend on getting my nails done or other self-care treatments during the pandemic, chocolate cake and scones with clotted cream and jam magically appeared in my kitchen last year. Many times. Eventually, they appeared on my shopping list!
But how is this relevant?
We Are Taught To Become Addicted to Impulse Shopping
Look again at the statistics above. How many of us keep track of the expenses we did not plan on making? Why is it so easy for us to spend on small, unplanned items?
If it’s not breaking the bank, surely it’s OK, since everyone does it to some degree?
I get that on the surface, this may not seem harmful, especially if it isn’t breaking the bank. But let’s think about the psychology behind that spending. Did the unplanned purchase bring you endless joy? The fact it was unplanned meant it wasn’t needed — you didn’t want it before. Not until you saw it and suddenly had the urge to buy it.
That’s because we are taught to want and accumulate from a young age, but we are not taught to enjoy the things we have. Rather, I believe that as young children, we naturally just enjoy everything thrown at us, and over time, the greed or deprived mentality sets in.
Look at how easy it is to make a baby laugh. Look at how toddlers would rather play with the packaging that a toy came in. Kids know exactly how to enjoy, and as we grow up, we learn so many new things, but we unlearn the skill of simply enjoying ourselves.
That must mean that feeling like we must have is nurtured — by the behaviour of the people around us, and the influence of our surroundings.
That is the masses and those very clever marketers.
We are taught to spend without deliberate joy and purpose. That’s why the feeling you have when you buy something unplanned quickly goes away.
Imagine you could stop wanting and feel complete joy on your own without needing to buy things, or at least cutting out the things you didn’t know you wanted but suddenly did. Imagine you could simply stay focused on your goals and not become distracted by the deals and bargains in front of you.
In order to overcome the feeling of wanting all the time, we need to understand why we want so much.
The Psychology Behind Marketers
Marketers are really good at what they do — which is to convince you to want something you previously didn’t want before.
As Steve Jobs put it,
“Some people say, “Give the customers what they want.” But that’s not my approach. Our job is to figure out what they’re going to want before they do.”
They Study Consumer Behaviour
For example, Netflix hires psychologists to help them understand the behaviour of their audiences in order to boost viewings. I do love Netflix though, their stuff is genuinely good and the amount they produce means that virtually no one will be left without something to appeal to their taste.
They have a “recommended for you” based on your previously b̶i̶n̶g̶e̶d̶ watched stuff, meaning they have gathered data on the types of shows and movies you like to watch. They know what you like and entice you into watching more. And how often are they wrong? I know I’m sold on most of the things they suggest to me.
And I LOVE Netflix — have I said this before? I dare you to tell me it’s not what you consider to be a utility bill.
They Appeal to the Senses
We all know that supermarkets love to display their fruit and veg at the front of the store to appeal to customers visual senses — the different vibrant colours gives an impression of freshness.
The smell of baked bread in supermarkets attracts customers via another sensory route and actually improves the mood. And if you’re a happy shopper, you’re a happy spender. It doesn’t matter what was on your list, you’re happy to do an impulse purchase.
They Inconvenience You to Convenience Themselves
Ikea has you walking through their entire shop in order to maximise the display of their items. Even when this annoys you to the point of abandoning your desire to spend, “there is little point in doing so when the exit route remains the same regardless.”
Don’t forget you still have to walk by the rest of the shop, including the bargain corner, and the restaurant where the food smells delicious, in order to leave. This could just be enough for you to change your mind once more and have you buying more than what you had planned in the first place.
I do love Ikea, though, and I would go there for a day out. I’m their perfect customer. Or rather, they made me into the perfect customer.
They Get You Hooked To Make Companies Rich
The aim of most marketers isn’t to make you broke — it is simply to make the companies rich. They don’t want you to go bankrupt or else you wouldn’t be able to afford their products and services. But they do want to convince you to make room in your spending for them.
So when you are spending 100% of your earnings, and your earnings grow, you will look for things to spend your new money on — because the world has convinced you to max out your earnings. New job, new car. 10% higher salary, bigger TV on a monthly repayment loan.
No matter what, you are left simply wanting more, and you’ll keep spending without realising that this repetitive cycle gets you nowhere.
Simply put — companies know what you want before you want it. Companies have the upper hand because not only are they consumers themselves, but they know how to use that to their advantage. The subjects of their experiments are the masses and they have learned over the years what works.
They not only respond to trends, but they also make them.
How I (Semi) Challenge Wanting
First of all, it is important to note that you are more likely to spend money in a physical shop than you are online. The simple reason is this — when you’re shopping online, you can become easily distracted and you don’t feel as tied to the purchase. This is why there is so much research into cart abandonment and ways for companies to avoid it. So, I try to do most of my shopping online.
How likely is it you will get distracted in a supermarket by a video on IG and forget your shopping cart and walk out?
And how likely is it you will leave the app you’re buying from to answer a quick message, only to forget you were shopping?
Exactly.
According to Dan Shewan, in his article “13 Ways to Combat Shopping Cart Abandonment”,
“Average shopping cart abandonment rates for checkout pages are as high as 87%, and this rises on Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays — as high as almost 90% (Ibid.)”
Amazon tried to overcome this by introducing “one-click” purchasing a few years ago. I used to fall for that one regularly.
But something I have learned is that the pleasure I get from shopping isn’t necessarily at the checkout, after deciding to buy anything, but when things are added to the basket. This means I can easily leave the basket without feeling like I missed a deal or deprived.
The satisfaction is fed — I browse, I get my short term fix when I add the items to the basket, and then I move on, without the expense.
The total value of things I added to my basket but did not buy in the last year is £1258.50 ($1724.53). *Gasp*
Everything I decided not to buy at the time was things I wasn’t originally looking for but saw on offer or they came up when I was looking for something else (namely toys) — impulse buys.
Yes, some items I still ended up buying elsewhere if I found them to be of better value. Yes, some items I ended up buying but in a different colour or size after thinking about them. But these are all items I had an urge to buy and at the last second decided not to — either because I got distracted and forgot, or because I wanted to think about the purchase before making it.
Some items were no longer available and didn’t show the price, so they weren’t added up to the final count.
None of the items are life-changing. None of the things on my list would make a difference to my current circumstances (or my son’s). They would not add value in any way. They certainly wouldn't move me forward on my journey to not wanting so much.
So, why does this matter?
That number above is money I did not spend. If I had consciously set out to save the money I did not spend, I could have invested it and made a return. This is a lesson to all of us — to literally put away the money we think about spending, but decide not to.
I dare you to try it and let me know how much you don’t spend in a 6-month period.
Maximising Use of Products
My husband is not a frivolous spender. He hasn’t bought himself clothes in years. Yes, there has been a pandemic and he’s not needed a new suit for work, but even during the pandemic, loungewear became the latest must-have. But not for him. Actually, what’s hilarious is that his best friends saw the bad loungewear he had been sporting for a year and bought him some new kits for his birthday.
He questions every detail of a purchase. He checks star ratings and reads reviews of both extremes when checking stuff out online. On Amazon, you can check the percentage of consumer ratings, and if the 4 and 5-star ratings combined are below 85%, he doesn’t buy it. Why? Because he needs value for money.
I learned from him to ask myself the following questions when making decisions about a potential purchase — impulsive or planned:
- How useful is this?
- How long will the usefulness last?
- Does it have more than one function?
- Will it bring me joy?
For his 2nd birthday, I looked into various bigger items for my son — a play kitchen, a balance bike, a scooter, or a trampoline. In the end, I got the scooter because his father has one, and I thought it would be cute to see them riding their scooters together one day.
But that wasn’t the only reason. The scooter is long-lasting because it had a replaceable handle that can be adjusted as the child grows.
And the kicker — it came with a seat. My son can choose to sit and push his scooter, or we can take the seat off.
This will last him until he’s 5 or 6, or he reaches the maximum height, bringing him endless joy.
The scooter answered my 4 questions positively, and thus it was a good purchase.
Practising Deliberate Gratitude
Practising gratitude is something we have to work hard at keeping up with especially if we have grown up in the Western world, always wanting.
When you make the deliberate effort to be thankful for everything you have spent money on, you begin to realise just how much abundance there is around you.
When you think about everything you own and have, you may not start to want so much or feel as deprived. I know I have definitely toned down my feelings of greed when I’ve reminded myself just how privileged I am to have what I have.
Similarly, when I buy something I need or want, I literally thank those items and the services I used to buy them from. But I don't just say thanks out loud out of habit and politeness — I genuinely mean it. I literally close my eyes and allow myself to feel this genuine gratitude.
For example, the other day I purchased some new Egyptian cotton bedsheets for our bed. I had wanted new sheets for some time but hadn’t seen any I liked, and I decided I did not want to settle for anything less than amazing. When I saw this set last week, I couldn't resist. I have felt endless joy every night when I’ve climbed into bed and snuggled in them, and genuinely thankful every morning when I’ve made the bed.
Takeaway
We don’t have to keep chasing things all the time. That’s not going to help us achieve our long term goals of success, happiness, and/or financial freedom.
We are taught to want from a young age, and spending time relearning to appreciate what we already have can help us control our tendency to keep wanting. Understanding how we are influenced by marketers and those around us can help to break down what we really want in life from what we think we should want.
Working out ways to control your spending, particularly your impulsive spending, can help to maintain focus on your long-term goals and appreciate the little pleasures you do still indulge in. We can do this by asking ourselves if the items we want to buy are really worth it, and by genuinely expressing gratitude towards what we already have.
Sylvia Emokpae is passionate about self-love and motherhood. See more work like this.
