Why I’ll Never Overcome My Disability

How the Narrative of Overcoming Disabilities Harms Disabled People

While I dove into research for this article, I came across a book about overcoming my own disability — Autism.

The book was co-authored by a therapist and mother of an Autistic child. It seems to be fairly popular, and embraces the controversial applied behaviour analysis or behavioural engineering approach to ‘fixing’ autism.

The first chapter, in its title, cites an autism diagnosis as “The Worst News You’ll Ever Get”.

I don’t think I need to explain why this is hurtful. As an Autistic individual, gaining a diagnosis is a complex process that is different for everyone.

It’s a tangle of validation and grief. An answer to questions I’d had ever since I was a little kid, and a paradigm shift in how I imagined my future.

It certainly isn’t the worst news I’ll ever get.

The Narrative of Overcoming Disability

Our society paints disabled individuals as either victims, doomed by their infliction, or heroes celebrating super-human accomplishments. We’ve all seen social media posts of disabled individuals in the gym, or climbing mountains, with the caption What’s your excuse?

I’m not in any way trying to degrade the achievements of these individuals. I will always celebrate them in every way I can, especially on Twitter. But I do believe that the narrative our mostly-abled society spins around these achievements is harmful to disabled people as a whole.

The idea that disabled people need to ‘overcome’ their disability suggests that the greatest challenge they face is inherent within themselves.

This couldn’t be further from the truth.

The Responsibility of Accessibility

If we celebrate a wheelchair user for ‘overcoming’ their disability by climbing a flight of stairs, we are ignoring the fact that a ramp wasn’t available.

Similarly, when I go shopping with earplugs, I’m not overcoming my autism. I’m dealing with the barrier of the music in most stores being played at a volume beyond what is sensory-friendly.

The idea that disabled people need to ‘overcome’ their disability suggests that the greatest challenge they face is inherent within themselves.

The narrative of overcoming disability shifts the responsibility from society to the individual. If we expect the individual to overcome the barriers society sets before them, we don’t expect society to be accessible.

While it’s important to celebrate the accomplishments of Autistic individuals, we shouldn’t do so without acknowledging that the rate of suicide among Autistics is three times higher than the general population, beginning at ten-years-old.

We shouldn’t ignore that 18.5% of Autistic children have been physically abused, and 16.6% have been sexually abused.

We shouldn’t ignore that only 20% of Autistic individuals will complete a post-secondary education.

We shouldn’t ignore that the employment rate of Autistics is only 14%.

We shouldn’t ignore that the life expectancy of an Autistic individual is only 54-years-old. If they have a learning disability, this drops to 39.5 years.

The narrative of overcoming disability shifts the responsibility from society to the individual.

There is nothing wrong with celebrating disabled individuals, as long as it doesn’t delve into inspiration porn. But the responsibility of defeating barriers shouldn’t fall to disabled people. Society needs to put in the work too.

The Permanence of Disability

Many individuals will never be able to ‘overcome’ their disability — and this doesn’t make them any less valuable.

Their value should never be tied to how abled they appear.

Masking does not mean overcoming. As Corrine Duyvis points out in an amazing article on autism in kidlit, I am not any less Autistic for learning to cope with the barriers I encounter. I am simply appearing more neurotypical.

Our value should never be tied to how abled we appear.

A narrative of recovering from disability is harmful when a disability can not be recovered from.

There are plenty of supposed autism “cures”. Vitamins. A dairy-free, gluten-free diet. Even urine and bleach.

I don’t know about you, but I’m not in any hurry to try those. Especially, because autism can’t be cured.

Expecting someone to overcome something that is such a fundamental part of them can be hurtful. Those expectations can be internalised. Stigma doesn’t have to just come from society. After a lifetime of hearing it, stigma can worm its way into our own voices too.

Like I mentioned previously, being diagnosed with autism was a complicated moment in my life. Sometimes, I get mad at myself when I fail to live up to what I think I should be. But I’m not a victim, nor a savant. And that’s entirely okay.

Our current narrative surrounding disability fails to portray an accurate experience of daily disabled life.

Disabled people shouldn’t have to accomplish miracles to prove their worth. Shared stories should seek to empower disabled communities, not inspire the abled viewer.

Disabled people shouldn’t have to accomplish miracles to prove their worth.

It’s important that disabled individuals control their own narratives, in the media and beyond.

© Caitlin Chisling

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