Satire

Why I Won’t Be Wearing a Mask

Liberty-loving limericks by conscientiously objecting Karens

“It’s certain that I won’t be wearin’ ” Said an outspoken woman named Karen. “I’ll fight for my right To cough all through the night. If I catch it, I guess I’ll be sharin’. ”

“Give me liberty or give me death!” Said an obstinate woman named Beth. “Well, since you’re desirous,” Said a Virus named Cyrus, “I’m glad to oblige. Take a breath.”

“I won’t wear a mask! They look yucky,” Said wannabe-tough guy named Chucky. She said: “Real men eat quiche!” Chuck was on a short leash. He masked-up, ‘cuz he hoped to get lucky.

“Wear a mask? No, that’s just for the masses,” Said a Karen. “It fogs up my glasses — Plus if Democrats do it I always say, ‘screw it!’— They don’t know their heads from their asses.”