Why I Stopped Taking My ADHD Medication

Different things work for different people — this medication didn’t work for me.

Disclaimer: this article is a recounting of a personal experience with the guidance of a mental health professional. Please do not stop taking any medication without consulting a doctor or professional.

A medication usually receives a lot of negative reviews when you feel the side effects for a month before any benefits.

That was my experience with my ADHD medication, Strattera, which I took for about nine weeks before consulting with my provider and quitting.

During the summer, I was diagnosed with ADHD. A provider prescribed me Strattera, a non-stimulant, third-line ADHD drug. I took it for about a month before I felt anything, but throughout the entire experience, I had very strange GI issues, some nausea, and for some reason, while exercising and running, I just couldn’t run fast.

Really slow paces felt really difficult for the entire period I was on Strattera. I thought I just lost it as a runner, or that the heat got to me. I resigned myself that I just wasn’t the same runner I used to be — I had a lot going on, so trying to be fit and competitive running probably were not in alignment.

I think I had some ideas about how transformative an ADHD diagnosis and taking medication would be for my life. I knew it was wrong, but I thought the instant I took medication and started treating the symptoms I had my whole life, I would go Super Saiyan and become a productive superhero. I would never lose an item or forget an item, and my organizational skills would sharpen significantly.

I realized not only was this expected transformation a recipe for disappointment, as well as unrealistic, but I also wondered to what extent I was pathologizing simply being human, or at least normal human behaviors.

First, the medication didn’t work for me

Let me give a disclaimer that for some people, Strattera is a transformative drug. For others, it doesn’t work. The journey to finding the right medication and dosage is never linear or easy — it takes significant calibration.

My provider started me at a really low dose, and after a couple of weeks, she upped the dosage a bit. I did not feel any different, nor did I see any relief in the symptoms. Strattera is a norepinephrine selective reuptake inhibitor (NSRI), which means it takes a month or more for you to feel the benefits. It can take up to eight weeks for the medication to kick in.

But I didn’t feel any of these purported benefits, even though I really did want it to work. The biggest change I noticed is having extremely vivid dreams, but I still struggled with GI issues, occasional nausea, and really struggling on my runs. I felt like I was about to pass out on half the runs I went on. Exercise never felt that bad for me in the past, but I have always been someone who pushed through more physical pain than I should.

One day, during a provider appointment, I told my provider I wanted to stop taking Strattera. It wasn’t ruining my life, but it did make me feel worse. She agreed, and in a season where I have a demanding job and am in law school at the same time, I didn’t want to experiment or calibrate any other medication to treat my symptoms.

I stopped taking the medication one day, and suddenly my GI issues were gone, and I felt like myself running again. I ran a 12-mile race the next day, where I ran faster than I had in a long time. It’s hard to explain how much better I felt, even though it was a very hot day, I felt great and didn’t feel like I was going to pass out anymore.

Since then, I’ve felt just more like myself in a way that’s also hard to explain. It honestly felt like I was putting a handicap on myself for the two months I was on Strattera.

Yes, I still lose items. Yes, I am still forgetful. I still feel like I’m driven by a huge motor, and have periods of both overstimulation and under-stimulation. And yes, I am working on coping with those symptoms too.

Since my ADHD symptoms are very mild, my provider was okay with stopping the medication. I’m not going to say stopping the medication has changed my life, or that I’ll never need medication again, but we agreed it was the right choice for me, and instead of seeking out the ideal medication, maybe it’s time to just work on strategies and be more accepting of who I am and my imperfections as a human being.

On pathologizing normal human behaviors

I think we do have a tendency as a society to pathologize normal human behaviors. I will refrain from any broad, sweeping statements about any one person’s individual condition or symptoms, but I remember fidgeting a lot in math class as a kid because I felt like it was too easy.

Today, I lose items because I try to move too fast, and I struggle to give attention to tasks that don’t interest me because, well, I’m just not interested.

As the demands of my world focus more on being able to concentrate on reading, doing well on tests, and being able to sit at a desk and computer for ten hours at a time and work, it’s natural, as a human being, to resist a bit and need to move around.

I don’t think my personal diagnosis is bogus. I do have a lot of ADHD symptoms. Perhaps Strattera just wasn’t the drug for me, and perhaps I would benefit from a stimulant.

For now, I am refraining from any drastic changes in my daily routine in a season of busyness. I’m glad to just feel like myself again, and the biggest part of that is being able to exercise without feeling nauseous and not feeling like I’m constantly restraining myself.

As distinct individuals, different things work for different people. And this particular medication just didn’t work for me.