Summary

The author of the article describes a personal journey from shame about emotional displays to embracing tears as a sign of love and genuine connection in the face of loss.

Abstract

The article "Why I No Longer Hide My Tears" delves into the author's struggle with the societal expectation to suppress emotions, particularly in the context of grief. Initially feeling alienated by her inability to control her tears during moments of loss, the author recounts a transformative experience at her uncle's funeral. A comment made by her cousin, though initially upsetting, led to a realization that her tears were a manifestation of her deep love and care for her family. This epiphany marked a shift in her perspective, allowing her to accept her emotional responses as a strength rather than a weakness. The author now views her tears as a testament to her authenticity and the depth of her relationships, finding peace in vulnerability. The article encourages readers to embrace their emotions openly, suggesting that this authenticity is crucial for forming genuine relationships.

Opinions

The author believes that crying is a natural and acceptable response to grief, not a sign of weakness.
She expresses that hiding emotions can prevent genuine connections and authentic relationships.
The author values authenticity and vulnerability as essential components of love and emotional health.
She suggests that societal norms often pressure individuals to suppress their emotions, particularly in the context of death and loss.
The author emphasizes the importance of embracing one's true self and emotions, even if it goes against the perceived stoicism of those around us.
She reflects on the idea that the depth of one's grief is proportional to the love felt for the person who has passed away.

Why I No Longer Hide My Tears

Discovering the Power of Embracing Your Emotions and the True Meaning of Love in the Face of Death

Losing someone you love is never easy. It’s a pain that cuts deep into your heart and never truly fades away.

Death is a natural part of life, yet it’s something that I have always struggled to come to terms with. I am a crier, with ugly tears that flow freely and uncontrollably. Whether it’s a character dying in a TV show or a news article about a stranger’s tragedy, I cannot help but feel the weight of their loss.

For years, I was ashamed and embarrassed by my emotional response to death. I would see others around me, seemingly keeping it together, and wonder how they were able to do so. I felt like an alien, an outsider in a world where it seemed like everyone else had a better grip on their emotions. I longed to be able to hold back my tears, to appear strong — like those around me.

But then, something happened that changed my perspective. It was at my uncle’s funeral. I was a mess. My tears flowed like a raging waterfall as I struggled to come to terms with the fact that he was gone. My mom had lost her brother, whom she was so close to, and my heart broke for her.

In an attempt to lighten the mood, my cousin made a comment that struck me to my core. “You’re crying like it was your dad who died!”

At that moment, my initial reaction was anger. How could she make such a callous joke at a time like this? But then, as I wiped away my tears, I realized something.

I was crying because I cared.

My emotions were a reflection of the love I had for my uncle and my mom and the pain I felt at the loss. If the opposite attitude was to appear strong and unemotional, I realized that was not something I wanted to embrace.

Why should I hide my emotions or feel ashamed for caring deeply?

Why should I try to hold back my tears when they are a natural response to loss?

I realized that my tears were not a sign of weakness, but a testament of love and care for others.

This experience was a pivotal life moment.

From that day on, I made a conscious effort to embrace my emotions and not be afraid to show them.

I no longer felt like an outsider, but a person who was unafraid to let others know how much I cared. And in doing so, I found a sense of peace and acceptance in the face of death — along with the tears that rain down my face in the process.

Losing my uncle was a heartbreaking experience, but it also taught me a valuable lesson. I learned that it’s okay to cry, to let your emotions show, and to not be afraid of being vulnerable.

Death may be a part of life, but so is love. And I will always choose to embrace my emotions, even if it means having a few ugly tears along the way.

The sharing of this story was inspired by Gusto Reader and their piece on authenticity:

Authenticity: A Testament For Forming Genuine Relationships

A short article emphasizing the importance of being authentic

medium.com

Another article that relates to my experience is described by hurea as they explore emotions by embracing one’s true self:

Voyage into the Heart

Verifying emotions — the essence of seeking validation, having a void in life, and the power of being vulnerable

medium.com

About the Author: Mom first in everything I do. Follow more about my parenting perspectives with PARENTS PEN, a Medium Publication. Career in local government. Writer somewhere in the mix. Editor for The Shortform on Medium. Join me and gain access to unlimited stories (using this link, I earn a small commission at no additional cost to you). Thank you for your support and for helping turn my dream into a reality!