Why I Loved Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People”

Summary

The author shares their transformative experience with Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People," which led to personal growth and a preference for collective development.

Abstract

Initially skeptical about self-help books, the author found Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" to be a pivotal read that significantly impacted their life. The book's advice on avoiding unnecessary criticism and focusing on positive energy led to a shift in the author's mindset, influencing both their personal and professional life. Embracing the book's principles, the author quit toxic work environments, prioritized helping others, and became a more effective leader. This experience altered their perspective on self-help literature, recognizing it as a valuable source of actionable advice and personal growth.

Opinions

The author initially found self-help books boring but later appreciated their value.
A specific passage in Carnegie's book about not wasting energy on judging others resonated deeply with the author.
The realization that negative thoughts were draining led to a conscious decision to seek positive influences.
The author believes in the collective growth of a team, emphasizing that a team's strength is tied to its weakest member.
The book's advice helped the author become a better person and leader by focusing on helping others without expecting immediate returns.
The author now views self-help books as a cost-effective way to gain valuable insights and experiences from others.
The author's favorite books have evolved over time, reflecting personal growth and changing tastes.

And why I find self-help books so useful

How to Win Friends and Influence People was the first self-help book that I had read. I found the first half of the book very boring; I did not resonate with this type of lecture at first. But then, something happened, I felt some click.

While I was reading bored, a passage impressed me and made me reflect on my life. The author wrote that the people that judge and criticize others uselessly waste a lot of energy. And Mr. Carnegie was right about this one.

That was a crucial moment and influenced both my career and my personal life. I understood that I was using a lot of energy on negative things, which made me feel miserable all the time.

That was the moment I decided I wanted to become better. Soon, I quit all the toxic groups at work and started to stay around positive people. This little change helped me be happier and focus on my personal evolution.

The author also wrote in the book that you are the best version of yourself when you are good enough to help others evolve along with you. A team is as good as her weakest member. This principle still drives me today; I always prefer collective over personal development.

The book helped me become a better person and leader. Back then, my responsibility was to handle and manage the team from work, and my mindset shift helped me have better results.

At first, I found self-help books useless, but after reading Mr. Carnegie’s work, I understood something. This lecture often provides actionable advice, and if we manage to adopt a single new idea, we won.

The book helped me open my mind and made me focus more on myself to help others. The supreme form of selfishness is to become the person capable of helping everybody without asking anything in return. Rewards will come, but not in a direct way. The Universe works in miraculous ways. And it looks like it follows us on Medium.

I always find it difficult to answer when I am asked which is my favorite book. I like a lot of books, and I always replace my favorite book with next-favorite. I remember my first fav book was Homer’s Iliad, but as I grew, I had replaced it with The last of the Mohicans.

As I evolve and change, my favorite things and my tastes change too, but that’s totally okay.

I think self-help books are a cheap and fast way of learning things. It’s like borrowing valuable experiences from others, almost for free.

Do you like self-help books? Why? Why not?