What We Can Learn from Bootcamp Mindset

Why Giving Up Is Not An Option

Don’t be fooled by the illusion of comfort and safety.

The difference between those who make it and those who do not make it is a simple idea: Giving up is not an option.

For some people, this sounds like one of those self-optimization mantras that only Navy Seals and those with mind mastery are capable of. Think again. For millions, if not billions, of people around the world, life circumstances are such that giving up simply is no option. You give up, you die.

Millions of women who raise their children in abject poverty, in violent environments, without support at best and under constant threat of violence at worst, cannot afford to simply give up. If they do, they die and their children with them.

What about us, then? Our Western society of comfort and security creates the illusion that giving up has become an option.

I cannot go running because it is raining outside. This relationship is so much work; I’m out. I cannot progress at work because my boss is a narcissist. I want to make a living as a writer but it is too hard.

We believe that we no longer lose anything if we throw in the towel. There are so many other options.

We no longer die, do we? Well, my friend, we do.

We remain seated on our comfy couch, watching Netflix, popping Prozac, and posting our better moments on social media, and we die. Our souls die long before our bodies wither away.

You Can Do Anything. Really?

At the same time, the self-development industry tells us that we can do anything if only we believe it. Manifest it. Visualize. We pay a few hundred bucks to learn how to believe, manifest, and visualize the heck out of the universe. Until we get frustrated and give up. Because once again we missed the point.

No, we cannot do anything we want. Yes, there are limits. A whale cannot fly. A rabbit cannot fight the lion. Even if he was still alive, Stephen Hawking could never beat Roger Gracie in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. He knew that and was smart enough to focus on and develop his potential.

Every one of us has a huge potential. Our very own, very unique potential. No person’s potential is identical to another. It’s like your fingerprint. Unique, vast, perfect.

The Competition Trap

Our problem is that we are still trapped in the mindset of competition and value attachment. We still believe that life is about being better, faster, higher, and more enlightened than the Joneses. With almost eight billion Joneses living on this planet, chances are we will always find the one that does “it” better, faster, and more successfully than we do. So, we give up.

The thing is, despite the comfort and security our lifestyle seems to grant us, giving up is not an option for us either. Never been. Instead, our lifestyle demands we feel deep gratitude for everything we have, exploring our possibilities, and pushing our very own limits over and over and over again.

Feel the limits, feel the pain, feel the challenge, push a bit more, be scared, do it anyways, and experience the thrill of expansion, resistance, and growth.

Have You Reached Your Limit?

If there is even the slightest chance that you could live a better life, go for it. Reaching your limit is not an invitation to stop right there. It is an invitation to push it, to move beyond.

Find out what makes your heartbeat. What gets you excited and scared at the same time? It might not be what your friends talk about. It might not be what your spouse or parents think is best for you. You might have to take a very hard look at what you believe you should be better at and ask yourself if that is really, truly your own passion or somebody else’s.

Once you find it, bite and don’t let go. Do what you have to do. Feel what you have to feel. Maybe you have to go a bit slower at times, maybe — probably — it takes hard work, sacrifice, willingness to make a fool out of yourself, to face shame, rejection, and setbacks.

You may find out a few things about yourself and others that you’d rather not know. That’s okay. Cry if you must. Kick a sandbag or a pillow. Yell at your pot plant. Reach out to someone who’s got your back. And do not ever give up.

That is being alive.