Why do some folks seem a bit “off”?
How I’ve started to deal with them
Some people just seem a bit strange. I encounter people daily that seem like something just doesn’t click. There’s nothing that stands out, but every interaction is awkward and forced.
You try to understand why, and maybe it seems like they’re “too nice”. This isn’t too far from the truth.
However, there’s a deeper reason behind their niceness. And it’s definitely not nice at all.
They’re hiding something
I work 40 hours a week. I know most of the people at my job, and they are courteous, and seem pretty “normal”. At the same time, I’m tired of the fake smiles and compliments of some people.
Why are we always going throughout our lives pretending everything is okay?
“How are you?” Good
“Oh, that’s good, how are things with you and your girl?” Good
“Oh hey, how are you doing, haven’t seen you in a while.” Oh, I’ve been well, how are you?
It’s not the content, but the tone that doesn’t seem right. It’s forced and inauthentic.
I feel obligated to answer with the most mundane, boring response to avoid upsetting anyone. God forbid I actually tell someone how I actually feel. I’m not always okay, sometimes I’m anxious, tired, or not happy about being here at work.
I see the two-faced behavior of some people around me who act too nicely but are hiding something. There’s just that look in their eyes. I see it. You notice it in some people too. Something doesn’t seem right.
It’s quite unpleasant and annoying to have to interact with these people.
Sometimes I just want to say “Cut the crap. What do you want?”
Shouldn’t we be more critical of the people-pleasers? They’re like parasites that worm in with fake compliments in the hope that we’ll like them. Meanwhile, they’re thinking about how’s the best way we can be of use to them.
That mask of yours does nothing but make me question all of your motives. It’s dishonest. Dishonest people are disgusting. I don’t know what exactly it is you’re hiding, but I don’t want anything to do with it.
Not everyone I know is like this. There are plenty of cool, down-to-earth people I like being around. It’s the weirdos who act way too out of character that makes me skeptical of them.
Authenticity drives connection
Dishonesty makes it impossible to connect with someone. You obviously can’t form a genuine relationship with another human being when you are questioning their motives all the time. The fake front is a defense mechanism that all of us adopted a long time ago.
We’re wearing masks and pretending. The worst offenders compensate too much but let their true nature slip from time to time.
It’s difficult to be direct with the fakers because it doesn’t resonate with them.
Everything has to be sugar-coated, politically correct, or positive. I want to be real, yet at the same time, I feel fake for playing their little game.
It’ll get deflected with some BS response filled with toxic positivity. It makes you doubt whether or not your feelings or opinions are even valid.
How can you really connect with someone like this? Are they really worth our time to interact with?
We’re naturally drawn to authenticity. It makes life exciting, interesting, and worth it. When you’re stuck with a sniveling, annoying people-pleaser they are draining the energy straight from you.
Wouldn’t it be better to be a bit more authentic? Maybe some people may not like the real you, but either way, we all judge each other.
Maybe just ignore them
In my experience, the “nicest, most pleasant people” will always be hiding something.
Except we’re all hiding something about ourselves. It’s human nature. Some individuals compensate too much, and it becomes soul-draining to be around them.
I would recommend just avoiding these people or ignoring them completely (if it’s possible). Sometimes I find it funny to even troll these kinds of people with jokes that just go way past them.
Whether or not you follow this advice, just know that you don’t have to keep second-guessing yourself when dealing with these types.