Why Do Grandparents Move to be Close to Their Grandkids
Why not enjoy freedom from kids in their final 30 years
I was talking to a couple who had moved from Alberta, Canada back to Ontario, Canada. About twenty years prior they had moved to Alberta because their first grandchild had been born and they wanted to be near her. In the twenty years that they had been there, two more were born.
Now the grandchildren had “outgrown” them and were focused on young adult and teenage things. Another of their children had just given birth in Ontario, so they returned home to relevance again.
Their story is not unique. Grandparents do this all the time. Couples will leave the life they’ve built; relationships forged through the years; church families; homes they raised their children in; restaurants they’ve enjoyed, etc, and cross vast lands to be with their grandchildren.
Why?
Well, I’ll tell you why we’re doing it.
Yes, in one month my wife and I will be moving from Ontario to Nova Scotia to be near our two grandkids, Dakota, 3, and Rosalie, 3 months of age. Our house is sold and we’ve bought one in NS. The closing dates will soon be upon us and off we go.
Here’s why we’re doing it.
1. They’re cute. Seeing them on FaceTime doesn’t cut it. Short two-week visits once a year don’t cut it. We want to pinch their cheeks, squeeze their little bodies and watch them grow up.
2. It’s the next phase. We’ve done the Ma and Pa. Now it’s time for Nana and Tata. There’s nothing better than being called that by little voices. And we’re not raising them. We’re spoiling them. We’ve earned that right.
3. It’s important for them. Until I was 10 years old, I lived with my grandmother. Those times were invaluable to my upbringing. Her stories about her life, struggles and triumphs were important in forming my self-esteem, instilling self-worth and showing me where I’m from and who I am.
4. We have something to teach them. We are their sages. We have stories to tell. Yes, we can tell them through a screen but we can’t remember everything. Sometimes it’s an event or something you see that triggers a memory and out comes a story. We can also bring a different perspective to a problem they’re trying to resolve.
5. We can give grandkids a connection to the past. It’s one thing to learn about it in a textbook. It’s another to hear it directly from those who lived it. Their parents can tell them about smartphones. We can tell about party line dial phones. My grandkids will be raised in Canada. I grew up in Africa. They will know about Africa from me and my experiences. Hopefully, one day they will want to go and see it for themselves. My kids have.
6. It’ll be good for us. We’re empty-nesters now. We’re in our mid-50s and have a lot of vim and vigour and energetic grandchildren will keep that going. They add to our list of things to live for besides each other, especially when we become the primary babysitters or daycare providers. To that point, it’ll be good for their parents too.
We’re looking forward to our new adventure. It will be a big change for us with having to make new friends, find a new church, create new relationships, etc. That can be tough to do as you get older and are set in your ways.
But it will be worth it. And when these grandkids don’t find us interesting anymore, we’ll move to the next ones.
If we still can.