Why Do Anti-LGBTQIA+ People Care So Much?

Seriously, why do you put so much energy into this?

A while ago, I was reading an article about the Republican Party giving up the culture war around same-sex marriage, which was interesting, to say the least. It talked about how all but the evangelical Christian wing of the party seem to think that same-sex marriage is just fine and that Republicans should move on to other issues.

Unfortunately, those issues pertain to trans folx and stripping them of their rights. All of the assorted bathroom bills and anti-trans youth sports stuff going on make me very upset, and the fact that Republicans have pivoted to this particular aspect of anti-LGBTQIA+ rhetoric is incredibly frustrating.

The thing that confuses me is this: why do they care so much? Why is this an issue at all? Why has the party and its bigoted members driven this hate-filled campaign against queer folx for so long? How does any of this affect you in any way?

Let’s go through a few of the arguments.

Trans women using women’s restrooms are a threat to “real” women.

Trans women who want to use a women’s restroom just want to do so in peace. They’re not going to take pictures of other women or masturbate to the other women around them; they just want to use the facilities like everyone else.

“But they’re just a man in a dress!” you exclaim. First off, no, they’re not, they’re a woman as much as any other woman who is using the restroom. Trans women are women, and none of your griping will change that.

Second off, any man who puts on a dress and demands to use the women’s restroom to creep on women is already committing a crime by, you know, creeping on women. The aforementioned acts of taking pictures and masturbating are both illegal already; why try to pin them on women who, as I said, just want to use the bathroom in peace?

Third, none of this has been an issue for gay men and lesbian women, both of whom use their respective public bathrooms millions of times a day without resorting to any of that stuff. If you can trust a lesbian or bi woman to use the restroom without creeping on the women there, why waste so much energy on trans women who may not even be attracted to women at all?

Same-sex marriage is an affront to marriage everywhere.

Why? What does a same-sex couple getting married do to strip your marriage of any legitimacy or decency? What did they ever do to you? Why does their marriage invalidate yours? More importantly, why isn’t divorce an affront to marriage everywhere? (Hint: it’s not.) Why do same-sex weddings offend you but ridiculous celebrity marriages and divorces don’t?

Is it because same-sex marriage is an affront to God? Well, 70% of Americans support it, which is conveniently the same percentage of people who identify as Christian in America. I’d guess that there is plenty of overlap there, so that would mean that quite a few Christians would disagree with you there.

Of course, you can cite your scriptures that say as much, but that cuts both ways, as many people have dissected and analyzed biblical texts and come to different conclusions. This says nothing of the many, many different translations of the Bible over the past centuries which have resulted in numerous mistranslations, errors, and forgeries in the text. Meanings have been changed throughout the centuries to cater to different leaders and sects, some of which result in drastic changes to the original meanings of the scripture.

The fact of the matter is that Jesus said to love your fellow man, and repressing the rights of your fellow man doesn’t feel very loving and Christ-like to me.

Those darn gay people will turn our kids gay!

I hate to tell you, but the number one producer of queer kids is straight parents.

That may be a bit facetious, but you can’t make someone gay any more than you can make them straight. Your kids are born how they’re born, and no amount of griping, yelling, or kicking them out will make them any less gay, trans, or any other letter in the spectrum. What it will do is give them PTSD and raise their chances of self-harm and suicide.

Honestly, I don’t know what else to say here. We’re all born wired one way or another, and there is little that can change that. Very often, what seems like a shift in attraction is really just people figuring themselves out, and our understanding of the LGBTQIA+ spectrum has changed so much in the past few years that it looks totally different than a decade ago.

While a person may have identified as gay ten years ago, they may identify as bisexual/demisexual, and a person who might have felt like trans was the best descriptor might now feel they better fit as nonbinary. Indecision might look like someone is just going with what’s popular, but it’s really just a product of shifting language. We have so many more words to describe this weird thing that is the human condition, and that’s a great thing!

So, why do these people care?

Honestly, I don’t really have a good explanation. Considering that the vast majority of anti-queer people belong to the religious right, I suspect that a lot of it is the bigotry and hatred that major right-wing figures like to stir up to feed their outrage machine. So much of right-wing politics relies on there being an “other” as an enemy — whether queer folx, immigrants, BIPOC, or whatever — that an already-marginalized group is easy pickings.

And, as an upshot of that, they are outraged that queerness is getting more representation and more acceptance. Gay marriage is legal, and while it is still threatened by a very conservative Supreme Court, it gains more acceptance as time goes on. The media is increasingly representative of queerness (among other “woke” things) and that makes them angry.

The fact of the matter is, queerness is not going away. That around 20% of Gen Z identifies on the LGBTQIA+ spectrum and America as a whole is approaching 10% LGBTQIA+ is emblematic of this. This terrifies the right-wing authoritarian preachers who scream bigotry from their superchurch pulpits and the various hate groups, so they push more and more dirty tactics to shove those darned queers back in the closet.

I may not have a good understanding of why so many, particularly on the right, care so deeply about shoving queerness back into the closet, but I understand bigotry when I see it. And, as much as that bigotry makes me angry, I have bad news for these people: queerness is here to stay. It’s always been here, it will always be here, and no amount of kicking or screaming will make it go away.

Regan tried his best to wipe out gayness by letting AIDS run unchecked, and even that failed. Do you really think a bunch of racist bigots in military gear can stop this movement? So many queer folx fought so hard for recognition, for representation, and for the right to march during Pride month that they’re not going quietly.

None of this would’ve been possible were it not for a whole generation of elder queer folx that fought tooth and nail for this. Stonewall was a riot, after all, and younger generations are starting to learn that history thanks to the internet and are beginning to understand that gay rights were an honest-to-goodness fight.

You are welcome to cry and whine and yell slurs — we have freedom of speech, after all, so that’s within your rights as an American. However, know this: the people who believe what you do are getting older and dying out, and history will not look kindly on you and yours. Progress marches ever forward, and no amount of regressive politics and hatred will stop it. You might be better off dedicating your energy to more worthy causes, like helping feed the hungry, clothe the naked, and house the homeless.

You know, as Jesus did?

Happy Pride, everyone.

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