IDIOCRACY IN AMERICA

Why Are There So Many Nutty People in This Country, and Why Does One of Them Have to Be My Mom?

Completely out of ideas — Part one

When I read Walter Rhein’s latest political piece, it made me think of a letter I wrote to my QAnon mother at the end of 2020. I thought it might be an interesting post. Walter’s excellent piece deals with the irrationality of Trump supporters and conservative bias in the media, and these are obviously some of the problems I have dealt with in regard to my mother.

What follows is not the letter I was thinking of. After looking at the letter in question, I realized there were references that would not make sense unless I shared what led up to it. Also, the communications that led up to it are interesting in their own right. If I were to publish the whole communication as one piece it would be way too long for Medium, so I’ll publish it in two parts.

For those of you who don’t know, my 80-year-old mother is a New Age Hippy — turned QAnon believer. My sisters and I have tried every approach possible to get through to her, but her reaction has been to isolate herself more and more. We have all decided to simply ignore anything crazy or political she says from here on out. Otherwise, we risk complete estrangement from her.

Soon after the 2020 election, my mom sent everyone she knows a video about “The Post-Election Sting,” which was basically a rant from some lunatic about the “Democrats stealing the election.” After years of deleting these types of messages unopened and unacknowledged, my sister Gretchen, my aunt Merrillynn, and myself, all responded after receiving the video. We had not spoken to one another beforehand, so our actions were completely independent of one another.

My response was to send Mom a simple email asking her to stop sending me this type of material, but Gretchen and Merrillynn hit ‘reply to all,’ sending their responses to everyone who received the video from my mother. This set off some angry replies from Mom’s nutty Internet friends.

Gretchen’s response was a link to a NY Times article about why people believe conspiracy theories and Merrillynn’s response essentially said that Mom’s attached video was “DARK and bat-shit crazy.”

When I asked my mother to stop sending me anything political, she simply asked “WHY?” This was my response exactly as I sent it on November 21, 2020.

Let me start by saying that in the interest of keeping the peace, I usually avoid talking to you about things that might be inflammatory. I would think it would be obvious to you that I (not to mention my sisters) am not going to react well to anything political you send. Knowing how upset you get when any of us argue with you about this stuff, I truly don’t understand why you continue to send it. It seems antagonistic to me. I hoped that by asking you to stop sending me this crap, I could avoid the irritation, disappointment, and anger it makes me feel, without getting into a whole thing with you. But since you asked why, I will tell you.

From as far back as I can remember, you have believed in kooky stuff. There is nothing new there. Most of the time your beliefs are harmless. It doesn’t bother me that you believe in aliens, yetis, and the ascension. None of that stuff is harmful. When you and many other gullible, kooky people abandon aliens and put all of your energy into supporting the Trump administration, it suddenly becomes very harmful. In 2016 you supported Jill Stein. All of her ideals were in direct opposition to everything Trump stands for. In less than four years, you have gone from supporting someone who was all about civil rights and taking steps to correct the environment, to hitching your wagon to a greedy, self-serving bigot. It’s insane. You have never particularly followed politics before, which makes the whole thing even more confusing.

I don’t have to tell you that you have a bad history with cults. My sisters and I have the emotional scars to prove it. Everything the Trump administration is doing has all of the earmarks of a cult. He is sowing doubt and mistrust about anything outside of the beliefs of the administration. He is always right, even when he is lying through his teeth, and anyone who questions his “truths” is berated and called a liar. He is alienating this country from our longstanding allies around the world, and encouraging division between his followers and people that don’t love and agree with him. These are the same tactics used by cult leaders to separate members from their families and friends. At the moment, he is still soliciting money from his followers through the campaign fund even though the campaign is over. The money is supposed to fund his flimsy lawsuits, but the majority of those funds are actually going toward paying off campaign debt. It says so in small print right on the donation page. He is trying to fleece his followers for as long as he can, just like a cult leader.

The number one reason why I find all of this upsetting has to do with your many positive characteristics. You always taught us and led by example, to be kind, accepting, and understanding towards people from all races and all walks of life. I have never seen you behave in an unfriendly manner. You always embraced the hippy movement’s philosophy of respecting the Earth along with all of the creatures in it. The Trump administration could not be farther from these values. The racist and elitist crap that has been spewed from this administration is inexcusable, and the environmental protections that have been stripped to line the pockets of the ultra-rich are deplorable. I won’t go into details, because you won’t believe it any more than I believe what you say about it. I have always accepted your kooky nature and beliefs, but to have you do a 180 and align yourself with a bunch of conservative, hateful, racist, sexist, and all-around rich assholes is way too much.

I love you very much, but I can’t continue to keep my mouth shut about the political stuff. We have plenty of other things in common, so let’s just share stuff about plants and animals.

Mom’s response was simply,

“Thanks for your honest answer. I will stick to plants and animals from now on!”

At that point, she had taken me off the original email thread that spawned this discussion but was bothered that Gretchen and I didn’t get to read an elaborate reply written by one of my Uncle Alan’s old friends. The friend’s name was Mike, and Mom had been in regular contact with him ever since she learned how similar their beliefs were.

Mike’s response was directed at her disbelieving family, so Mom sent it to me and my sister Gretchen along with the message, “Thought you might be interested in Michael’s response to my sending of the video…he didn’t send it to either of you …”

I decided to use screenshots for Mike’s message because the font and color changes make it even more nutty. Mike’s message:

When I received this message, my husband and I immediately noticed that the symbol in the background of the first image, and the corresponding formation of soldiers, did not look like the letter Q. The symbol looks like a circle with an arrow pointing toward the upper left corner, with nothing outside of the circle. Using an image search, we immediately discovered what the logo was actually for, and I put together this response:

So I read through Mike’s response and noticed that the symbol on the sign behind the soldiers (that he included as undeniable proof), as well as the formation of the soldiers, does not denote a Q. If it was a Q, the hash would extend beyond the circle. It is actually a circle with an arrow pointing to the upper-left corner.

Thirty seconds of research led me to what the symbol actually signifies. It is the symbol of the First Logistical Command, which was founded in 1950, and was the largest command unit in the Vietnam War. The unit has since been renamed First Sustainment Command and is currently active to date. Here are some photos of caps and patches being sold on eBay and Amazon.

Here is a link to an article from the Army’s website about a museum dedicated to the Vietnam-era unit: https://www.army.mil/article/22088/first_log_commands_story_comes_alive_at_quartermaster_museum

Here is a link to a site that helps former soldiers reunite with their buddies who served with them in that unit: https://www.vetfriends.com/units/21/1st-logistical-command

I chose not to send this to your nutty friends, Mom because I want nothing to do with them. I don’t care what your Internet friends believe or don’t believe, but I do care what you believe. If I can debunk what your buddy sent as proof in five minutes, maybe it is actually you who should have an open mind about things. If you’re going to blindly follow people’s ideas, doesn’t it make more sense to follow the ideas of people you have known and respected your whole life? And followed yourself until recently? By the way, sending this to us is breaking the agreement to stop sending political material. That sure didn’t last long.

When I didn’t hear anything back from her for a few days, I assumed I had hurt her feelings, and sent her this message:

I just wanted to say that I don’t want to be in conflict with you at all. I am sure you feel attacked and ganged up on, and that is not my intention. I just feel like the last few times I have talked to you, you want to talk about JFK Jr. being alive, how stupid wearing masks is, and so on. I try to steer the conversation away from those things, but you always bring it back. I am never going to think wearing masks is a big deal, that JFK Jr. is alive, that Democrats are evil clones, or that Trump is a good president or even a good person. I don’t want to receive anything about that stuff via email either. I NEVER send you stuff or bring up stuff that is contrary to your beliefs. All I expect is that you show the same courtesy to me. We share many of the same interests, so there is plenty to talk about besides those things. I don’t want there to be a rift between us. I just don’t want to talk about that stuff.

The end of my message debunking Mike’s email might seem a touch insensitive, but I was quite frustrated. While QAnon is new to my mother, I have been dealing with her fantastical beliefs my whole life. It was irritating to me that Mike’s delusional email was so convincing to my mother, that she was certain my sister and I would find it compelling and intelligent. My sister joked that Mom probably thought, “Boom — in your face! Try to argue with that, sucker!”

In my next post, I will share Mom’s reply as well as the letter I wrote after I received it. It will make much more sense after reading this post.