Why Are Some Souls Missing from the Afterlife?

Some of the dead seem to be absent, and I think I know why

All those enthralling stories about contact with the dead and signs from beyond the grave inspire and amaze us. And it’s no wonder.. they give us hope about that inevitable finality every human being will face. They serve as reassurance and cause us to ponder our own spirituality. They’re a promise that death is not the bleak, dark ending we most fear. But what about the people who don’t get that reassurance? For every person who’s convinced the afterlife exists, there are an equal number who never get that confirmation.

It's something many people grieving a loved one’s death ask themselves -- 'Why do I not sense their presence? Why don't they visit me in my dreams? Where are they?'

With respect to skeptics and members of the Woo-Woo Club, I have to put a disclaimer here. No one truly knows the nature of the afterlife. (There-- I said it for you.) But as death is the greatest human mystery and there’s tantalizing evidence we continue to exist beyond it, it’s in our nature to endlessly speculate about it. That’s certainly true of me.

Even after decades of experience as a medium, I still marvel at those incidences and wrestle with their implications. When a reading is successful, I am humbled, awed and brimming with gratitude. When a reading fails, I put myself first in line for the blame. The problem must be my technique is flawed or that particular spook has some objection to me personally. They don’t like the cut of my jib or simply weren’t in a chatty mood. I’d rather accept the blame than believe the fault lies with them. Still, I know my failure to make contact instills darker doubts in the recipient’s mind.

The hope is that soul is somehow busy or distracted, because other reasons are too troubling. Could it be they don’t know they’re dead or are wandering about in limbo? Worse still is the idea that a deceased loved one is in some way suffering a punishment or didn’t successfully make it to the Other Side.. that they just aren’t “there.”

In an article I published a while back, I explained how the afterlife is like a lucid dream. That's not my own brainwork, but is a concept conveyed to me by my father (My Dead Dad Taught Me About the Afterlife.) I've been a lucid dreamer all my life. There's a lot of internet hype written on the subject, but few people clearly understand what lucid dreaming entails. For most people who actually have them, that lucidity comes and goes.

It's like driving a car with a bum transmission. You can be traveling along the road normally, then the car slips out of gear and your progress stalls. The same thing happens during lucid dreams. One minute, you're fully aware those events aren't real and are only a construct of your sleeping subconscious. Then you start interacting with the characters, playing that role as it were, and your awareness that it's only just a dream fades away. I didn't appreciate how accurate that my father's analogy was until a recent interaction with a dead relative.

My nephew-in-law "B" died last March and I've been aching to connect with him, but it just wasn't happening. I had one brief confab with B a few weeks after his death, which wasn't really productive. Following that, I tried multiple times to reach him, but got nothing but crickets. I finally gave up about 6 months ago and figured when B was ready, he'd reach out to me. Still, I worried at what that absence might imply. Was he lost in the spirit realm, out of place, incommunicado, MIA?

It's an occupational hazard for all mediums, but one most won't admit to. We cannot guarantee contact with a specific soul. Not every soul is communicative. Not every soul is available or accessible. Not every soul is even interested. But this was the first time I'd ever gotten the silent treatment from a family member.

Then last week, he did exactly as I’d hoped and B reached out to me after all these months. I was delighted to have that glimmer of interaction, but quickly noted some things were off. First of all, the minds-eye image I picked up of him showed B in his work uniform. That seemed decidedly strange, because B wasn’t happy in his job or his occupation. Also, I had the distinct impression B was hurried, preoccupied, fretting about schedules & duties. Odd as it sounds, I’ve known other souls who’ve mentioned "working," doing the same jobs they had when they were living. The very idea perplexes me no end.

I sought a way to inquire 'what's up' or 'how's it going on your side?' B answered with, "I'm flying blind."

I am hesitant to ascribe meaning to such a cryptic statement. But my spidey-sense tells me B was struggling; trying to adapt, perhaps still battling his own personal demons. His one overriding goal in life was to provide for his family. My impression was he's still trying to do so, even in the hereafter.

That's as much as I got from him. I tried to engage him in conversation, but it seemed I was no longer on his wavelength. B faded out, as if no longer acknowledging my presence. Like the momentary awareness during a lucid dream, it seemed that B had slid back into that alternate reality that he had created for himself.

The baggage we tote around in this life gets carried into the next. We're burdened with unresolved conflicts, unfinished goals and unrelenting regrets. And that burden often takes time to sort out.

However, time as we perceive it does not exist for them. There are no weeks or hours or months for souls in the afterlife. We gauge everything in life by those measures of time, so it's incredibly hard to imagine an existence without that. The passage of a year for us might be only an eye blink to them. And I suspect that souls could spend an eternity reliving a handful of minutes.

Though I wasn’t able to achieve any kind of meaningful exchange with B, what did come through gave me ample food for thought. So does he know he’s dead? Yes, absolutely. B could not have contacted me otherwise. But the incongruities of that contact tells me his awareness is transient. Like a lucid dream, their cognizance seems to come and go.

Haven’t you ever had a fabulous dream that you didn’t want to awaken from? And if woken during that wonderful dream, didn’t you ever rush to fall asleep again, hoping to drift back into that other reality? I think the same applies to some souls. This might explain why some souls don’t reach out to us and why we cannot contact them.

Your continued support of my work would be greatly appreciated. Please subscribe for email notifications and/or contribute to my Gofundme page.