Whew! I Feel So Much Better Now That Trump has Clarified January 6th for Us
I was worried that the events of January 6th might be lied about, or mis-characterized. I needn’t have worried so much.
It is really heartening to know that even an old fossil like me can still learn to be patient; learn to not be so cynical or skeptical; and not always have to be so darned logical. What a relief to know that we all have Donald J. Trump, with his keen, incisive wit — and perfect grasp of facts — to help misguided folks get back on track. Hearken then to the words of The Chosen One, so you too may feel uplifted and better.
Brand new reporting from Politico is the cherished vehicle of my new clarity, in which it is reported that №45 told Laura Ingraham of Fox News, that bastion of truth and clarity: “It was zero threat. Right from the start, it was zero threat. Look, they went in — they shouldn’t have done it — some of them went in, and they’re hugging and kissing the police and the guards, you know? They had great relationships. A lot of the people were waved in, and then they walked in, and they walked out.”
This makes me so ashamed of my earlier misunderstanding of January 6th; but all is well now, and I feel so much better. But, being just a Man, and therefore a weak being, I have some (I’m sure silly) questions floating about in my mind — a residual curse of my education and experience, for which I ask forgiveness. What’s that you say? My silly questions? Well…
Why did so many House and Senate members, and staff, and police officers look like they felt threatened? There is lots of video of what happened at the Capitol that day, and it seems, it really seems, that a lot of people were acting as if they were under threat.
I’m thinking of members lying on the floor, hiding and texting loved-ones; of plain-clothes security pointing guns at barricaded doors; er, and oh yes, the presence of barricaded doors; of an officer Goodman getting the rioters to chase him (away from where Mike Pence and his family were hiding, as I recall); and the same officer (I think) stopping Sen. Romney from walking into a crowd at the end of the corridor.
How did hugging and kissing the officers and guards result in so many injuries to Capital police officers, and the death of Officer Sicknick? I know that love can hurt, but something does seem just a tiny bit off. Thank goodness that this love fest took place, I guess. Sigh… amore. Who doesn’t like to see real romance, or at least brotherly-love, in these troubling times?
How did so many windows and doors get smashed? These love-struck Trump supporters (if he’s explaining their actions for us, it’s hard to see how they were Antifa and BLM) were outside, and then they were inside. Happily, with my new clarity, I can answer. The police broke all the windows and doors in their heartfelt desire to go out and play with their new friends. It’s nice to see people getting along so well, isn’t it? Aah, they had a play-date; how cute.
So, those are my questions. As I said, I was starting to worry that I was being misled by explanations and comments of other people, like Sen. Ron Johnson or Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene. Now, thanks to Mr. Trump’s clarification, I can simply be awestruck by the amazing bravery of Sen. Johnson — aye, and his magnanimity in not wanting to steal Trump’s thunder regarding January 6th. Indeed, now I can just be amazed and humbled by the prescient and penetrating analysis of Ms. Greene — surely a guiding light in the gloaming.
But, best of all is that now we have heard directly from Mr. Trump, and to such clarifying and edifying effect, I don’t have to worry myself that some unbalanced conspiracy-theorist might someday come up with the notion that January 6th never really happened at all…that it was just a movie production, and that’s really why everyone other than the “rioters” looked and acted so scared. That is now one notion that won’t be floated — and in some ways it seems a shame, since I do appreciate really good acting.
Heavens, I feel better now!