When Your Biologic Clock Lies to You

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Abstract

ildren. I dreamed of baby showers and gender reveals. I had names picked out for both boys and girls.I even felt like I wanted children (biological clock anyone). This went on for years. I even had a few times when I thought I might have been pregnant. But I didn’t feel excited when those moments happened.I felt nothing.After so many years of marriage, my husband and I talked. We talked and we realized that we didn’t want children. I realized I wanted a baby. But only the baby. The fun stuff like the gender reveal and baby shower, but I didn’t want to raise a child for the rest of my life.We decided for him to get a vasectomy. My biological clock still ticks. It isn’t very pleasant, because I know it’s a false signal. What I want is the freedom that comes from not having children. I want to be able to travel. I like hav

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ing more money. More importantly, I do not have to worry about passing any genetic or mental illnesses on to my children.Some people might think that not having kids makes me entitled and selfish. But it would have been more selfish to bring a child into the world that I didn’t want to raise. I’m sure I would have loved them had I had them, but it wasn’t my path.People who choose to not have children are often pressured into the idea of having children. Told that once they have them it will be different. And I don’t know if it would have been or not. But why take the chance? Plenty of children in the world don’t have a loving family.Right now, I’ll remain a cat mom. I love my cats to pieces. I’ll continue to be a pushover, but I know I can take care of them in a way I would not have been able to take care of a child.</article></body>

Why I chose to be a Cat Mom instead of a Mom

Picture by Author Mary Morton

Cats are entitled. They feel they deserve everything on their schedule. When it comes to my two cats I’m okay with that because I’m a big pushover and they have me wrapped around their little paws.

Children are entitled too. Sometimes this is because they are spoiled. Sometimes this is because they have certain needs.

I chose to have cats because I felt I could meet their needs. But when it came to kids, I did not feel I was up to the challenge.

I got married in 2005 and I followed the standard path. Get married, discuss children. I dreamed of baby showers and gender reveals. I had names picked out for both boys and girls.

I even felt like I wanted children (biological clock anyone). This went on for years. I even had a few times when I thought I might have been pregnant. But I didn’t feel excited when those moments happened.

I felt nothing.

After so many years of marriage, my husband and I talked. We talked and we realized that we didn’t want children. I realized I wanted a baby. But only the baby. The fun stuff like the gender reveal and baby shower, but I didn’t want to raise a child for the rest of my life.

We decided for him to get a vasectomy. My biological clock still ticks. It isn’t very pleasant, because I know it’s a false signal. What I want is the freedom that comes from not having children. I want to be able to travel. I like having more money. More importantly, I do not have to worry about passing any genetic or mental illnesses on to my children.

Some people might think that not having kids makes me entitled and selfish. But it would have been more selfish to bring a child into the world that I didn’t want to raise. I’m sure I would have loved them had I had them, but it wasn’t my path.

People who choose to not have children are often pressured into the idea of having children. Told that once they have them it will be different. And I don’t know if it would have been or not. But why take the chance? Plenty of children in the world don’t have a loving family.

Right now, I’ll remain a cat mom. I love my cats to pieces. I’ll continue to be a pushover, but I know I can take care of them in a way I would not have been able to take care of a child.