When You Don’t Have The Answers
5 Ways to Avoid “I don’t know”
We are plummeted with questions on the daily. From co-workers, kids, and family members. There’s no end. Here are some ways to approach questions you don’t have the answers for . . . without ever having to say “I don’t know.”
1. Ask for clarification
We know this already, but when someone asks a question and we’re clueless, the best initial approach is to ask for clarification. Ask them to repeat the question or summarize their question back to them and ask to be corrected if your summary has holes in it.
Asking for clarification can also help the asker understand exactly what they are inquiring about and allow them to be more specific about what they’re asking. This may lead to a question you do have the answer for.
Try this: “I want to be sure I understand what you’re asking. Can you tell me more about what you meant when you said ____? I want to know your specific concerns.”
2. This is what I do know
Start by acknowledging the question. Then move on to what you do know about the subject at hand. Use your resources, use your experiences, use your knowledge to share–even it’s not complete–what you do know.
Altogether, it might sound something like this: “That’s a great question. I can’t speak to your brother-in-law’s experience, but what I can tell about is ____ . I would be happy to find out more information and get back to you. Also you should ask Joan, she’s a great resource.”
3. This is what I can do right now
When the time comes and you don’t have a clue, you still don’t have to say “I don’t know.” I recommend avoiding the phrase altogether. Besides people don’t like to hear what you don’t know or what you can’t do for them. They want to know what you CAN do for them.
It would sound like this: “Those are important questions. What I can do right now is help you find reliable online resources.”
4. Discuss the concern inside the question
Sometimes people just want to talk about the subject at hand vs hearing some detailed answer to their question. Here’s where your personal EQ (emotional quotient) will come in. Listen for the questions or concerns behind the question and discuss that instead.
It may sound like this: “When you ask how many people survive heart surgery, that’s an important question and we can find the exact statistics you’re looking for. But I wonder if there’s not more to that question. What are your feelings about your upcoming surgery?”
5. Listen
Often questions come and all the the person really needs is for someone to listen. Don’t be too quick to formulate a response or an answer. Sometimes when you let people talk about the issue, they talk themselves into the answer. All you need to supply is the compassion and care.
Try this: “I’m sorry you’re facing this right now. Tell me more about what you were just saying.” or “Go ahead, I’m listening.” or “I’m right here. Tell me more.”
For those moments when you need more than a “yes” or “no” or more than a well-reasoned explanation, follow the tips above. You’ve got so much more to say than “I don’t know.”
