avatarKaren Schwartz

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When Something Smells Foul, Is It Coming From You?

Or do you blame the dog?

Photo by JC Gellidon on Unsplash

You can blame today’s prompt on me or maybe some other Karen. 🙄

“Blame Karen! The last time I passed gas, I was…”

The last time I passed gas, I was on my way home from work, and my car begged me to stop. The gauge was near empty, not wise during the frigid winter months. However, filling the tank during cold temperatures sure beats getting out of my car in the summer amid the wasps, so I’m not complaining.

But we all know I didn’t intend this prompt to talk about that kind of gas. I mentioned it to fuel my creative flow. So, to avoid sidestepping all stinky situations, I proclaim I am the queen of passing gas in our household, although Ed’s a close second.

Our kitten, Huey, has answered me dismissively. “No comment!” Unfortunately, we don’t own a dog to pin the odour on.

It’s reasonable that I’d be the guiltier party with providing an unfortunate aroma because I have stomach issues, causing many of the foods I eat to affect me.

Vegetables? It's not a great idea, especially raw.

Milk? Out of the question. So long, beautiful milkshakes! Although I drink lactose-free milk, there are times I still get lactose from cheese, and I pay for it, and so does Ed.

It’s no wonder he hasn’t kicked me out of bed, but lord knows that he’s tried. It’s just that I have nowhere else to go. We’re currently couch-less, but that doesn’t stop him from voicing his disapproval. He already wears earplugs and an eye mask, so I can leave the T.V. on while we sleep.

Does he now need nose plugs, too?

That would be pushing it.

The last time I passed gas was last night. I was having a good night when one slipped out. Ed added to the gastric symphony, and we had a good laugh. How is it that two mature adults in their sixties can laugh at such silly antics?

I’ve seen many older people do it, too, and I assume we must have a level of understanding as our aging stomachs turn.

The other day, I stopped for gas to fill my car on my way home. It’s not a daily occurrence, but passing gas is, and Ed’s paying a premium price for it.

Now it’s your turn. When was the last time you passed gas? You know you’re dying to come clean to clear the air.

If you’re looking for this month’s prompts, The Challenged’s got you covered.

Here are the participants and supporters of the pub’s challenges. Please show their stories some love. (Please let me know if you want your name removed from or added to the list. Either is easy to do, per your request. All you need to do is ask in the comments or a note.)

Adrienne Beaumont, NancyO, Randy Pulley, The Sturg, Harry Hogg, Susie Winfield, Vidya Sury, Collecting Smiles, Trisha Faye, Bernie Pullen, Michelle Jimerson Morris, Paula Shablo, Brandon Ellrich, Ravyne Hawke, Pat Romito LaPointe, Karen Hoffman, Vincent Pisano, Michael Rhodes, Bruce Coulter, Rachella Angel Page, Pluto Wolnosci 🟣, Lisa Guard, Dixie Dodd, Adrian CDTPPW, Leigh-Anne Dennison, barry robinson, Jerry Dwyer, Jennifer Dunne, Lynn L. Alexander, Keeley Schroder, Julia A. Keirns, Ruby Noir 😈, Emma Vincent, Frances A. Chiu, John Welford, Deborah Joyce Goodwin (Red:The-Lady In Blue), Misty Rae, Patricia Timmermans, Maria Rattray, John Hua Technology ☕️, John Hansen, Zaq Cass, Eva MacInnes

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