When I Signed An NDA With A Misogynist Man
Inspired by true events
In the past 48 hours, I have made myself go through unavoidable stress.
I got in touch with a client from IOWA. He was introduced to me by a highly hypocritical and cunning lady. And then shit happened.
This man was one of the most pathetic and miserable creatures God has created on this planet. I am not a judgmental person, but I observe energies and pay attention to what people say to me. Be it on the phone or face to face conversations I can analyze what the person I am speaking to intends to bring to me.
He started with praises of telling me “Oh Gurpreet. You are very impressive. Your poems are thoughtful" and ended up telling me “Oh Gurpreet. You are a terrible writer, and you must improve your writing skills.” He further added, “You need to work on your attitude towards work and life.”
Why did this happen?
Because I fearlessly told him that I won’t be writing his book of 70,000 words, approximately in USD 270. It sounded like a joke of the year to me. I told him upfront that I wanted a contract to be signed first before I even get myself into the writing part of it.
Why did I do that?
Because I have been cheated by reputed clients in the past too. They asked for samples of my work and didn’t pay me. They rejected my work by finding faults in my writing. This is what they told me. But I was stunned to see my articles on their websites.
And this happens all the time.
What didn’t I like in this man?
I invited him to one of the creative cultural events last weekend where he praised me like anything and later on, he told me that one of the musicians in the event didn’t play good music. I was surprised to hear his words.
As per me, her music was out of this world, and she was just incredible. But he said he didn’t understand a word and degraded her right there on my call. By now I knew with whom I was speaking to, and I asked him “Which instrument do you play in your life like her?” He didn’t respond to it.
He behaved highly immaturely when I asked him what you brought for me on the table that I should prove my capability to you by writing a sample for you? His ego got hurt and he wrote a huge message to me on WhatsApp before blocking me. I took his words straight to my heart and soul.
I wrote a huge reply back to him in a language that he intended to understand from my side.
What did it make me realize?
It made me realize my worth, power in my words and beauty of my soul.
I am an author with 10 years of experience in writing and with my three books out there in the market I don’t want anyone to reach out to me for writing a sample for their work. I won’t do that. My work is out there published on various websites and one can always visit my Medium profile to get a glimpse of my writing. This realization relaxed my soul and took my worries away.
Unfortunately, this man wanted me to say yes to everything he was throwing at me, and I dared to ask for the signed contract first the way I signed an NDA with him for his bullshit idea of the book.
Why Am I Writing This?
Because I care about others. You could be unknown to me, but I got to say this to you.
I would request all the new-comers and experienced writers out there in the world to keep in mind the following points before you get yourself into any kind of trouble:
- You don’t owe anything to anyone. You are you. If they are coming to you, it is purely for business reasons. Sign an NDA after reading all the terms and conditions by them.
- Prepare all the points for your contract from co-dependency on other writers to the editing part. Ask for the promotional events and your profit share in sales and royalty as well.
- Never write the complete book just for USD 270. You are putting your heart and soul into the work you do. If your client cannot understand the time and energy you put into your writing, he/she must leave you alone.
- Don’t let them taunt you about your upbringing and personal life. This man has degraded me, and I had to give it back to him. I didn’t want to but somewhere down the line, I realized he went too far and crossed all limits.
- Don’t write free samples. They either like you or don’t. You wouldn’t and shouldn’t beg for the work. The right person will reach out to you.
- Ask for the price you deserve and don’t let your client dictate the pricing for you. You are the master of your ship, that’s why you are a writer. If terms don’t match, quit the project straight away. Get into no bargaining zone because he won’t make it to USD 200000 from USD 270 for the entire book.
- Some people need to be fixed like the way I fixed this man. Don’t take their bullshit at heart. I did because I am a highly sensitive person. You will come across many like him targeting women in general because they believe we are living in the plight of men but that’s not the truth.
- Speak for yourself even if it means standing alone and fighting for it. Don’t get mislead by them and don’t ever believe that you won’t find the right client again. You will. So just keep on working hard.
- Nobody knows why you became a writer, but you know that by yourself. So never forget the reason why you became one even when someone like this misogynist man tries to degrade you.
- Say it loud on the face and cut off all ties because morons are not going to learn. “Repeat after me, not my monkeys, not my business.”
The lesson I learned
It is okay to come across a highly unprofessional and immature man, but it is not okay to start believing in his words and sulking in bed for a good 4 to 6 hours.
I hope my experience helps you out in making wise decisions in life.
Read more from me:
Gurpreet Dhariwal is the author of “My Soul Rants: Poems of a Born Spectator.” Her eBook is now available at Google PlayStore, Amazon, and Kindle. Connect with Gurpreet on LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, or Youtube
