When Even Time & Dedication Can’t Make Your Dreams Come True
The Battling Mindset of a Dreamer and a Realist
One of the only for sure ways to find success in this world is fairly simple:
Never Give Up
Whether it’s simple successes such as writing your first book, making new friends, earning your first $1000, accomplishing most goals just takes time, dedication, and a willingness to learn.
In this respect, for those willing to put the time, dedication, blood, sweat, and tears in, accomplishing goals can be fairly straightforward.
Look at yourself in the mirror and think back 5 years.
- Did you ever imagine you would be where you are today?
- Would you have believed you would have been able to accomplish what you have?
- Did any of your accomplishments come much easier than you may have anticipated?
It’s amazing what can happen in 1 year, 3 years, and especially in 5 years when you’re dedicated to showing up and being consistent.
Don’t believe me? Here are a few examples:
Thomas Edison: Spent years failing to develop the first practical electric light bulb. After approximately 1,000 failed attempts, he finally succeeded.
J.K. Rowling: Faced multiple rejections from publishers for years with her Harry Potter manuscript. After persisting, she finally got it published, leading to a global phenomenon.
Steve Jobs: Was ousted from Apple, the company he co-founded, but returned years later to transform it into one of the world’s most valuable companies.
Albert Einstein: Had difficulties in his early academic life and was initially denied a teaching post at a university. He later developed the theory of relativity and won the Nobel Prize in Physics.
Stephen King: His first novel, “Carrie,” was rejected 30 times. He persevered, and it became a hit, kick-starting his career as a best-selling author.
While it’s amazing to hear of the amazing accomplishments that can happen with time and persistence, there is another important factor at play.
Dreams vs Reality
I am a dreamer, but I am also a realist.
I genuinely believe that achieving almost any dream is possible with enough time and dedication, but there’s a 3rd component:
Sacrifice
“The trouble is, you think you have time.” — Buddha
The Fragile Balance of Dreams, Goals, and Sacrifices
5 years ago I was working in a dead-end job working for one of the largest entertainment companies in the world. I had been at the company for four years, basically right out of college and I had dreamed of working there since I was a kid.
From the day I started, I figured I would be a lifer, I would never leave. Why would I? I knew I was where I wanted to be, I was working for the company I wanted to work for, I had a ton of friends that were indistinguishable from family, and I saw a path forward leading the life I wanted to live.
As years at the company went on though, I started to see the cracks in my plan.
The Happiest Place on Earth was simply a slogan. While it may have been true for some of the lucky few, even those who dedicated their entire careers to working there had found themselves miserable towards what should have been the end of their careers when they realized they had basically no retirement savings, pensions had gone away or migrated to one time cash payouts that amounted to basically nothing, and the cost of living had gone up in the area so much that they were being priced out of the homes and neighborhoods they have lived in their entire adult lives.
It was a really sad situation to witness, and it was a harsh and humbling realization that I needed to get out before it was too late.
This was not a decision I took lightly. Working there and being a part of that community was my lifelong dream. I knew that if I put the time and dedication in I could have worked my way up into the creative leadership positions I dreamed of. Even then, at leadership or lower level executive positions, there was no guarantee that I would ever be able to afford to own a house, raise a family, or just pay my bills.
Five years ago I decided to make the move.
I left my dream job, went back to school for my Master’s Degree, moved thousands of miles to a new city where I knew I could find higher paying, more stable work, and pivoted my career and life completely.
I know if I had stuck around, the situation could have changed though highly unlikely with the way the economy is moving and the disappearance of the middle class. I wasn’t going to take that chance.
I could have found any number of ways to make income on the side like I had already been doing to make ends meet, but working 80 hours and 7 days a week is not sustainable for anybody.
So, here I am.
5 years later, I’m working one full time job that pays me enough that I can not only pay my bills, afford a home and allows me to only work 5 days per week (usually), but I’m fairly certain that I will be able to “retire” one day.
To this day though, of course I’m always asking “What If”.
Life Is Full of Hard Choices
While it would be easy for me to lie to myself and say I’m completely content, totally thankful for the decisions I made and even more appreciative for the life I now have, it’s currently 4am, and I’m sitting here writing this article because I couldn’t sleep.
There’s no one path to success in life and that’s mainly because “success” is different for everyone, and your definition of success will likely change multiple times throughout your life.
When I was in my 20s and working in the job I spoke about above, my definition of success was something along the lines of :
“A full time creative executive, making enough money to have a house and pay my bills”
Just a few years later after I moved thousands of miles from home to start a new career and the pandemic hit, my definition of “success” evolved into:
“Keep my current job, travel, and make friends”.
Now, being in a time in my life where my career is stable, I have friends, an amazing, beautiful partner and a path to “retirement” my definition of “success” has just started to migrate to:
“Have the time, money and freedom to spend my life with my friends and family”
When I look at what my current definition of success is, it’s become painfully obvious that had I stuck with my original career path, there’s no way I ever would have been able to achieve my modern definition of success.
Looking back, while it was a tough decision at the time and there are plenty of aspects of that job that I miss, especially the community and the product we were a part of building, I’m very thankful I had the foresight to make the decision to move on.
Today’s Choices Based on Yesterday’s Lessons
Looking back on the tough decisions I had to make in the past to get to where I am today, I am now facing similar decisions. Fortunately in this case I don’t need to consider picking up my life and moving thousands of miles leaving my friends and family behind, but the decisions are still time sensitive and will make a profound impact on mine (and my family’s life) in the coming years.
As mentioned before, I’m very fortunate that my current career pays the bills and will likely allow me to even retire at some point in the future. Compared to where I came from or where I could be, it’s not a bad place to be at all, and I am definitely not complaining. However, comparison is the thief of all joy.
I’m at a crossroads now, which is keeping me up at night.
As many of you know or may be experiencing yourselves, we are now in a period of economic uncertainty that’s allowing companies to take advantage of this time as an excuse to lay off tens of thousands of workers. While some of us are likely a little safer than others due to projects we’re working on or our levels of criticality in the business, it still doesn’t make for an inspiring or even mentally healthy work environment.
Personally I have been put in a place over the past year where I’ve had people laid off all around me including on my own team while my workload has quadrupled and my pay and position have remained stagnant. I am really in no place to complain or leave though because of the current state of the job market. I also am well aware that if I were to leave I would be starting all over at a new company which could set me up for the “first-in, first-out” layoff situation, and even if layoffs slow down, I would be spending years getting up to speed in a new company.
I could just sit and wait it out hoping that all recovers in the coming years but the realist and driven individual in me isn’t much a fan of patience and hope. I believe in taking action.
Creating My Own Success
If I can’t depend on a company to secure my financial future and freedom, then it’s up to me to carve my own path. This realization has propelled me to delve into the realm of leveraging AI and technology to carve my own path to success. My goal is to educate myself and others, building online businesses that are not just profitable, but also provide the freedom to live life on my own terms.
I am passionate about having the autonomy to shape my work around my life, not the other way around. The digital landscape provides an expansive field to play in, from e-commerce to content creation, and everything in between. The key here is to identify niches or problems that I am passionate about and use technology to create solutions that resonate with a wider audience. It’s about building something that matters, something that has a positive impact.
In this journey, I am not just chasing financial gains; I am seeking intellectual and creative fulfillment, freedom to work on projects featuring topics that I am passionate about, and the opportunity to meet like-minded people all over the world.
Conclusion: Embracing the Path of Self-Made Success
Continuing on this trajectory of self-reliance and innovation, I am focusing my efforts into learning about AI and harnessing its power to create tools, systems, and processes. This isn’t just about professional development; it’s about constructing a foundation for my future — a future where I am not at the mercy of corporations or employers.
My aim is to develop online businesses that not only educate and assist others but also secure my financial independence. This journey into AI and technology is a path to discovering new ways to work smarter, not harder, enabling me to achieve my current definition of success: a life rich with time, money, and freedom to enjoy with my friends and family.
Key Takeaways:
1. Self-Reliance in Career: Depending on corporate entities for financial stability is a risky game; forging your own path provides a sense of control and empowerment.
2. Ever Evolving Definition of Success: Your definition of success will likely evolve throughout your lifetime. Embrace the change and be open to taking new paths and facing new risks.
3. AI as a Catalyst: Embracing AI and technology isn’t just about keeping up with the times; it’s about utilizing these tools to create innovative solutions for everyday challenges.
4. Business Ventures: Building your own sources of income can be the perfect pairing with your full time career to garner financial freedom and offers the flexibility to define your own success.
5. Continuous Personal Development: Never stop learning, growing, evolving with the times and chasing new dreams, and most importantly, setting new goals.
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