When Dad’s Girlfriend Dies, I’ll Get a Bunch of Money
Why That’s Not a Great Idea
My dad’s will provided that after he died a big chunk of his money would be placed in a trust for the benefit of his long-time girlfriend. The trust would be administered by his two adult daughters, neither of whom had a particularly good relationship with said girlfriend.
What could possibly go wrong?
My dad died in 2006. Every four months since then, in accordance with the trust, my sister and I have sent a large check to dad’s sweetie.
The two of us get whatever is left in the trust when she dies.
We’re not entirely sure why Dad set it up this way. I suspect he wanted to avoid a situation where he leaves it directly to her, and then she remarries, resulting in Dad’s hard-earned money ending up in the hands of her new husband. (If she does remarry, according to the will, the checks stop.)
Or one where he leaves the money directly to her — and the next day she gets hit by a bus, and her adult children inherit his wealth.
But we really don’t know. And we certainly can’t ask him.
Maybe this plan made sense to my father. But Karma-wise? It’s all messed up.
For one thing, it’s a big whopping incentive for me and my sister to want her dead. (If this were an Agatha Christie novel? She’d be toast.)
Luckily for her, we’re not the murdering kind. I’m a librarian. My sister is a musician. How would we even do it? I’d bash her to death with a reference book while my sister whacked her upside the head with a violin?
Not going to happen.
Instead, four times a year, I google Karen (not her real name) to make sure she’s still on the planet and then send her a nice fat check.
Meanwhile, the amount of money in the trust is dwindling. The longer Karen lives, the less will be left for us.
She is currently 90 years old. She will probably live forever.
And she deserves to! She made the last 15 years of dad’s life very happy.
I’m grateful that dad left us anything at all. He could have left her everything.
Still — could I use that money? You bet I could.
Which means? When I google her name before cutting her that large check, I don’t really want her obituary to turn up.
And yet? I kind of do.
Thanks, Dad.
If I ever suspected that I wasn’t a saint, you’ve figured out a great way to remind me of that fact, four times a year.
So what does this mean for you, the reader? Just this. In case you’re thinking of this kind of set-up for your own estate planning?
I’d think twice.
( Medium Sherpa and Writing Coach Roz Warren writes for everyone from the Funny Times to the New York Times.)
