ARTICLE

When Creative Blocks Affect Our Self-Image

On being a creator that doesn’t produce

Regardless of their vocation, every person knows how incredibly frustrating it is to feel like you can’t string words together. It feels like a curse. Similar to the feeling of waking up particularly off; those wretched days where you manage to drop everything from your hands.

However, it’s worth noting that having a creative block is especially upsetting when you’re expected to be a constant source of content and creativity.

The concept of writer’s block has existed since the early 19th century.

In his diary, famed Romantic poet Samuel L. Coleridge described moments when he couldn’t write as an “indefinite indescribable Terror,” feeling shameful and “Not worthy of life” for not writing frequently.

Similarly, Virginia Woolf, in A Writer’s Diary, called herself “a failure as a writer” for opting to write out a diary entry rather than finish her novel Jacob’s Room.

The idea of writing and art occurring from a source outside of ourselves — creativity as a spiritual, almost divine quality — is a legacy of the Romantic movement. Art was seen as a connection to the divine. It was the closest thing humans could do that resembled God-like creation. Therefore, when Romantic poets could not write, it was yet another reminder of our flawed nature. We are helpless to this emptying of our creativity.

Although we mostly don’t view it in such a black and white way in current times, we still tend to cling to that spark of inspiration. I don’t blame us for doing this at times. Creating when you’re one hundred percent up to it is truly spectacular. To this day, I struggle to make myself create when I’m not inspired.

Woolf seeing herself as a “failure as a writer” is an apt description: when you see yourself as a reflection of your work, and you can’t even bring yourself to hold a pen — are you even a writer anymore? What have you become if you don’t make art?

We have a tendency of tying our sense of worth with what we produce, rather than who we are. Even though the art you put out is an extension of yourself, it’s not a reflection of your worth as person.

This false equivalent — I’m not producing; therefore, I am worthless — does a great deal of damage to our self-image and self-esteem. I go through phases of loathing myself for not writing, yet I never set these hyperbolic expectations on others.

Just in case anybody needs to hear this: It’s okay to take a break from the constant content milling. Even though the algorithm God will punish you because you’ve been bad, is it really worth it if it’s detrimental to your health?

When you’ve been pushing yourself to a point where you’re burnt out, ask yourself: Is this something someone who loves themselves would do?

© Omy 2021

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