Humor

Using A Bungee Cord May Not Always Be the Wisest Choice

You‘d think common sense would prevail

My ex-husband, Drew, used bungee cords for everything, as did I, but where I used them to hold down covers on barbecue grills and outdoor furniture, he used them where strong rope would have been a better choice.

A stretchy, useful cord

Bungee cords were a marvelous convenience that I found useful for many applications. So much so that I bought a large jar of them in various sizes, widths, and colors and may have used them all at one time or another.

But as with anything else, there is a caveat. There are times when you don’t want to tie something with a cord that stretches, like heavy objects you need to keep secure. Tell that to my ex-husband!

He was set in his ways and extremely inflexible. Once he formed a firm conviction, there was no changing his mind.

I witnessed some of the items he used bungee cords for and thought a better choice would have been a stiff rope, but it’s his stuff. If he wants to tie his belongings down willy-nilly with a stretchy band, who am I to stop him?

Maybe I’m more of a practical person and need to feel everything in my life is secure, whereas he was more of a devil-may-care type.

A used Recreational Vehicle

As it happened, the time came when using a bungee cord incorrectly caused a calamitous problem.

My marriage was developing issues. We seemed to have nothing much in common as we did while dating. He and my son from a previous marriage were not getting along as well as before, either.

I thought camping might be a fun, family thing to do together, as I had enjoyed camping for years, and so I kept my eye out for a used camper.

Not much of an outdoors type, and mostly having an agenda that didn’t always include me, my husband reluctantly went along with what he called my “somewhat ridiculous travel plans.”

He had been married three times before and found some of our shenanigans to be an annoyance.

He finally agreed to help me purchase a used 22' long motor home from a friend of his. A perfect size for our family with extra sleeping space over the driver’s and passenger seats.

Though it ran well, it needed new tires, a little de-rusting, painting, tightening of doors, and a new toilet.

I was excited to do this with him. We were preparing a trip with our RV as if all were well and there was no huge age difference between us. It may be exactly what our marriage needed.

Road-worthy

The RV had lots of nooks and crannies to store our belongings and we spent the next few weekends loading it up for our first trip.

My main concern was bringing needed items to make us comfortable. Drew insisted on bringing a small TV for our first trip and was not interested in the items I felt were necessary.

We disagreed as usual, and our upcoming trip was stretching our already fragile relationship.

As a camper, the only entertainment I brought was music, but if having a TV with us would make him happy, why not? Drew dragged my son’s grey TV from his bedroom to the RV and looked for a safe spot to put it.

He found one — on the shelf over the table. Great, it fit perfectly, now all we had to do was tie it down securely.

He insisted on using a bungee cord against my protests. I instinctively knew it was risky. I had used bungee cords in the past and knew their limitations. As always, he won that argument even after I pointed out they’re not meant for heavy objects because they stretch —much like our marriage was being stretched to its limits. He couldn’t see either.

Maybe I should have argued harder, but since our marriage was already iffy, I discontinued expressing my opinion on the matter.

Hardly a mile away

It didn’t take long and only one curve for us to realize that a bungee cord holding down a heavy, older-model TV on a high shelf, with someone driving as fast as my husband did, was a bad idea.

Once the cord stretched, it let go of the TV which slipped out from underneath it. It came crashing down, hitting the table, then landed on the camper floor, instantly shattering to pieces — not too unlike where our marriage seemed to be heading.

Luckily we weren’t sitting at the table when it fell.

In my head, I said, “I told you so, why don’t you ever respect my opinion?” but I didn’t say it out loud. He wasn’t generally receptive to anyone’s feelings, opinions, or emotions, especially mine.

All he could say was, “You must have given me a defective cord!”

Of course, I hoped the TV would stay in place, just as I hoped the trip was going to help our marriage. Now we had to find a way to discard the numerous pieces of broken TV. Even more so, we wouldn’t have anything to entertain my ex.

You’d think he would have remembered another recent unfortunate incident when his lack of interest in tying things down didn’t work out too well.

A flying table

When we were first married, my husband found a used ping-pong table in excellent condition. Believing it would be a nice addition to the house and something he and my son could do together, he called the owner to say he’d be picking it up the following day.

I was thrilled and quickly made some room for it in the basement. When he went to pick it up after work, my son and I waited at home anticipating the table’s arrival. I assumed he would take precautions to secure it to his car correctly.

Sad to say, he came home without the table.

When I asked where it was, he told me he made it to his destination, tied it to the top of his car, and started down the highway. That’s when the wind got hold of it.

It went flying off his vehicle, almost hit another car, flipped over a few times, and then landed in a wooded area alongside the road.

I asked, “Where is it now?”

“Broken, so I left it there.”

“Why didn’t you bring it back here, anyway?” I questioned.

“It was smashed and I didn’t want to deal with it,” he said.

“Wasn’t it tied down to the car with rope?”

“Oh, I didn’t use rope,” he was quick to reply, “I tied it down with bungee cords!”

There’s no doubt in my mind that a heavy TV, a table, and a marriage need the best support they can get. Both my ex-husband and I learned this the hard way.

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