When 6300 Comments Isn’t Enough, Has Reciprocal Reading Gone Too Far?
Is it wrong to read only within your areas of interest?
Last week I was metaphorically slapped by someone who hasn’t spoken to me for a year. He was angry because I hadn’t read his stories. Back in August 2021, he used to read and comment on mine. But his stories were mostly about US politics, which isn’t my area of interest at all.
I’m British. I don’t follow US politics in a big way, and I’m not really interested in people’s opinions about politics, especially when they’re bitter and divisive, as so many political stories are.
But the issue of reciprocal reading is a biggie for some people on Medium, to the point of telling people off for not reading their stuff. And I’ve just been slapped!
Now, I never asked this chap to read my stories. I thought he liked my work and it wasn’t all about reciprocal reads. I always responded to his comments and I appreciated them. But when I checked his timeline for something to read, I found a barrage of rage, negative political tripe, and unfamiliar celebrities. I passed.
I do try to reciprocate, and I’m genuinely sorry if my reciprocity leaves something to be desired sometimes. But I do engage, a lot — on subjects that interest me! When people get cross because you don’t read their stories, has the reciprocity thing gone too far?
This chap frequently moans that people don’t read his stories, but shouldn’t this mean it’s time to look at why people aren’t reading your stories? Not to get angry and bitter about it?
Should we read more widely?
It raises an interesting question though. Should we all be reading stuff we’re not interested in, just to be reciprocal? Isn’t that a recipe for everyone getting fed up and bored of the platform? We only have so much time, and I already spend far too long on here.
If I start reading about US politics I might lose the will to live. But then again, perhaps I’d learn something and it wouldn’t kill me.
Sometimes, I do read stories I’m not very interested in — if I know it’s important to someone. Or the title piques my curiosity. But I obviously failed with this chap — and he’s still pissed off a year later because I didn’t reciprocate. Oops.
I declined an offer of collaboration
I think the nail in the coffin may have been my disinterest in collaboration. About a year ago, this chap asked me to collaborate with him on writing a piece about a woman in US politics who I’d never heard of. Now, I didn’t want to be rude, but I only write about things that I need to research heavily when a magazine offers me a decent fee for the job. Because research takes time and if you’re not interested, it’s hard work and boring. I like to get the minimum wage.
Also, I usually know something about the subject before I start, and I have an interest in it, so I’m not starting with a totally blank canvas. In this instance I knew literally nothing about the woman — and I didn’t care.
So no, I didn’t want to collaborate with him to write about a woman I’ve never heard of. He was astonished that I’d not come across her, but why would I? America is not the centre of the universe, contrary to popular belief among some people who live there.
America is not the centre of the universe!
Also, I had no legal way of getting a free photo, which makes the not very tempting offer even less appealing.
It was a strange proposition. I have no idea why he wanted to collaborate, but he wrote the piece himself in the end. At least he’ll have benefited from the 12 cents earnings all by himself.
I’ve left over 6300 comments!
I read all sorts of stories on all sorts of topics. I read work by hundreds of different authors. Some of those authors read my stories. Some don’t. I don’t begrudge those who don’t. I mostly read stories I’m interested in. And it makes sense that they would do the same.
I’ve left over 6300 comments in just over one year on Medium, in contrast to publishing 450 stories. That’s about 16 comments every day. I read and comment more than I write. But I read within my areas of interest. And that’s not US politics.
A lot of political stuff is bitter and depressing. I often don’t agree with people’s opinions, even on British politics, and I don’t want to get into political debates on Medium, or Twitter, or on any social media account. I’m not here for that.
I can get much more relevant British politics from the BBC or from my MSN news feed if I want to — without all the personal opinions and unchecked, unsubstantiated, libellous statements that often go with these outraged opinions.
I might read stuff outside my areas of interest when someone asks nicely, but I’m not naturally drawn to it.
Furthermore, I don’t want people to read my work simply for the reciprocal read! I want people to read my stuff because they find it interesting, entertaining, they’re curious, or some other valid reason.
Read because you’re interested! Not just to get a read back. And certainly not due to a sense of obligation.
Low reads and what to do about it
As for those who are enraged and frustrated by low reads, maybe it’s time to review your headlines, and engage with like-minded people. So if you’re writing about US politics, then liaise with other people who write about US politics — people with similar views. Then you can debate the merits of each other’s stories with interest and passion. At least then you’ll find your tribe — people with the similar thoughts and ideas.
Don’t have a go at a Brit because she doesn’t care about your politics — she’s not even living in the same country.
You may be wondering how the conversation started? Well, I agreed with a comment he left on someone’s story. But my engagement seemed to annoy him. I should have kept my mouth shut. I deleted it.
That was one comment I wished I hadn’t bothered to write, but the other 6300+ were mostly appreciated, I think.
We live and learn.
Blimmin’ heck. First world problems. Pathetic isn’t it, really?
© Susie Kearley 2022. All Rights Reserved.
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