Summary

A mother reflects on the challenges of balancing personal identity and responsibilities with the emotional needs of her children, particularly focusing on the importance of expressing pride and love to her daughter amidst the chaos of daily life.

Abstract

The article delves into the author's personal struggle with "mom guilt," the feeling of inadequacy and self-doubt that many parents experience. Amidst the hectic demands of household chores and childcare, she emphasizes the necessity of taking a moment to affirm her love and pride for her daughter. The author recounts a poignant incident where her daughter's emotional response to a simple expression of pride reveals the critical impact of parental validation. Despite the pressures of deadlines and expectations, the author acknowledges the importance of making her children feel loved and valued, urging other parents to communicate these essential affirmations to their children without delay.

Opinions

The author believes that expressing love and pride to children is crucial, as it may not be as evident to them as parents assume.
She suggests that the daily grind of parenting can overshadow the emotional connections that are vital to a child's well-being.
The author implies that societal and personal pressures on parents, especially mothers, can lead to a sense of failure if they do not meet all expectations.
She conveys a sense of urgency in addressing the emotional needs of children, emphasizing that these needs should not be postponed.
The author values the importance of self-care and personal identity, hinting at the struggle to balance these with the demands of parenting.
She expresses a personal commitment to ensuring her children feel secure in her love and pride, despite the challenges of doing so consistently.

What To Do When Mom Guilt Slaps You In the Face

There is no such thing as a perfect parent. So just be a real one. — Sue Atkins

I have to get this out, and I have to hurry — fast!

The kids are running, the dog is barking to be let out, the dishwasher just dinged, and not 5 minutes ago the washer stopped its spin cycle and those clothes are still calling me to put them in the dryer.

Ever gotten a nice warm blanket or towel straight out of the dryer and wrapped it right around yourself because you could? It’s a delight.

See, mom guilt is around you everywhere… and if I don’t hustle through this piece right now it may never see the light of day.

Because, clothes, and dogs, and meals and, and, AND….

For God’s sake, can I catch a break to be me?

Maybe… someday….

This is a moment with my mind, no holds barred, and quickly, because if I don’t set a timer and stop when the timer dings, it will never get posted. If you see something that needs to be corrected in my grammar, then send a private note, if you must, otherwise ignore the imperfections and enjoy the story.

Because…

I’m supposed to be writing my book, not this….

My husband just called me out that if I’m not writing book content and testing it, then I am not singularly focused enough to meet the deadline. He’s a good guy. Don’t beat him up. He just wants me to suceed.

But….

But, it’s important enough for any mom out there who is in conflict and wondering:

Am I doing this parenting thing right?

I picked my daughter up from school on Friday and I made her cry for a reason I never expected. But, that was Friday and this is already Monday…

The sun was shining and I took her to the park to let her play. When it was time to go pick my oldest up from school she wanted to climb the fence, but there wasn’t time…. we had to go, right now to be on time for pick-up…

I hugged her and whispered in her ear as I helped her over the fence:

I love you and I’m proud of you.

The kid broke down and cried huge crocodile tears as strong as the torrents of a raging river.

Thank you, Mommy! You’re proud of me, you really are?

I am broken.

How can she not know I am proud of her?

She deserves, at least that, and love, food, and security…

I hug her tighter as I lift her from the ground and hold her tighter all the way to the car. By the time we get there my cheek is wet with her tears and my shirt carries the water spots of what’s over-spilled.

What have I done wrong? How does she not know I am proud of her?

Sometimes I struggle with whether or not to fold clothes, pick up toys. cook meals, or just take a minute to breathe.

As I cuddle her to sleep that night I ask:

Do you really not know I am proud of you?

Sometimes I do, Mommy, and sometimes I don’t…

Do you always know Mommy loves you?

Yes, I always know that.

Then always know Mommy loves you and is proud of you.

What do you need to tell your kids right now that you assume they already know?

Do it today!