4 September 2022

What to Do, What to Do

I have three months to live and… go!

Today’s prompt is worth quoting verbatim:

“If you found out you were going to die in 3 months, how would you spend your time? What would you do?”

At first, we diverge

I never liked the idiomatic phrase “spend time.” Time isn’t a currency, although I am surprised monetizing time hasn’t become a thing.

[N.B. One would think getting paid by the hour qualifies. Wages, however, came into being long before the colloquial meaning of monetizing appeared. Mostly, it refers to making money from something that was previously free or not considered to hold value.]

It’s not that I don’t think time has worth. Otherwise, nothing, including responding to writing prompts, would ever be worthwhile.

My mother is fond of saying that our time is the most valuable gift we can give. She’s right. Being present for someone is a sterling quality (identifying sterling qualities is one of Mom’s favorite pastimes).

[N.B. Pastime in English is a portmanteau of “past time.” Other languages, particularly French, passe-temps, use both original words in full (or pasatiempo in Spanish and passatempo in Portuguese and Italian). One more reason English makes life difficult.]

The vouchers people give others stating they will spend x amount of time with someone in lieu of a tangible gift must have some value. That is, unlike coupons that have no cash value.

Time, strictly speaking, is invaluable due to its ephemeral nature. Time’s value is incalculable (except when you work at Mcdonald's or Starbucks).

Getting to the point

The point is that I much prefer responding to the second iteration of the question. What would I do if I have three months left to live?

The answer came quickly and easily. I pretty much wouldn’t do anything differently than what I do now.

Quoting Mom again, quoting Anonymous (the unknown author, not the cyber ninja activists): “Plan life like you will live forever and live life like you will die tomorrow.”

Putting that philosophy into action has been freeing. It doesn’t mean I have been reckless. I have been much clearer in choosing yes or no when making decisions. Once a decision is made, banish any regrets.

It helps not to have an employer. My day is what I make it in tandem with what my husband is doing or needs.

Living life like I will die tomorrow includes being able to look back upon each day and see what I have accomplished that provided me or others with greater serenity and contentment.

It helps to have role models

Before Mom started using that proverb, I saw it in action with a couple of men about 15 years older than I who lived with lung cancer until they couldn’t.

I also saw it with my stepdad. His last cancer diagnosis gave him three or four months to live. Thanks to a new treatment, he lived more than two years. There were times he didn’t look like he would make it. Regardless, he was ready to live forever or die the next day.

Sam adopted the philosophy when he was 19 years old. He was in the Army in the Pacific during WWII. Getting shot at by the Japanese made him realize that he needed to live every day as though it was his last. Recovering from being wounded twice and receiving the Bronze Star made him realize that he could have a long future ahead and that he had better find things to do with himself.

He lived to be 88.