Free AI web copilot to create summaries, insights and extended knowledge, download it at here

Abstract

22">Just after graduating, I did not have an accountability partner. All my friends have just started a job, and they were enjoying the hedonist lifestyle of party and booze. I was trying to focus on my health instead because that’s what my father taught me whole life: education and health.Since I couldn’t find anyone to do the morning routine, I tried self-accountability. It requires a lot of self-control, which means more effort that may or may not be sustainable in the long term. So, if you are also having a problem with self-control, then this article is for you.<h1 id="b51a">Use multiple time constraints to keep you on track</h1>The more strict constraints you have, the more focussed you are while working. For example, I write one blog every day. For that, I need at least 30 minutes to create the first draft.But that’s not it. I am used to waking up in the morning, and if I can’t find time for writing in the morning, the motivation dies, and I postpone the entire day just thinking about how I wasted my morning.As I mentioned above, my first constraint was to write one blog every day. It gives me so many options that I was confused about which time block to use.Then I made my constraint even harder — write after waking up. I wake up at 4 AM and do strength workout at 7 AM. Since I have a personal trainer, I cannot skip the exercise because of the scheduling system. I cannot cancel the class under 3 hours from the scheduled time.Now I have three hours to finish the first draft.Finding 30 minutes is still tricky because a lot of options are still available in the 3 hours period.Then I came up with an idea which I am improving upon daily.<ul><li>Wake-up at 4 or 4.30 AM</li><li>Finish the daily chores like laundry, freshening up and preparing a pre-workout meal</li><li>Finish any unfinished work problem ( no new ones ) from the last day if it takes less time</li><li>Read on Kindle. It improves my vocabulary in blogs.</li><li>Start writing the first draft around 6 AM and finish before 6:40</li><li>Now celebrate for 20 minutes because I have checked off another day in the calendar.</li></ul><h1 id="a5ef">Don’t forget to reward yourself</h1>The two sets of activities are significant here—the ones I do before writing and the 20-minute break.The break is to stretch

Options

the writing time if I want to research more and if I am satisfied with 20 minutes ( which rarely happens ) left, I listen to music. The period before 6 AM is to prep my mind in an organised state. All the activities I do before writing clears the mental clutter to help me focus on words. Notably, the laundry one because I am obsessed with organisation and tidiness.The fixed constraint that helps me to set up my morning accordingly is the 7 AM workout. It also acts as a reward for me. I finish the first draft before 6:40, make any minor changes that are on top of my head and get ready for my workout.<h1 id="33ec">Final words</h1>After finishing so many essential activities in the morning, you’ll have a positive mindset to accomplish new tasks with high energy. So, if you are struggling to find an accountability partner because you are on the introvert spectrum, couldn’t find anyone motivated enough or have a false idea that the need for an accountability partner is a sign of weakness, use the constraints above to make the goal as specific as possible and define the process of the main task. As long it takes around 30 minutes every day, the planning is worth it, and you’ll see the effects in the long run.As long as you do an activity at the same time every day, your mind will associate that time with the corresponding action. If you enjoy it, the routine will gradually become a ritual. For example, if you do workout every day at 7 AM for an hour and you are about to skip one day, the FOMO will drive you to push for at least 10 or 20 minutes. And before you know it, you might even finish an hour.Getting started will always be the hard part. When you have someone motivated to practice with you, great! Otherwise, impose severe but satisfying constraints. Working with a specific target will show you a sign of progress. And that’s what matters — a little progress every day which compounds in the long run.This blog is 149th in my streak of daily writing since March 25, day 1 of the nationwide lockdown in India. There was a big break after day 125, somewhere around the last week of July. Now, the next target is 150, and here is the <a href="https://sanjeevai.medium.com/21-90-rule-combined-with-seinfeld-strategy-df9f7457dc11">first one</a> that started the best habit of 2020.Thank you for reading!~ Sanjeev</article></body>

What To Do If You Can’t Find an Accountability Partner in Habit Development

Because self-control doesn’t work in the long run.

If you read only a few books

After a lot of research, recommendations and reading blogs about habit development, I read two books — Atomic Habits and The Miracle Morning. I was able to apply almost all the lessons shared in them. I was already using some practices mentioned in the books but didn’t know the psychology behind them. These two books are poster boys if you want to read about habit development.

They have a lot of actionable tips. Since the influential self-help books are practical, you’ll have to give time to see visible results. Before I got Atomic Habits, I was already eight months into my habit development journey. After reading it, I gained further insights into how to make the process more manageable in the long run.

Importance of accountability partner

One topic in common in both the books was accountability partner. The best example I can relate to is a personal fitness trainer. Those who do not have a personal trainer, I am not even going to convince you about its positives. Still, I will show you what an accountability partner does and why it makes the journey of habit development fun. Especially, if you are trying to quit a bad habit ( I know what you’re thinking ), an accountability partner can help you get through.

Thinking about having an accountability partner does not mean that you lack motivation or are afraid to pursue the journey yourself. It just means you want to to share the transformation with someone who has similar goals. Having similar intentions means you will hold each other responsible whenever someone tries to pull out.

It is also about building relationships. One accountability partner can help you in various areas once you get to know them closely.

Trying self-accountability

Just after graduating, I did not have an accountability partner. All my friends have just started a job, and they were enjoying the hedonist lifestyle of party and booze. I was trying to focus on my health instead because that’s what my father taught me whole life: education and health.

Since I couldn’t find anyone to do the morning routine, I tried self-accountability. It requires a lot of self-control, which means more effort that may or may not be sustainable in the long term. So, if you are also having a problem with self-control, then this article is for you.

Use multiple time constraints to keep you on track

The more strict constraints you have, the more focussed you are while working. For example, I write one blog every day. For that, I need at least 30 minutes to create the first draft.

But that’s not it. I am used to waking up in the morning, and if I can’t find time for writing in the morning, the motivation dies, and I postpone the entire day just thinking about how I wasted my morning.

As I mentioned above, my first constraint was to write one blog every day. It gives me so many options that I was confused about which time block to use.

Then I made my constraint even harder — write after waking up. I wake up at 4 AM and do strength workout at 7 AM. Since I have a personal trainer, I cannot skip the exercise because of the scheduling system. I cannot cancel the class under 3 hours from the scheduled time.

Now I have three hours to finish the first draft.

Finding 30 minutes is still tricky because a lot of options are still available in the 3 hours period.

Then I came up with an idea which I am improving upon daily.

Wake-up at 4 or 4.30 AM
Finish the daily chores like laundry, freshening up and preparing a pre-workout meal
Finish any unfinished work problem ( no new ones ) from the last day if it takes less time
Read on Kindle. It improves my vocabulary in blogs.
Start writing the first draft around 6 AM and finish before 6:40
Now celebrate for 20 minutes because I have checked off another day in the calendar.

Don’t forget to reward yourself

The two sets of activities are significant here—the ones I do before writing and the 20-minute break.

The break is to stretch the writing time if I want to research more and if I am satisfied with 20 minutes ( which rarely happens ) left, I listen to music. The period before 6 AM is to prep my mind in an organised state. All the activities I do before writing clears the mental clutter to help me focus on words. Notably, the laundry one because I am obsessed with organisation and tidiness.

The fixed constraint that helps me to set up my morning accordingly is the 7 AM workout. It also acts as a reward for me. I finish the first draft before 6:40, make any minor changes that are on top of my head and get ready for my workout.

Final words

After finishing so many essential activities in the morning, you’ll have a positive mindset to accomplish new tasks with high energy. So, if you are struggling to find an accountability partner because you are on the introvert spectrum, couldn’t find anyone motivated enough or have a false idea that the need for an accountability partner is a sign of weakness, use the constraints above to make the goal as specific as possible and define the process of the main task. As long it takes around 30 minutes every day, the planning is worth it, and you’ll see the effects in the long run.

As long as you do an activity at the same time every day, your mind will associate that time with the corresponding action. If you enjoy it, the routine will gradually become a ritual. For example, if you do workout every day at 7 AM for an hour and you are about to skip one day, the FOMO will drive you to push for at least 10 or 20 minutes. And before you know it, you might even finish an hour.

Getting started will always be the hard part. When you have someone motivated to practice with you, great! Otherwise, impose severe but satisfying constraints. Working with a specific target will show you a sign of progress. And that’s what matters — a little progress every day which compounds in the long run.

This blog is 149th in my streak of daily writing since March 25, day 1 of the nationwide lockdown in India. There was a big break after day 125, somewhere around the last week of July. Now, the next target is 150, and here is the first one that started the best habit of 2020.

Thank you for reading!

~ Sanjeev