What To Do if It’s a Brand New Year But The Same Old You
Two simple things will help you if you’ve already blown your resolutions
I bet the Change Your Life fairies didn’t show up at your New Year’s party.
“I’m going to get up early and start exercising for the new year!” said everyone on December 31st.
“Go away. I’m hungover and still sleepy,” said everyone at noon on January 1st.
I’m certain you’re not reading this while lacing up your running shoes or grabbing your keys to drive to the gym. You may feel you’ve already lost your chance to get started just by sleeping in. The worst part will be your guilt, knowing you’ve already blown it.
You may have put so much expectation on January 1st that when the day arrived, you weren’t ready. You had no plan, just grand ideas on how to improve yourself.
To make matters worse, once the key date has passed, you’ll either set a new date you’ll ignore (I’ll start next Monday) or not even bother.
Fortunately for you, there is good news.
The most important thing you can tell yourself is that the date doesn’t matter.
It never mattered. Your body doesn’t care whether you start exercising on the first or the 17th.
Your mind might tell you it matters, but if you just start, six months from now it won’t care about the exact date either.
Your brain will fight this idea. It will want to drag you back into your hole of sitting on the couch and death-scrolling. It will do everything it can, like it always does, to stop you from making changes. It will resist your key dates.
I got around it the hard way.
I was stuck three years ago. I hated where my life was.
My former employer pushed me into a role I wasn’t suited for as they tried to survive the pandemic. I suddenly had to deal with angry customers and a toxic environment daily.
It would be easy to blame them for the depression I felt and easy to blame them for the weight I gained. However, it eventually became clear the problem was me. I needed to retake control of my own life.
However, I made a mistake in September when I set a date of January 1st to leave my job.
I never made it.
There was a day in October when a customer screamed the F-bomb at me over and over, inches from my face. When they left, I had a meltdown. It was no longer about wanting to leave but about having to.
It was then I realized the January date meant nothing. I learned that milestone days can work against you. They can keep you locked into a situation longer than is healthy.
If you miss the date, it can fill you with guilt and keep you from trying again.
The answer is in two parts. The first is this:
Take a step. Right now.
I’m not saying you should immediately leave your job and responsibilities. I stayed at my job another couple of weeks while I put in place what I needed to do next. However, I left it on my timeline and not because the calendar told me to.
I’m not saying to rush in and try to do everything all at once — a classic mistake that will overwhelm you.
I’m saying take a step, even if it’s small, even if it’s nothing but make a list of what you want to achieve.
Maybe your first step could be finding a helpful resource, like buying Mini-Habits by Stephen Guise or Atomic Habits by James Clear (Not affiliate links) and committing to reading a chapter daily.
The second part begins with a question.
What’s the most important step a person can make?
The answer is not “the first one.”
The true answer is “the next one.”
Continuing to take the next step forward leads to the change you hope for.
I don’t remember the exact date I started my change, but three years later, I’m in good shape and doing the two things I most enjoy: writing and voice acting. Ignoring the calendar kept me from waiting to move forward.
You’ll be told how real change comes from purpose, strategy, and consistency, but none of that will matter if you don’t take the first step and, more importantly, the next one.
