What “Priscilla” and “Jaws” Can Teach about Opening Your Story
4 opening scenes that reveal how to write a killer first paragraph and suck a reader in
An opening scene should suck you in and reveal enough to intrigue but not enough to give the game away. Whether creating a blockbuster film or an online article, the writer is a magician, artfully directing the audience’s attention towards exactly what to focus on.
In high school I learned archaic ideas about how to write an essay. Ideas with little teeth in an online world.
Online, you have a narrow opportunity — one that needs to pull the reader in and not let go. Much like the jaws of a great white shark.
Let’s examine four contrasting films and their opening scenes — Romeo and Juliet, The Adventures of Priscilla Queen of the Desert, The Social Network, and Jaws.
I chose these films because each of their opening scenes presents a unique quality to consider in creating an opening paragraph.
4. Romeo and Juliet
Baz Luhrmann had a task on his hands with Romeo and Juliet. He had to break the audience out of their slumberous Shakespearean preconceptions. If he started with the classic opening, he would have lost the audience:
Two households, both alike in dignity, In fair Verona, where we lay our scene, From ancient grudge break to new mutiny Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
Instead, he made Shakespeare as relatable as possible, by setting up a battle in a suburban gas station. He incorporated slapstick humour and gave a nod to the Western as a familiar genre, all supported by a cool guitar soundtrack.
Sometimes, as writers, we tackle topics that others have written about extensively. How many more times are you going to click on an article about Marie Kondo, imposter syndrome, or Ikigai?
Tackling age-old topics requires coming at it from a different angle. The opening paragraph needs to snap the audience out of their slumber and present the topic in a new way.
3. The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert
A film about a bunch of drag queens was going to be a tough sell in 1994. Again, writer Stephan Elliott had to break the mould of people’s understanding of drag.
Unlike some of the more flamboyant numbers later in the film, the film opens with the emotional ballad “I’ve Never Been to Me.” This pitch-perfect song reflected the journey the characters were about to go on.
Elliott chose to humanise the character of Mitzi in the opening— focusing on her relatable inner struggles and yearnings rather than the gaudy facade the audience may have associated with drag.
While the film incorporates music, costume, and sharp humour, the story is a deeply revealing exploration into what it means to be belong and feel welcome in society.
Great creative nonfiction has vulnerability and heart. It’s not enough to wait until some later point in the story to touch that space. Revealing one’s inner struggle from the get-go allows the reader to know they are in safe hands with what they are going to read.
When writing from a deeply personal space, think about how to reveal your deepest vulnerability in the opening paragraph.
2. The Social Network
Aaron Sorkin had a unique challenge in telling Mark Zuckerberg’s story, as the viewer already had some prior knowledge about what the story would be about.
He strategically chose the opening scene not to be the most dramatic, but to direct the audience’s attention to what they should focus on.
In the opening scene a girl breaks up with Zuckerberg in a way that reveals his deepest character flaws. Focusing on Zuckerberg’s social and emotional flaws, it tells the audience that this is where he wants them to pay attention.
The film is less about the rise of Facebook or Zuckerberg’s entrepreneurial success. It is about how he struggles to relate to people.
“You are probably going to be a very successful computer person. But you’re going to go through life thinking that girls don’t like you because you’re a nerd. And I want you to know from the bottom of my heart that that won’t be true. It’ll be because you’re an asshole.” — Ex-girlfriend to Zuckerberg
When thinking about opening an article, consider where you want your audience to pay attention.
If you choose a familiar subject — even, dare I say, Ikigai — think less about the topic and more about where you want your reader’s attention to go.
If you are speaking from your own life’s experience, what aspect of you or the story do you want to draw attention to?
1. Jaws
A group of friends are having a quiet summer beach party. Chrissie innocently goes for a swim and meets the primary threat of the film. Chrissie never returns.
The whole seen takes less than three minutes. At no point do you see a shark and no detail is given away. While the movie title and poster may have revealed the threat, so much is left to the imagination to fill in the blanks.
In academic essay writing, the introduction gives the game away. We were taught to tell the reader, in advance, what’s going to happen.
In creative nonfiction, especially online, you want to tease the audience so they are intrigued to read on. They kind of know what’s coming, but they need to find out how it ends.
The 4 principles in recap:
- When telling a familiar story, come at it from a new angle. Break the mould and let the audience know from the get-go that you are going to take them in a new direction. (Baz Luhrmann’s Romeo and Juliet)
- Reveal the heart of what’s at stake. Don’t leave your vulnerability to become a subplot — make it the focus of your story. (Priscilla)
- Direct your audience’s attention to where they should put their focus, especially when telling an already-familiar tale. (The Social Network)
- Don’t reveal too much. Tease your audience with just enough and give them some suspense for what is to come. (Jaws)
The article above is not, in any way, a reflection of a personal mastery over writing a great opening paragraph. I woke up at 3am thinking about my favourite opening scenes. It was an idea worthy of unpacking on my quest to hone my craft.
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