What Made Me Leave My Home Country?

Summary

The author left their home country of Albania to pursue a master's degree in Germany, driven by childhood goals, a desire for independence, societal nonconformity, educational aspirations, and the wish to explore new cultures.

Abstract

The author has been living in Munich, Germany, for a year and a half, where they are continuing their master's education. This decision to leave Albania was influenced by several factors: a longstanding goal instilled by their father, who believed in the benefits of living abroad; a personal quest for true independence beyond the structured life of their youth; a feeling of not fitting into Albanian society due to differing values and a desire for meritocracy; the pursuit of better educational opportunities, although not the primary motivator; and a passion for cultural exploration and personal growth. The author reflects on their experiences with contentment and has no immediate plans to return to Albania, despite a desire to contribute to their home country's development in the future.

Opinions

The author's father, having lived abroad, wished for his children to experience life in more developed countries.
The author values independence and felt constrained by the regimented lifestyle during their early education in Albania.
There is a perception that the Albanian society operates on principles of servility and nepotism, which conflicts with the author's values of honesty and meritocracy.
The author does not view their departure from Albania solely as a quest for better education but also as an escape from societal norms.
The author believes in the importance of experiencing other cultures to foster personal growth, open-mindedness, and acceptance.
Despite the author's contentment with their life abroad, they express a willingness to contribute to Albania's development, indicating a sense of responsibility and connection to their home country.

And decide to study in Germany

It has been one year and a half since I moved to Germany, Munich to be specific, so I could continue my master's degree. Looking back, it has been a great experience and I’d do it all over again. But why did I decide to leave my country in the first place anyway?

Movie flying house ‘Up’ Poster Wall Painting Decorative Art Picture Paint On Canvas Prints (Painter unknown)

1. A goal I had since I was a child

Growing up, I was told by my father to study hard so one day I could leave my home country, Albania. Somehow he always wished for me and my brother to leave our country, and that wish soon became my goal in life. My father had lived for some time abroad, and he had seen the difference between other developed countries and Albania. Albania is a developing country and there is no secret that the economic situation is not the best. Like every parent who wants the best for his child, he wanted the best for me too, and the best was clearly not in my country according to him. I also had the chance to travel as a kid and to visit other countries, and even though I was really young and could not analyze things clearly, I realized my dad was kind of right. Things looked better abroad, cleaner, more organized, and developed. I made up my mind, one day I was going to leave Albania.

2. My desire to be independent

I left home when I was 15, to study in the capital of Albania. But that doesn’t mean I became independent at that age. I had my day programmed. Breakfast, lectures with 15 minutes break in between, lunch break, again lectures, nap time(or not), dinner, study, sleep. Sometimes there would be some fun activities too. If I wanted to leave the building, I could do so once per week and go home on the weekends. I do not think this lifestyle makes somebody independent. I had everything arranged for me. It gave me discipline, but not independence. After the first year of living in the dorm, I moved in with my parents, and finally, I felt as I could breathe. Thankfully, I had some control over my life again. I lived with my parents till my graduation and at some point, I just wanted to live on my own. Living with parents is cool, you don’t have to worry much about washing clothes or cooking. However, I was craving space and taking care of my own responsibilities. I wanted to live alone.

3. I didn’t quite fit in the society

Now, if I would choose one reason why I left my country, I think this would be the one. I realized early on that most often than not, I would not find myself in the conversations happening around me, in the mindset of people, in the way things worked back in Albania. My mom always used to tell me that my problem was that I was too honest and I always wanted things to be fair and merit-based, but that’s not how you win in Albania. That would frustrate me, really, and it still does. Simply the fact that I wanted things to go the right way was considered a problem, which would frustrate me. I’ve seen servility, “friendships” and money buying grades, degrees, and jobs. That’s just not part of my values in life, that’s not how my belief system works and I am not willing to give that up to fit in society. And as I already mentioned, I didn’t find myself in the conversations happening around me. There were a lot of small talks and closed-minded opinions. I was often perceived as too ambitious, career-oriented, hardworking, and that “I needed to chill more often”. It is funny how I was perceived to be the problem in society, maybe because I was a minority. I clearly had to leave and find my own type of people.

4. A better education

I studied in one of the bests Albanian high schools and universities, so I don’t really complain about my education. I also had some great times during my university, having been active in student clubs and the student council. Many would think that education would be my most important reason to move to another country, but it was not. Yes, a better education was for sure a reason, but not what made me buy the flight ticket to Germany. It was rather an excuse to escape.

5. Exploration of new cultures and countries

I believe that in order to become more accepting of others, less judgmental and open-minded, one has to travel and experience other cultures. This way we grow more on a personal level. Just because right now I am living in Germany, it doesn’t mean I will live here for the rest of my life. I like to explore, get out of my comfort zone and grow as a person.

Do I plan to return and live in my country? No. At least not anytime soon. It would take me another article to explain to you why. However, would I like to do something for my country? Yes, I would love to. Not because I see it as obligatory, but because I believe there are many ways to invest in a developing country. Many possibilities to have an impact on people’s lives. However, right now I still have a lot of experience and knowledge to get. There are still many opportunities and places in the world to explore.

I believe that home is not the place one was born at, but rather is the place that fulfills one’s needs, the place one feels good living in. Do I miss my home? Right now, no. Do I miss my family and friends? To be honest, not that much. I am rather focused on enjoying my life right now, where I am. And that’s what I’m doing.