What Lie Confuses Your Relationship?

Luring myths in most relationships.

Sometimes, it’s funny how the heart will gravitate so much towards an individual whom it has no memory of in the past. Love is a non healable bruise, which sores gradually or heals the more, as you get attached to your partner/fiancée, boyfriend, or girlfriend.

My philosophy is that love is like a bruise in one’s heart that gets sore when the person you love doesn’t pick your call, or doesn’t reciprocate your emotions and feelings for them. But heals every other time they show an amount of their love for you.

Philosophers and counselors have at some point proposed some activities that are said to be the grounding effects for a stable relationship. They are more than a hundred of them, but I would only buttress but a few of them in this post.

1] Commit your relationship into the hands of God:

Only a few people could boast of practicing this activity when they met their partners or got into a new relationship. It is believed that once you commit all of your endeavors to the hands of the lord, it will surely play out well. But then, what if they are not the right person for you? It is a rather natural and up heal act for believers in relationships to involve God in their affairs. This might as well be an advantage or a disadvantage for them. But it sure doesn’t guarantee that he or she wouldn’t make you burn in your own words.

Involving God in your relationship does not guarantee that your partner would not have extra affairs with someone outside your relationship or share the spoils of your affairs with others. God doesn’t do evil with intentions, but it is believed by some people that the limit of a relationship can be stretched if grounded in the words of God.

2] Ask about their childhood:

On your first date, if he/she told you they grew up in the projects, you would definitely have your reservations about them. This is believed to help you know the ways in which you would approach and interact with them. One’s childhood does say a lot about how the individual will possibly react to things and situations. It could be a turnoff factor for some people, while others wouldn’t change their thoughts no matter the kind of childhood their partner had. Some also believe that when people reveal their childhood, they tend to expose some of their past guilt, which could be an advantage to anyone trying to win their heart.

Surprisingly, there are people who have had bad experiences from their childhood and should know better, but they are still the ones causing the most difficulties in relationships.

3] Communication:

This is a convincing factor that should ordinarily be the best and dominating effect for a healthy relationship. The rhythm of constant words from the two parties should naturally make them in sync with one another and continually help heal their hearts. The effects of communication could be felt so well that when you don’t talk to each other for some days, it would feel as though your heart is tripping off at substantial times.

Some would argue that communication is the fuel of any relationship. But have you ever thought of married people who get divorced?

The unfiltered talks they have had with one another, the daily heart-to-heart confessions. Hell! They even live together, but all of this is not enough glue to hold them together. Constant talk with one another is a basic factor in a healthy relationship, but it is only but a myth if categorized as being the most effective.

4] Commitment:

As exempt as it feels, being committed to someone can make you have a stable relationship. But do you know it is possible to find perfection with someone else even when you are committed to another? Vows and commitment are the basis to which trust is held in any relationship, and being committed to someone should be but the only factor needed to uphold a healthy relationship.

Nevertheless, it could prove futile when you are tested with perfection from another person. When the perfect person has all the shortcomings of your current partner as their strengths when he/she is more handsome or beautiful than your current partner, when he or she is richer than your current partner. On this basis, commitment will fail awfully. Even when you don’t want to allow yourself to fall for them, your thoughts and body could defer your wants.

5] Be friends with his/her friends:

This myth is commonly believed by girls/ladies, whereby they feel that if they are friends with the friend of their partner, they would be at a specific zone of preference on his side and might also help them to spot certain decisions at varying times.

Girl! His friends will fool you so well that you would feel you solely own the heart of your man. They have been scenarios where the man’s friend would help lie about them going for specified meetings or work-related seminars while, in the actual sense, they are going out to flirt with other girls. This is the fakest of all the myths. The chances of grounding your position in his/her heart by being friends with his/her friend are quite minimal.

6] Buying her gifts and treats:

We all have that one thing that gets to us when spotted correctly. If you get a gift from someone at equivalent times, it would surely illuminate your heart in such a way that the person will own a special space in your heart. But this is not all true. Maybe it is in the older generations who weren’t fortunate enough to travel and explore so much.

In the current generation, where there a million places to go and a million choices of treats to select from. Getting a gift for your partner would not cut it for being the owner of your partner’s heart. A renowned counselor once said that no matter how rich you are, there is always someone who is richer than you are. Therefore, no matter the gift you get for your partner, there is always a better the same category.

7] Apology:

Sometimes I wonder the extent to which the effect of bullying could be felt in the society.

A healthy relationship would surely entail the parties wanting to be the first to say sorry after a misunderstanding. This is a good activity, but it is also a myth as it does not guarantee your relationship to be effortlessly successful.

You could be the first to apologize a million times and still get a re-occurrence of the event which brought about the misunderstanding by the other party. When the activity of wanting to apologize first is mostly advocated by one person in the relationship, it tends to put the person in the position of been bullied by the other party.

To be the first to apologize, does add up to having a healthy relationship. But when it becomes the uttermost act of one person, he/she would surely get bullied and it could result in what some call a ‘one-sided relationship’. Therefore it doesn’t always work out when you apologize first.

In spite of all this, I feel that the greatest and only bearing factor to finding and sticking to the one is a matter of CHOICE. If he/she does not choose you, there are no amount of mythological acts of love that would cement your relationship with them.

A tincture of the above myths and lies will surely act and play roles in the solidification of your relationship, but the main factor to which all of these is effective is the choice of your partner.

It doesn’t matter if you are unlovable or you don’t look good to yourself, if he/she chooses you; not even the words and clamor of his/her family can deter their love for you.

So it is best to wish that he chooses you in the nook of his heart where no one has access to and that she chooses you in the roughest purlieu of her heart where no one knows of. Otherwise, the whole circle will begin right again with someone else.