avatarGary David Flamberg

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1936

Abstract

<p id="0801">Not only do we force our phones to go with us. We also force them to hear what we say…often right into their “faces!”</p><ul><li><i>What if, every time I chewed out a customer service rep, at the end of the call I didn’t get an offer for a survey — but rather a rebuke from the very device I’d just used to transmit that salty language?</i></li><li><b><i>What if every lie I told resulted in me getting a loud, verbal “fact check” from my phone?</i></b></li><li><i>What if, every time I yelled at my wife for no reason, I heard a pesky little automated voice asking me what the heck I was thinking?</i></li></ul><h2 id="8b6f">What if they could see us?</h2><figure id="60d4"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/1*7IdaDibWUy3JogZ9LZm66A.jpeg"><figcaption>A phone with eyes looking back at me. (Image created by the author in Craiyon.)</figcaption></figure><p id="a3c7">What if, as we mercilessly force them to be by our side 24–7, they could <i>see </i>what we were doing? Think of the inquiries we’d get…such as:</p><ul><li><i>“Why are you looking at those salacious photos behind your wife’s back?”</i></li><li><i>“Why are you popping that pill again?”</i></li><li><i>“Why are you reaching for the bottle again?”</i></li></ul><h2 id="ea13">What if they could feel us?</h2><p id="90ba">Worse yet: <i>what if they could feel our emotions? </i>Don’t even go there with me. Do I really want my phone to take on the role of pocket psychologist?</p><p id="4c89">Really, though, if they had the senses we humanoids do, they could pick up on our “vibes.” <i>They’ll know when something’s off-kilter. They’ll sense it when we’re “faking it” in front of our kids…our employer…or our date whom we’re trying to impress. They’d feel our pain.</i></p><p id="78e4">I could go on, but I think you get the picture.</p><h2 id="1dcf">What if they could counsel us?</h2><p id="c56d">If our phones could hear, see, a # Options nd feel us…why not have them counsel us?</p><p id="ddc5">Think about it: if they know us intimately, why not trust their advice in some of our big decisions?</p><p id="28ea">I tell my phone what my dilemma is. I let it know the personal details behind the decision as well as any pros and cons, and…voila…my phone will:</p><ul><li><i>advise me on what stocks my wife and I should invest in;</i></li><li><i>tell me when we should sell our house and move (and tell us what house to move into);</i></li><li><i>counsel exactly how and when to make up to my wife after an argument;</i></li><li><i>give me the best ideas (and titles) for my next 5 Medium posts!</i></li></ul><p id="5e2b">Man, I like this option! It would take the guesswork out of life — and along with it a lot of stress and heartache.</p><blockquote id="a883"><p>Should I then consider having my phone — or my wife’s — give her and me some marital counseling?</p></blockquote><p id="5ede">Uh…no! That would DEFINITELY be a bridge too far — in my book.</p><h2 id="05a1">Thank God none of this is possible…yet!</h2><p id="d5a9">Maybe there’s some software out there that can do a lot of this stuff right now. Being the ancient baby boomer I am, I’m not on top of every little gadget twist-and-turn out there.</p><p id="a9c5">As far as I know, none of this is possible yet. I don’t know of a phone that can actually question us about:</p><ul><li>what we do — and why;</li><li>where we go;</li><li>why do we talk to our loved ones with <i>that</i> tone of voice;</li><li>why we’re angry or sad.</li></ul><p id="161e">And trust me, I don’t want that.</p><blockquote id="1ac2"><p>The whole thing would be a bridge too far!</p></blockquote><p id="30f5" type="7">What I do want — what I NEED — is human companionship. I need human accountability. I need human love. I need the Divine Touch.</p><p id="1715" type="7">No phone can or will ever replace that. Ever.</p></article></body>

What If Our Phones Could Talk Back to Us — ON THEIR OWN?!?

It might make for some VERY interesting conversation!

My phone talking to me — OK, it’s not MY phone and it’s not ME! (Image created by the author in Bing AI.)

The other day this thought popped into my mind:

“If my phone could talk to me, what would it say? What questions would it ask?

Do I really want to know the answer?

What if they could complain about our treatment of them?

Me dragging my phone everywhere. (Image created by the author in Bing AI.)

Many if not most of us carry our phones wherever we go. I hate to admit this, but I even look at it in the bathroom (well, sometimes)! The only place I dare not take it is to my nightstand before bed. (Just looking at your phone before bed can mess with your sleep. How much more sleeping next to it???)

So maybe the first question we’d be asked is: “Why are you forcing me to go with you everywhere? Don’t I get a choice in the matter?”

What if they could hear us?

A phone with ears. (Image created by the author in Bing AI.)

Not only do we force our phones to go with us. We also force them to hear what we say…often right into their “faces!”

  • What if, every time I chewed out a customer service rep, at the end of the call I didn’t get an offer for a survey — but rather a rebuke from the very device I’d just used to transmit that salty language?
  • What if every lie I told resulted in me getting a loud, verbal “fact check” from my phone?
  • What if, every time I yelled at my wife for no reason, I heard a pesky little automated voice asking me what the heck I was thinking?

What if they could see us?

A phone with eyes looking back at me. (Image created by the author in Craiyon.)

What if, as we mercilessly force them to be by our side 24–7, they could see what we were doing? Think of the inquiries we’d get…such as:

  • “Why are you looking at those salacious photos behind your wife’s back?”
  • “Why are you popping that pill again?”
  • “Why are you reaching for the bottle again?”

What if they could feel us?

Worse yet: what if they could feel our emotions? Don’t even go there with me. Do I really want my phone to take on the role of pocket psychologist?

Really, though, if they had the senses we humanoids do, they could pick up on our “vibes.” They’ll know when something’s off-kilter. They’ll sense it when we’re “faking it” in front of our kids…our employer…or our date whom we’re trying to impress. They’d feel our pain.

I could go on, but I think you get the picture.

What if they could counsel us?

If our phones could hear, see, and feel us…why not have them counsel us?

Think about it: if they know us intimately, why not trust their advice in some of our big decisions?

I tell my phone what my dilemma is. I let it know the personal details behind the decision as well as any pros and cons, and…voila…my phone will:

  • advise me on what stocks my wife and I should invest in;
  • tell me when we should sell our house and move (and tell us what house to move into);
  • counsel exactly how and when to make up to my wife after an argument;
  • give me the best ideas (and titles) for my next 5 Medium posts!

Man, I like this option! It would take the guesswork out of life — and along with it a lot of stress and heartache.

Should I then consider having my phone — or my wife’s — give her and me some marital counseling?

Uh…no! That would DEFINITELY be a bridge too far — in my book.

Thank God none of this is possible…yet!

Maybe there’s some software out there that can do a lot of this stuff right now. Being the ancient baby boomer I am, I’m not on top of every little gadget twist-and-turn out there.

As far as I know, none of this is possible yet. I don’t know of a phone that can actually question us about:

  • what we do — and why;
  • where we go;
  • why do we talk to our loved ones with that tone of voice;
  • why we’re angry or sad.

And trust me, I don’t want that.

The whole thing would be a bridge too far!

What I do want — what I NEED — is human companionship. I need human accountability. I need human love. I need the Divine Touch.

No phone can or will ever replace that. Ever.

Cell Phones
Life Lessons
Humans And Machines
Relationships
Illumination
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