What If It Gets Taken Away From You?

How much do you want the things you have — you know, your clothes, your electronic gizmos, your lifestyle?

Just because these things “are there”, it doesn’t mean you want or need them.

There’s a lot to be said for the saying:

“You don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.”

But you’re probably holding onto parts of your life you assume are important — but really aren’t.

You’ll only get to realize that fact when they are, well, gone.

It’s just stuff

A case in point for me. Many years ago I went to a bachelor party in Barcelona. Ten guys, going crazy over a long weekend. It was awesome.

We flew back to Gatwick Airport in the UK on a budget airline. As everyone collected their bags at the carousel it didn’t take long to realize my bag was missing. The airline had lost it. I was livid.

A few weeks later I received a call from the airline to say my bag had been found and they would forward it to me. It never turned up. They had lost it for a second and final time.

I was livid. I had taken some of my coolest clothes on that trip. And then they were gone.

It took me a few days to process this “second” loss. And I soon realized it didn’t matter. Sure, it would cost money but I could replace most of the clothes. Those items I thought had sentimental value didn’t. I’ve long since forgotten what they even looked like.

Those things were taken away from me. But in losing them, I realized they didn’t matter.

Holding on “just because”

Then there was my ex-girlfriend, Pamela.

We dated for nearly a year. We were in our mid-twenties and neither had experienced a relationship beyond a few months. It was a pairing of convenience. We were each other’s placeholder.

We stayed together as long as we did just to prove to ourselves we were “normal.” But things were painfully fraught for much of our time together.

Pamela ended it and it was a relief to both of us. Not long after, we had a night out together. It was the best night ever. We were like good friends, having fun.

We both realized, months too late, that we didn’t want a relationship with each other at all. We had been holding on because we didn’t want to be single.

When I was dumped, the relationship was taken away from me. My safety blanket was gone. But in my loss, I realized it didn’t matter.

Let it go

Life’s a lot more complex than my simplified, bite-sized examples. But we can all find areas to let go of.

Applying “non-attachment” to areas of your life is fine in theory, but much harder in reality. Letting go — of items, your identity, or a way of life — can be hard. It can also be powerful.

So, look around you.

If you can be honest with yourself you’ll realize that not everything you “own” matters. You don’t have to hold onto everything.

Maybe you only get to see how liberating it can be when it’s taken away from you. Yes, it might be uncomfortable. But perhaps that’s what’s required to show you what truly matters.

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