What I Found Out About Myself When I Was Falsely Accused
How to overcome when the world is against you.
Richard, we will call you in three days, letting you know if you’re terminated or not, Rudy said.
Do I at least get to tell my side of the story, I wondered.
I was about to lose my job, and I don’t wish it on anybody. I discovered three relationships I needed, and these three will help you, too.
How you work through the unjustness will either make you or break you.
So, this is what happened. Actual names have been changed to protect true identities.
I went to work, not knowing I would have three anxious days ahead of me. It was 1976. I had a good-paying job. Job had super benefits until that fateful hour when my supervisor, Rudy, called me into his office.
“Richard, we’re putting you on a three-day unpaid suspension because you were the cause of an accident that injured a co-worker.”
“Rudy, what are you talking about?” I asked in disbelief.
“We’ll investigate. Now go lock up your tools then leave the building. We will call you in three days, to let you know if you’re terminated or not,” Rudy said.
“But first, tell me who got injured and when, since I have no idea what you are talking about,” I pleaded.
“It was Glenn, the parts inspector. He said you pulled on his cart, causing him to fall, injuring his knee, he’s filing for disability,” Rudy said.
These three days of uncertainty revealed an inner strength I was not aware that I had. As I walked out of the factory, I entered ‘The Twilight Zone.’ Joshua Press writes about this in The Dark Night of the Soul. “Ultimately, something shakes you out of your day to day limited perception of life.”
My perception of life up to this moment was, ‘everything’s coming up roses.’ Everythings were going to be fine, but now it wasn’t, not at all for me. For me to say, I was shaken by what happened would be an understatement for sure.
If I’m not vindicated, not only would I had lost an excellent income for my family. Besides, a black stain on my resume would hinder me from employment elsewhere.
I’m not saying I handled this three-day suspension perfectly. I did get through it and grew emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Being accused of something you did not do, creates real problems. What mattered most was, I needed something or someone to carry me through my situation.
Now, years later, I look back to unpack what happened during those three days.
First came denial, then disbelief. This can’t be happening to me, I thought over and over.
Denial is a failure to acknowledge an unacceptable truth. Regardless of the many times, you shout or moan, “This isn’t true!.” I’m still blamed for something I did not do. I was experiencing a sense of dread oozing into every crevice of my being.
For some people, it takes minutes, some hours, or weeks to work through denial.
Another time of disappointment in my life my father quipped to me, Denial is not a river in Egypt. His quip didn’t make any sense. Then he added, Do not make light of what happened instead go about making the corrections necessary. Thanks to my dad whenever I want to deny what's happening, his quip knocks me back to reality.
Denial is an emotional response, which is a need for our mind to adapt to what happened.
Denial acts as a shock absorber to our emotions. The Mayo Clinic explains:
But it’s important to realize that denial should only be a temporary measure — it won’t change the reality of the situation.
One thing denial is, it is not a place to set up camp.
The situation taught me something about myself. I needed three relationships. These three will keep you sane. They offer encouragement in times of trouble. Kick denial out the door and get on with your life.
- Encouragement. A spouse or a dear friend to encourage me.
- Being falsely accused is a private matter. So choose wisely the persons from whom you seek encouragement. My wife stood by me with heartfelt encouragement.
2. Belief. I needed this more now than ever. I had built a deep faith in God. My belief had to transcend the current circumstances.
- Bible reading, prayer, and church were the bedrock in building my faith. You will need a belief outside of yourself to carry you. If you only pray when in trouble, you’re in trouble.
3. Action. Develop a simple plan to root out the charge against you.
- The aim of your action should be a course correction, not to take revenge.
I sought inspiration from the bible and through prayer. The Psalms, in particular, had God’s words and spoke to me.
Do not hide Your face from me in the day of trouble; Incline Your ear to me; In the day that I call, answer me speedily. Psalms 102:2
I prayed, boy, did I ever pray — a prayer of introspection. I questioned if there was any truth to the accusation. Another thing prayer does it provides a relief valve to upload your anxieties to God. God understands, yes, He does.
Casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. I Peter 5:7
Since there was no truth to the allegation, I decided to act on my behalf.
When something said about you is not true, there comes a time to rise above the accusation.
Develop a plan. You must see the sunrise on a new day and get a grip.
You can either take action or you can hang back and hope for a miracle. Miracles are great, but they are so unpredictable.” — Peter Drucker
Wipe away the tears, unclench your fists, and grab a plan of action.
I had three days to act, no time to twiddle my thumbs. I went directly to the source.
I called Glenn, my accuser, on the phone. I went to a payphone to make the call. Do you remember payphones? Not sure why I did this since I had nothing to hide. Probably I watched one-too-many TV spy shows. It went something like this as I remember:
Glenn, do you know I’m about to lose my job because of the accusation you made about me? Rudy told me what you said I did. I have no idea what happened. I know I did not cause you to fall. I want you to call Rudy and make it clear I did not do what you had said.
He confessed! I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.
Glenn admitted he had made up this whole story. He did not think it would cause me to lose my job. He begged my forgiveness and promised to call Rudy. Meanwhile back at the factory, my co-workers had come to my defense.
Find Meaning
Alls well that ends well, they say. Easy to say for those not falsely accused, but for us in the trenches of despair, it is mind-boggling.
But it was quite an experience I’ll never forget. The company paid me for the three days off and reinstated me. I would be staying on with full-time employment. Whew! I rejoiced to the Lord. And, I enjoyed working there for eleven more years until the international company closed our local plant.
Encouragement, belief, and action got me through.
Have hope if you are falsely accused.
In this world you will have trouble. But take heart, I have overcome the world. — John 16:33
Overcome.
Epilogue
I never found out what the company did to Glenn and I never asked. I thought it wise to ‘let sleeping dogs lie’ and never spoke his name again.
Thanks for reading,
Richard