What Dreams Should You Have When You’re 72?

2 famous people still continue to inspire me

“Dream Big”

“Dream Big” is the hottest dogma and mantra, at least in the Western world.

“Dream big or go home” is what they say in Australia, as I just learned from my Aussie writing mentor Tim Denning.

I’m 72.

When you are in your 20s, 30s, and 40s, it’s exciting to dream about this or that, all the stuff that you think is hot, exciting, sexy, and big.

But as you get older, some dreams peel and fall off like the bark of a growing birch tree. No matter how cherished they are, some dreams are bound to get old and disappear.

My First Dream: Movies

When I was in my teens I was a true movie buff.

I used to keep a movie journal into which I wrote the title of every film I saw, with the names of the main actors, the whole cast down to the screenwriter and costume designer.

From magazines, I cut the pictures of the stars and glued them right next to their names.

My dream was to become a “movie guy” of some sort when I grew up.

Not surprisingly, the first dream I had when I migrated to the United States was to become a screenwriter in Hollywood. Honest.

Some dreams have tentacles that extend into the capillaries of your mind.

Even though I was a sociology graduate student at Brown University, my ambition was to become a screenwriter or a Hollywood joke writer, not to become a sociologist. That’s where my passion and energy were.

It didn’t happen, and I think I’m better for it as I explained in this post.

But the mind is a waterfall, an active volcano. It never stops generating new dreams.

Car Dealership Dreams

When I got into the car sale business in the late 80s, I dreamed about having my own dealership.

I heard that my boss John Darvish Sr. started his famous DARCARS chain of dealerships around the Washington D.C. Beltway from scratch, out of nothing. The business eventually grew to a $400 million family empire.

Why couldn't I do the same? Wasn’t America the land of once-penniless immigrants creating miracles out of willpower and perseverance?

After a few years, that dream faded away. I didn't have any money. I didn't have the connections. And I was not a good closer in sales situations.

So I reverted back to an earlier dream of mine: writing and publishing.

Since then I traveled on that path and in 2020 “retired” (whatever that means) as a Fortune 100 technical writer. I consider that a dream realized since I’ve always been a wordsmith at heart.

Now I still have dreams but they are very different from those that I had earlier.

Dream Numero Uno

My most important current dream is to have inner peace.

Regardless of what I do or say, how I make and spend my money, I want no regrets.

I don't want to break anybody’s heart.

I don't want to argue for hours about religion and politics and burn inside with resentment and anger.

Why?

Because I’m much more certain at this age that I’m closer to the end of my natural life than I was ten or thirty years ago — whether I win the damn argument or not.

The Nightmare of Winning Arguments

When you are 30, you hang on to every argument like the way a hungry dog hangs on a bone. You’ll never let go of that sucker even if it breaks your jaw. That’s one of the prerogatives of being young.

But at my age, what does an argument matter, really?

There were tons of readers who responded to my series of articles on UFOs as “stupid” and that I didn't have any clue of what I was talking about. One of them, an acknowledged “UFO expert,” has even blocked me on Medium :-) I admired the tenacity with which he hung onto his dream.

There are endless nightmares that are cloaked as dreams. (Well, nightmares are also dreams, aren’t they?)

To be 100% correct about what I’m thinking is not a dream I have anymore. My age taught me what a futile attempt that is.

I do not know a single person yet who said: “Ugur, thanks for all your explanation. You know what? I think you are right. I just changed my mind and from now on I will think just like you do!”

Ha ha ha ha ha! It just won’t happen. That’s as hopeless as Waiting for Godot.

So why waste brain and heart cells for it?

Dream of Self-Sufficiency

Another dream: I hope I will have enough money to take care of myself and my wife until our last day on earth since I don't want to be a burden to anybody.

It’s the ultimate downer for me to ask for money from other people. I just can’t.

That’s why, even though I started a Substack newsletter, for example, I still cannot ask people to subscribe to my newsletter. I’m very introverted when it comes to reaching out to other people's wallets. That’s why being financially self-sufficient has always been one of the top dreams I ever had.

I can say I accomplished that dream in my own limited humble way but am still concerned about losing it since a war, pandemic, bad health, or some other kind of Black Swan event can easily drain anyone’s resources overnight.

Let’s hope for the best. I’m keeping my fingers crossed on that one.

One Global Dream

A big dream I always had is to organize a global humanitarian effort of some sort to help the truly sick, hungry, and needy.

On that point, I have two idols who fuel my aspirations even at age 72.

I have the highest admiration for Bill and Melinda Gates and Jose Andres, the head of World Central Kitchen.

Andres feeds the hungry for free no matter where they are. He is now in Poland, cooking for the 1.5 million refugees from Ukraine. The man has a diamond parking spot reserved for him in Heaven.

The Gates couple (even though they are legally divorced now) try to eradicate malaria and provide fresh water and sanitary toilets to African villages. They are worth every penny I’ve ever spent on Windows OS even though Mac OS is better.

And I just heard about Gates Cambridge Scholarship program which offers scholarships to 80 promising postgraduate students every year.

Way to go Bill & Melinda! Way to go Andres!

Both Gates and Andres could’ve retired comfortably years ago, enjoying every sunset in Hawaii. But they didn’t. They are still trying to reach that highest station in human development instead of resting on their past laurels. That’s a dream worth living for even if you are 172.

A Little Village on the Shores of the Aegean Sea…

But ultimately, I always go back to my core dream: inner peace.

The way I envision it in concrete terms is settling in a small Turkish village on the shores of the Aegean Sea, close to my childhood friends and family, surrounded by olive trees and history, spending my last years by teaching what I know best: English and writing.

In Turkey everyone talks English, so they think they know English. But most don’t. Especially when it comes to writing a decent article or a user guide, there are very few who can hack it.

The Joy of Teaching

How great it would be to share all the decades worth of practice and knowledge I acquired in journalism, technical writing, and creative writing with Turkish youngsters and young professionals who want to build a career path for themselves through the jungle of pro-level English!

That would be the best service I know, the best way to give back to the country where I was born and raised in a meaningful way.

My father lived for 94 years. My mother passed away at 88. I believe in genetics. So I hope I have another 15 or 20 good years in me.

I know I won't spend those years by posting my pictures next to a canary yellow Lamborghini and asking people to register for my “How to Be a Billionaire” course. I laugh aloud when I see calls to such futile dreams that only a young hustler can conjure up.

Summing Up

To be a very kind and patient person (which is a work in progress), continuing to be a sharing person (which I am to a large degree), and sleep like a baby every night when my head hits the pillow is the top dream I have at age 72.

To me, it seems to be a pretty good one to last for the next 20 years, unless Bill Gates or Jose Andres ring my phone to give them a hand (which is very unlikely).

I hope your dreams, regardless of your age, but especially when you are 72, will bring you hope and joy for every day you spend on our lovely and troubled earth.

Forget about the credit cards — what dreams do you have in your wallet?