We Need To Intentionally Practice Gratitude, Seriously.

And no I am not talking about the influencer preachings of manifesting everything you want.

I’m talking about developing a habit that reinforces in us a feeling of gratefulness even during tough circumstances. Because if we find ourselves in the middle of a rough patch, we need to look for what good we still have around us to keep moving forward.

When influencers give us tours of their mansion size houses and share pictures or videos of their travels around the world and crack it up all to ‘manifestation’, I find that to be more of a cop out in order to not share what steps they truly took to become successful. Some of it may have been pure luck, but in our society who would fess up to just getting ‘lucky’?

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have anything against manifesting the things that you want, there’s a time and place for it for sure. But I believe at the foundation of manifesting the life that we want is gratitude.

I believe having and intentionally seeking a deep sense of gratitude allows us to accept and be content with what we have and also what we don’t have. Having gratitude and practicing gratitude constantly, allows us to find happiness in the hard times but also to experience true joy when we have plenty. Essentially it gives us peace of mind.

Our consumerist society teaches us that we need to constantly be on the lookout for the latest trend, the latest development, always looking for the next best thing, aka, we can never have enough. No wonder we feel like what we have isn’t ever ‘good enough’. We’re trying to keep up with the Jones's on a whole new level. These days we’re not just trying to acquire what they have, but what they look and act like. We’re not just chasing for the next pair of shoes or the latest iPhone. We’re now looking to change our bodies, adjust our faces and change our personalities. In the pursuit of this, we will never be satisfied. I’ve heard Brene Brown coin this in our society as a scarcity mindset — the ‘never enough’ culture.

In my experience I found that practicing gratitude changed my perspective from the glass half-empty to the glass half-full. It allowed me to change my thoughts from ‘why can’t I have this’ to ‘I can have that, but that’s not what’s truly important’. Practicing gratitude helped me identify what are the things that truly matter to me, and turns out they were quite simple but vast in meaning.

I am grateful that I have a healthy family who the majority have survived through the pandemic. I have a roof over my head and plenty of stylish clothes (at least I think they are) to wear whenever I go out. I have no lack of food and have the privilege to enjoy it with my loved ones quite often. I have an amazing community and group of friends whom share similar values to mine and are amazing people with huge hearts. In practicing gratitude, and also learning what vulnerability means from Brene Brown, I identified the things that matter to me most come from the connections that I have with the people whom I love and respect.

Learning, understanding, and knowing what I stood for and what truly mattered allowed me to take on the perspective that anything that was an add-on to what I already had was a blessing. And when you’re grateful and caring for what you have, even if it’s ‘small’, the universe, God, whatever you want to call it, has a way of sending more your way because ‘It’ knows that you have the gratitude and respect required to be able to receive and take care of more.

If the foundation of your ‘manifestation’ isn’t based on having a better life and providing for your family or changing your world, essentially good intentions, I don’t think the ‘power of manifestation’ is going to work on your favor. Like I said before, the universe has a way of knowing if you’re ready for more. I understand that on the outside it may look like some of these influencers may not ‘deserve’ what they have, but to be honest who are we to judge?

I don’t know what their life was like before they became influencers. I don’t know what obstacles they encountered on the way to their success. I don’t know if what they have accomplished thus far actually makes them happy. We’ve all heard the saying ‘money can’t buy happiness’, and I’m pretty certain this applies to influencers too.

Manifesting what we want is never a bad thing. I believe wanting more for our lives means that we’re actually meant to do more and make great things happen. But we need to have the right intentions motivating us to create this change, otherwise what are we really trying to achieve?

I’m still on my way but I’m grateful that I got started, because having gratitude even in the hard times keeps me on track with my goal of sharing my life lessons and experiences in hopes to help another person.

I’ll leave you with some of my favorite books that helped me get on my way (Disclaimer: these are affiliate links so if you choose to purchase any of the books I will receive a small commission that supports me and my writing — thank you!).

• Your Next Chapter By Evelyn D. Watkins.
• Choose Your Perspective By John Martin.
• Daring Greatly By Brene Brown.
• Dream Makers by Jim “The Rookie” Morris.

I’d love to hear your thoughts, perspectives and experiences in the comments section. If you prefer I can be reached directly at my email [email protected]. I also have a blog that speaks more about me and my mission — youwholly.com. Feel free to check it out and any feedback would be greatly appreciated.